2004-07-31

Behind MY hidden mask...

Most of you don't see it, do you?
how sometimes, I just stone, veg out like that.. perhaps everyone sees it, but they don't make a move to ask what's on my mind, that's prolly better coz I won't have to complain as much as debra says that I do...
Well, I've decided not to complain anymore. I mean, my best friend's complaining that I complain too much.. so, yah. Not gonna complain anymore. how's that sound, bra? good? hope you're happy about that.

Anyway, yeah, nothing much happened. Went to rica's place. chilled there for about 2 hours, came home to find my brother being a complete ass.. making dad frigging upset. I think dad was crying, coz he was so sad. :( it hurts to see my family slowly breaking up like that. All just coz of that one stupid fucked up bitch who broke my brother's heart. I swear I WILL FIND THAT FUCKING WHORE AND BEAT HER UP INTO BLOODY PULP!!!!

pourquoi doit-il être de cette façon? les choses ont pu être tellement d'améliorer... si seulement il était plus futé..

Anyway, behind my hidden mask... there lies another person that's not far from the one you see... i dunno.. i spew out such rubbish all the time, so yah.. hahaha...

Currently chatting with Yihan, PeiSuan and Bra... yup yup...
anyways, yeah.. this is getting annoyingly boring, taking care of two sleeping pigs, one called the older brother nicknamed, gary, and the other called the younger brother nicknamed edwin... *sighs*

Man, I hate this so much.

I can't wait to get out of this hell hole and into another place nicer..

Oh, right.. I volunteered for this zebrafish project. It's an in-house school project.. it's gonna be cool.. it's a 3-year thing in school.. like a follow-up project thing.. by year 3, i'll be doing uni-level stuff.. I hope to pass my diploma with distinction, that way I get to skip two years in UNSW. Cool, innit?

Yeah, about going to rica's place today, well, she asked what shit I usually chat with amanda.. (she didn't say those exact words, 'shit' was my doing *grins*) seriously, it isn't anything much. Just commenting about how boring it gets.. what goes on in our lives for that day.. that kinda stuff.. what would you want me to say anyway? "Oh.. hi.. um.. yah.. okay.. um.. i don't wanna talk much to you..." ?? I don't dislike anyone unless that person's as annoying as that bitch who keeps singing off key....

Okay, i gotta shut up. I'm complaining too much.

so yeah, I gotta go. bye.

c'est la façon de vivre...

What IS the way of living?
hahah.. it's in the never or now, that life persists. That is the way of life..

anyway, yeah..
I slept at like 4am on Thursday night, and I was LATE for class.. for the first time in my school life, i was more than 10 minutes late....
I was like an HOUR late... >__<

it's a good thing Mrs Lau didn't mind it much..

Anyway, I chatted with only 3 people last night.. haha.. Allison!!!! you didn't come online.. :S so couldn't pass you those songs.. haiz.. nevermind, wednesday night then pass to you..

Anyway, from Unconscious Mutterings:

1) Sleep :: tight, don't let the bed bugs bite!
2) Stats :: i'm attached. lol
3) Portfolio :: Art portfolios again! i hate those!
4) Lipton :: tea!
5) Telly :: tubbies.. "tinkie winkie, dipsy, la-la, poh..."
6) Immigrate :: airports
7) Viable :: liabilities
8) Serene :: that's my cousin!
9) Mountain :: Mt. Blanc, i loved it there..
10) Natalie :: Imburglia... her songs are cool..

And from The Thursday Threesomes...:

::Knit One, Purl Too::

Onesome- Knit one: Do you have a crafty hobby? Knitting, stitching, scrapbooking or model building, whatever it is, tell us about it! Or is there a crafty hobby you'd like to take up if had the time and/or money to do so?
It's golf.. lol.. i don't do old ladies' stuff... anyway, nah.. i don't wanna take up a craft even if i had the time and money.. perhaps when i'm like 50, then i'll think of it.. lol!

Twosome- Purl: Or rather, pearl. What's your birthstone? And while you're at it, what's your sign? *g*
my birthstone? oh hell, i forgot.. it was some stone.. haha.. but i'm Libra..

Threesome- Too: Too much? Have you had enough of the political coverage already? ...or are you waiting for things to really gear up in the Fall?
yea.. too much political stuff... where's the gossip all gone to? I'll bet you that Bill Clinton case was all for publicity..


Lastly, Friday's Feast!...:

Appetizer
Name 3 things that you think are beautiful.
1) my boyfriend
2) my family
3) my life

Soup
What was the last concert you attended?
That was just back in Feburary.. I went for this Christian "Worship under the stars" rock concert..

Salad
What is one thing that frightens you about getting older?
The responsibility that sits on my shoulders starting to get heavier and more complicated as the day passes.. Not being able to cope with it is what scares me the most..

Main Course
Tell us about one of your funny quirks or habits.
um.. well, I'm not really sure, but yeah, I was told I tend to start humming a tune whenever I'm feeling an extreme of emotions (stress, sadness, happy, etc).. haha..

Dessert
If you could extend one month to 50 days (instead of the normal 28, 29, 30, or 31), which month would you want to lengthen?
Obviously the month of the holidays.. so that I can sleep more, you know?


okay, that marks the end of those things.. I wonder if they have this Monday to Sunday thing.. So far, I've only got stuff for Wednesdays, Thursdays and Fridays...
this is fun... :)

Anyway, yeah, I chatted with um... okay, more that 3 people last night. Debra, serica and amanda.. and steven's younger brother... bloody bugger was annoying.
Have to go ask steven of his e-mail... and um.. yeah, guess that's only all the people I was chatting with last night.

