i'm WISE!!! or maybe not?
oh god.. why did you create mundane and painful things such as wisdom teeth?
My wisdom teeth (3 of 'em: 2 at the right jaw, 1 on the bottom left) have been trying to stretch out and grow non-stop..
hurts a fucking lot, but hey.. =)
i'm wise?
maybe not.
ah. screw it.
anyway, 50 minutes till the second i kiss 2005's fuckin' ass SAYONARA, and welcome in my lovely and torturous 2006.
yes, i can just see it now... '06 isn't gonna be any more pleasent than what i have today, this year.
it's just gonna another bullshit-allergic year.
argh.
when will everyone learn to GROW UP and stop being prissifying acts of insanity and practice some self-control?
see, we have IDIOTS like frigging osama bin laden, and cranky mr saddam, and hell knows who else we have on the list. jesus christ, save us AGAIN, will ya?
or has god literally WALTZED out the front door on a permanent vacation?
if next year isn't any better than this year, i don't know if civilisation can last for another 3 decades.
honestly, we'd be ripping out other people's heads, limbs and um.. eyeballs and nuts and bolts.. and oh whatever.
have a merry and happy new year, and keep your head in for a raincheck, you buffons.
yes, i can be a buffon sometimes too, just like you.
shut up, eat some shit and go and die or something.
cheers,
you're a lovely person too. yeah.
hello. goodbye!!
hello everyone!!
let me just take a moment to make an announcement to a special friend of mine!! (prolly one of the most significant during my secondary school life)
Her name is GINS. ;) Jill is what she loves calling herself and formally, we call her Gillian Tay. AND I shan't go on any further about what felix and I always call her coz that's between gins and me and him. =)
Now babe, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
Today is gins' birthday, so here's wishing her so that all her dreams and wishes keep coming true this new year of her's!!! =)
i miss you babes!!! know that I shall join you in the havocness that you wreck on the dance floor and perhaps we can wreck more soon too!
-End announcement-
right-o! i SO spent my thursday slacking nicely again. no really. didn't even study one bit.. oh sigh..
whatever, today is a new day, and I shall instill more self-discipline in me more than ever... I shall study stupid bioinformatics (no i really don't like that module much now that I think about it) and some of molecular genetics online too...
CMS drives me insane. really.
stupid thing doesn't work. took me an hour and a half just to complete 15 questions and NO, it's not due to incompetency. stupid thing decided it'd be lovely to just be a bastard to me.
OH!!!
2006 is coming right up in less than 72 hours!
What are your new year's resolution(s)??
I have 3 on my list actually, and I've so far fulfilled one.. haha..
I thought a bit of head start would be great.. because i'm sure that the list would be building up very soon!
Here's my top 3 for the while:
1) More self-discipline (lots and lots of it)
2) Be more organised than ever
3) Renew 5-year-goal plan.
So, I've already completed my 5-year goal plan renewal somewhat..
Hopefully I have it right. Or the consequence would be dire.
ian says he hasn't had anything planned for his resolutions list. Lucky fella.. nothing to worry about.. but to each his/her own!
jolly jolly good..! ^_^
On the side note of today's much appeased ramblings, I went out with Jeremy kor today... yay! haha... like finally man, in a YEAR. goodness. :P (or prolly longer than that!)
we watched Narnia (for me: Again!) and had this HUGE lunch (well it was for me... this pathetic icky cup of pina colada and some okay tasting grilled chicken with speghetti and vegs) and talked crap for about 2 hours... two and a half i'd reckon..
anyway, thanks bro for today's treat!!! whahhahaa...
i promised that the hole in your pocket wasn't too big what, right?
*megawatt grin*
alright, time to hit the showers then off to bed...
going jogging later in the morn with mom again.
(that means more bitching to come! yay!! my mom is SO cool!)
cheerios and toodles!
saving myself some time
the race against time has been set from the very day the holidays started...
i feel that damned stress yet.. hah... looks like i can't be bothered by it one insy bit!
goodness.
somehow or rather, I guess lil' bro will turn out better than gary and i...
i hope things will work out for him.
voices too quiet, silences too loud
Ohhh.... my god. my head is pounding like a
maniac.
anyway, while I smell like I had vanilla essence poured all over me (some new shower gel i got at the lucky draw gift exchange at meeting yesterday), michelle ong would smell like chocolate!! hahahs...
and yeah, she got her chocolate shower gel from the gifts exchange too..
i smell good enough to be eaten like that.. the scent is damn sweet..
ugggh.. so so bored. i hate studying.. but yeah, while i'm forcing myself to study.. i'm hardly getting anywhere. stupid.
okay, back to studying. my parents are yelling at me already for not studying at all..
how do i ever?
my senses move faster than a bullet through the air.
how do I slow down?
or maybe, how do I ever keep up with myself?
my newest (and probably the only) idol is lindsay lohan. haha.. yeah yeah..
felix reckons that she's got a huge forehead, and I think that if were to be as skinny as her, my head would look frigging huge and i'd have an equally huge forehead as well.
damn.
i hate huge foreheads. not that I fancy having a narrow forehead. i think that makes people look dumb in every sense. (to have a narrow forehead, that is)
anyway, how the hell do I ever keep up with myself?
my life's question to solve.
hahs... okay, back to work.. immuno, here i come.
WHAHAHA!!!
Felix and Jun were fucking seh ah!
Believe and you will find a way.
I am driven by a simple goal: To prove to myself that I can do everything that is do-able.
One day, I am going to bungee jump and still make it out alive. and when I do get out alive, I'm gonna do it again another 5 times.
Just for the fun of it. ;)
Tonight, I was supposed to go to Rouge with felix, deb and rica. gin (or jill as she likes being called. just plain gillian to you all) couldn't make it coz she's got camp. =(
I would very much like her to have come... so much fun it'll be.
anyhow, read the above, "was
supposed". Deb's mom found out that she's going to the club, and said no. after much persuation, she gave consent, but then amanda said she'd love to go too.. so i informed deb and her mom went into a tirade about this and that. not very pleasant, so i shan't bother filling you on the details on that.
Ric's dad found out... and he too.. well he doesn't want his daughters going clubbing for fear that they don't return home till 3 in the morning..
so... brain washing for ric....
it's so depressing for her... i feel depressed for her, coz I'd hate for my dad to nag and lecture me about stuff like this over dinner.
i'll mull things over a few drinks later at rouge anyway.
su placed me on the list. =) rockin' good, yaw.
it's gonna rain.
clouds set in grey.
wind blows my hair array.
how, why, oh must i?
feelings swing,
like how the trees sway
according to the winds
violent objections
sorrowful endings
oh must i really?
should you ever
give me any peace
of your mind
pleasure
of nothingness
frustration
of quietness
what of this?
that stirs in my soul
creates disasters for all.
stirring in your hearts
your minds
your souls too.
look and behold,
life, in bold.
ah. crap crap crap.
mixed
i feel mixed up right about now.
hah...
it feels weird to feel confused.
I am happy,
I am sad,
I feel nostalgic,
I feel frustrated.
I feel tired and exhausted,
I feel contented; oddly.
I feel weird to feel this way.
I feel that I just lost someone's trust.
I feel bad about it.
That's what makes me frustrated.
Anyway, I've been thinking and thinking so much nowadays, that I forgot what I was thinking about in the first place. Has it ever occured to me how dumb I can get? Yes, it has occured to me several times these few weeks recently.
Such thorough thoughts, what do they even stand for?
I seriously have no idea, that'll be my own reply to my own question once more.
Oh jeez. Life is pathetic when one has to think too much about nothing that one can't even decipher of what they're thinking of.
Are you keeping up?
I feel impaired by all these thoughts. It wasn't only just a week ago when I found a little piece of life's greatest answers to the one primal question, "What is life and how do we live it?"
Now that I've understood it, I've kept it aside in my mind, and went on searching of another piece of the answers.. I do feel that I'm getting somewhere there. but it'll take such a long time.
oh gosh.
I feel like taking a super long sleep and never to wake up again.
i think i shall just go do that now, only that I will wake up tmr morning.
good night.
`oh finally... week 6 is over..
`oh finally!!!
you know, week 6 is such a bitch week. every single lecture is SO long, heavy and dragging. It makes me dread to want to even wake up every morning to subject myself to such torture which my mom says "it's a joy!".
screw it.
ughs.
it's okay, that's what i
ALWAYS, ALWAYS tell myself.
it's only another
NINE weeks to go.
And then i subject myself to pure torture again.
this time, it's the exams.
2 weeks after that (or maybe only 1), it's attachment.
shit.
uhhh...
Suddenly, I hate school.
but oh well... a few more months and i'm outta there...
i just need to do well...
superbly well.. amanda is right.. i need to learn how to get my A's.
aww this is crap.
anyway, this week was shit assed bad.
changed my bag, nearly got yelled at by mr teo (read: SAO), dozed in lectures, woke up late all week long and now.. this.
I need to exercise more discipline on myself.
Stuck on .....
Lately, I haven't had much to blog about...
Many things have happened recently, but it's nothing worthy to blog about.
Unless you count going around town to laugh like a mad ass and go sulking at a bag shop just to get my bag changed coz i thought it was about to spoil..
anyway, breaking away from my weekend blogging for today..
hahs.. mid-week blogging. At midnight at that.
So yeah.. i've been stuck on a song as of late.
Luxurious by Gwen StefaniWorking so hard, every night and day
And now we get the pay back
Trying so hard, saving up the paper
Now we get to lay back
Working so hard, every night and day
And now we get the pay back, the pay back, the pay back
Champagne kisses, hold me in your lap of luxury
I only fly first-class desires, you're my limousine
So elegant the way we ride, our passion it just multiplies
There's platinum lightning in the sky
Look I'm livin' like a queen
This kind of love is getting expensive
We know how to live, baby
We're luxurious, like Egyptian cotton
We're so rich in love, we're rollin' in cashmere
Got it in fifth gear, baby
Diamond in the rough is lookin' so sparkly
Working so hard, every night and day
And now we get the pay back
Trying so hard, saving up the paper
Now we get to lay back
Working so hard, every night and day
And now we get the pay back, the pay back, the pay back
Sugar, honey, sexy baby
When we touch it turns to gold
Sensitive and delicate, kinda like a tuberose
You know you are my treasure chest
It's pure perfection when we kiss and
You're my Mr., I'm your Miss
Gonna be until we're old
This kind of love is getting expensive
We know how to live, baby
We're luxurious, like Egyptian cotton
Working so hard, every night and day
And now we get the pay back
Trying so hard, saving up the paper
Now we get to lay back
Working so hard, every night and day
And now we get the pay back, the pay back, the pay back
[2x]
Cha-ching, cha-ching, we're loaded and we're not gonna blow it
Cha-ching, cha-ching, we're hooked up with the love cause we grow it
Cha-ching, cha-ching, we got hydroponic love and we're smokin'
Cha-ching, cha-ching, we burn it, you and I, we are so lit
And we're so rich in love, we're rollin' in cashmere
Got it in fifth gear, baby
Diamond in the rough is lookin' so sparkly
Working so hard, every night and day
And now we get the pay back
Trying so hard, saving up the paper
Now we get to lay back
Working so hard, every night and day
And now we get the pay back, the pay back, the pay back
i just love the beats and tune...
listen to it.. you might just love it loads too.. ;)
revelations....
revelations, much many, too little.
i've seen revelations unreveal their glory.
dear friend, don't sigh.
look up, for life's just begun.
the end may be near, but death will await!
revelations, many much, plenty in bountifuls!
some bold and couraged, mine subtle and quick.
grasp it before it slips,
grasp it friend.
for i have,
and am enjoying its wonders.
oh gosh....
today has been simply splendid, some! =)
while class was alright, i just dozed off completely during dr how's class... i couldn't help it! i was just so exhausted today.
anyway, met up with deb and rica today...
hahahaha... i haven't felt any happier than today compared to the past month in which i haven't seen debra at all...
dad's got like SO many wires sticking on his chest. the doctors said his palpitations weren't good, it was weak and instead of making him stay in the hospital, they let him come home, provided he had those things on him for 24hours.
Hopefully i can wake up early tomorrow to accompany him to the hospital...
i worry for him. There are only 5 people in the world that i absolutely cannot live without. And they are my most loved ones.
my parents are 2 of them.
ok i'm like so tired. tomorrow deb and i will go down to tampines to go see sherwin... and check some stuff out.. yipees!
right.. byeee!
Wednesdays...
Wednesdays are my favourite days, yet, today wasn't a very good day.
That is why i'm blogging for abit today...
Just to get that momentary scare out of my system for a while...
Anyway, today I went to donate blood.
Mom voiced her concern over that since you know, aunt red came. hahaha...
but nonetheless, I still went ahead to TFA for the blood donation during molecular genetics. stupid of me to go during lessons. missed an important lesson...
SO anyway, I didn't feel too good when the nurse was poking that damned needle into my vein. I think she poked it in wrongly.. and even worse when the other nurse told me when she couldn't get enough blood outta me, and starting pulling and tugging, twisting the needle about, while it was still stuck in my arm. Bruising it entirely.
my fingers on both hands turned so icyly cold.
When I walked out of that room, I was shivering inside, clammy on my forehead, and being beaten by the sun and was feeling feverish all over. Mazia told me I looked like a ghost and was asking if I was alright.
Breathing came in much difficulty, and I merely crawled up to my bag up at the seats, packed my stuff and went off without even so much as looking at anyone
and then... god.. everything after that was bad bad bad....
couldn't breathe, my head was so light, every single sound irritated the shit out of me. Waiting for dad to arrive was like, i dunno.. probably the worst thing I had to wait for..
by the time i got home, mom was waiting downstairs at the carpark for me, got upstairs and she made me this GREAT hot cup of milo.. yummy.. felt slightly better, but 2 seconds after that, I nearly hurled everything out (thank god i didn't)...
Next thing I know, I woke up at 2.45pm. I think I KO-ed at 11.30 in the morning...
i'm still feeling pretty shaken up with today's incident, but I'm feeling much better now... abit light headed at times, but yea...
haha..
well, back to work.
i'm a youth because.....
I'm a Youth, only because....
SHAWN IS YUCKY.oh whom which, btw, proudly told me that he acted in True Files, Frontline (chinese one on channel U), and lately, he just got a QUICK role in an upcoming movie that will be exclusively aired in japan and on Ch61 soon. go figure.. i can't figure out too...
that's what I wrote on that sign board and made my long lost friend, Steven, take a picture of shawn with the board in front of him.
whahahhaha....
it was fun with them around..
coz the moment they left.. it was utter boredom and I spent an hour and a half staring at the guy blowing up balloons and stuff...
and he prolly thought "What the hell is that stupid girl staring at me for?"
anyway..
i think i shall stay away from ALL food that is junk (deep fried stuff) coz i think it's been giving me alot of problems lately.
A
LOT of problems.
I feel like my intestines are too awfully greased up.
which makes me feel icky, and it makes me eat more for some reason. =S
okay, I gotta go now....
reports!
and so the sibling war ensues.
you know, my older brother, whom everyone now knows...
is a damned fucking jackass.
yes. i hate him, and i still do hate him.
while half the time i thought he's gotten a little better..
here he is, spending 99% of his free time at his gf's place, coming home only when her mom insists that he goes back home. Have he no shame?
"Have you no decency? Have you?"
he's a bastard and I say so.
He's a frigging fucker and i frigging hope he gets struck by lightning.
stupid idiot.
yes i'm cursing that damn jerk.
he deserves it.
I know he hates my guts too, so the feeling is utmostly mutual.
grrr!
oh snap.
headacheeeeees suck big time.
ughs.
mutton, stop complaining that i call you mutton.
you're a piece of mutton coz you keep going "Bahz".
or would you rather i call you porky-chops?
right, i know that too... mutton's just fine. ;)
what michael says when in immunology lecture:
"So.. if one day you should find yourself so lonely and start crying, don't worry... coz IgA will
always, ALWAYS be with you. It only turns up when you start crying. So you won't have to feel lonely anymore!"
what a classmate of mine exclaimed about immunocytochemistry sometime this week:
"I only did till the part where they told me to cook the hippo!"
"Cook
WHAT?"
"cook hippo lor"
My first thoughts on that:
'Why do they want to cook a hippo for?'It was later on that I found out for myself that he was talking about the hippocampus. That ruddy thing that gives you intelligence, and your memory.
I WANT A BIGGER HIPPOCAMPUS!!!! mine's too small.
tsk.
anyway, off i go....
tired.
i'm so so tired. exhausted within, not on my appearance.
i'm just tired. haiz.
In all certainty, I regret doing many many things.
But what is regret, when I first set out into this particular path in my life, telling myself that no matter what happens, I will only have myself to turn to comfort for, and things won't be easy (nope, not at all).
I'd expected all sorts of adversities popping up everywhere, and surely, they did. My number one nemesis, Laziness, and the lack of discipline.
hah.
i laugh at my lack of skills in those areas. Else I'd be high-flying, free-caring, worry-free.
worry-free.
that's all I want to be.
Is there not a day that I don't frown in frustration due to worry?
nope.
Anyway, Jon's home... :)
he's getting his arse kicked into NS in like 3 days time.
Good on you, boy! Go slap some muscles on your bones, you scrawny thing!
You'll come out looking better than you will right now, i'm sure.
hahas...
I haven't seen deb or rica in so long. I mean, I met rica only last week.. but I haven't seen debra in the LONGEST TIME EVER! sob!
okay okay.
i have to go sleep now.
have meeting on saturday morn, some ycm thing sunday afternoon with ling (yipee!!), and like 6 lectures of molecular genetics to cover (half of which i don't understand?)
damn.
Note to self: I'm dreaming of the day when I get those 3 estates, the 4 cool vehicles, my 5 other family members smiling happily in a new home, and that 6 figure monthly pay check.
yes, one day, I shall rise from these boiling times like a pheonix, and very nicely, I shall own the material likelihood of those luxuries.
one day. That dream will surface, and I will then finally set up my own firm, and on the side track, a cafe. Just ONE cafe. haha...
ok, maybe 2 or 3, or 15 (one in each major country).
aiya, see how first lah ah? :)
good night, toodles, cheerios.
5 words.
I am SO fucking tired.
end of story, no more, na-da.
oh right, just the other part where I was supposed to tell you about my trip to IBN, only I can't be bothered to. Lest A*Star decides to sue.
nope. seditious acts aren't good. haha.
ahhhh. stupid. goodnight everyone! immunocytochemistry AWAITS!
"if it's always microns, how come it's never mu meters?"
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