I slept rather early last night.. nearly 1am I guess... ooh! over ONE THOUSAND visits to my site! how COOL is that?!? :D


Hmm.. going over to Rica's place later, said she wants to have a chat with me.. I don't know if I want to think it a good thing, coz she hasn't been exactly pleased with me the last few days.. dunno what's up with her man... she's got her own problems to solve.. it's hard sometimes, to be there for everyone.. sorry I'm not always there for ya, rica..

ugh... well, it's not like anyone's here for me all the time.. well, terra's always here anyway.. hahaha...
She was just attacking my fingers again.. she was like, screwing up her eyes and just biting my hand with so much vigor, and man... she BITES... hahha.... she's such an adorable little cat...

anyway, gotta run now... toodles...

2004-07-29

FINALLY.......

no, i don't believe... gawd how i hate that song now!
oh it's the American Idol 3's "I believe"...

I find horoscopes so interesting..

Wednesday, July 28
Libra September 23 -- October 22
There are too many projects right now for you to just focus on one, but you have a lot of time. You can do them all. Just be sure you let everyone know if things get to be too much.

Thursday, July 29
Libra September 23 -- October 22
There are whole sections of your neighborhood you've never really explored before. Hop on your bike today and take a little tour. You never know who you'll run into.


and why's that so? only coz for wednesday, it was soooo true, while on today's.. it wasn't even true.. haha.. it's true that I have too many projects for me to just focus on one.. Alot of time, yea, guess so.. But i'm dead on sure trying to get them all done.. haha.. and I've let every know that things are certainly getting too much.. so yeah.. hahaha..


Anyway, last night, I got home at like 11pm, thanks to dad..
I had choir practice the whole of yesterday. 9-10am, it was warm-ups with the choir, 10-12noon was a special session with Clement Chow, (the guy who wrote 'count on me singapore' and the few other songs) and then we breaked for lunch. I thought we could like go off for IMB lecture, but miss Ang held us back to practice some more. At 1.30pm, we set off to Block A, level 3.. it was the Media productions studio that we walked into and I practically called it "The popstar's Jail House" coz we were stuck in this dimly-lit, sound-proof room for a solid 6 hours recording and practicing from 2pm till 6.30pm, before we breaked for dinner and continued from 7.50pm till 10pm... it was like 12 hours of singing??? my gawd... some stupid bitch kept going off tune, and when we got her KICKED out of the room, she VOLUNTEERED herself BACK into the room, by fucking hell! she's such a THICK-HEADED moron!!!!! >__<
And she could still look SOOOOO fuckin' SMUG about going off tune.. blardy hell.. i was soooooooooo pissed off at her! She was from year 2, but I hecked that fact and was actually dissing her indirectly in her face.. the other Year 2 students weren't so happy about it coz they found out that I found out that they were calling her "carrot cake" and that I was openly dissing her. The fact was, she didn't even bother about it! she had this moronic smug smile on her face.. ugh.... *rolls eyes and shudders* stupid bitch. Such an annoyance to the choir.

Anyway, after sOOOOOOO much singing, well... i'll say, the final version still pretty much sucked.. coz the male soloist's voice was like.. *makes a disgusted face* his voice... well, it's gross.. he goes horribly off tune, and he's got this horrible wavy voice... it isn't smooth, straight, and clear.. i mean, even if it's raspy, it isnt' this impactful strong voice that this other guy in the choir has. I wonder why they didn't pick him over that current soloist. I mean, this other guy sounds great. *shrugs* I'll just have to bear with it.. But the only thing that I enjoyed was the pillars of that building.. it was ROUNDED.. and HUGE and so HUGGABLE.. I now know the new definition as to why people say "To Stand Strong like a Pillar".. hehe.. so that people like me can hug them... muahahah...

Oh, I had to wear a DRESS to school today. Seldom will you see me in a dress, more seldom in a skirt, let me just tell you that first. I'M A BOYISH GIRL AND I HATE FRILLY GIRLY STUFF.
Anyway, everyone said I looked like a poly teacher in my outfit in class.. basically, I just wore this red button-down shirt over my dress.. and i looked so.. um.. mature? old? hahaha...

anyway, yeah, today I managed to get off early.. :D thank gods.. I haven't had a decent night's sleep for the past 3 weeks... 2nd week of school was trying to get used to the system, 3rd week was last week. one helluva busy week.. and this week's the 4th week. it's even worse than last week... -__-||| yeah...
nevermind, next week i shall be free.. and I'll meet debbie on tuesday after school. She misses me lah... right, deb? hahahaha....

okay, i gotta run... haha.. chatting with so many people online...
i gotta like do ALL my homework, reports and what not.... oh yah..compile the info for the rest to fall back on and to refer to for the comm. skills project...

alright.. toodles peeps...
;)

2004-07-27

veni creator spiritus

oh shit.. i told allison and peisuan the wrong thing.. haha.. nevermind..
will tell them it's wrong tomorrow... :P

anyway, today sooo busy and stressed up...
ugh...

i can't talk today.. *sobs* gotta go do my homework and pass it up tomorrow even though I won't be having classes tomorrow.... bye for now!

2004-07-26

what a fuckin' annoying day.

i dunno... everyone's having this GLUM thing about them today..
it's fuckin' annoying, i'm telling you..

I woke up to some frigging horrible pain-inducing indigestion. Well, I THINK it's indigestion. It's most prolly food poisoning. Didn't have much of an appettite today. Dunno what's up with me, I just don't like eating much nowadays. It's such a waste of time.. Maybe I'll just isolate myself from everyone else slowly.. haha.. I dunno.. I just felt like avoiding everyone the moment I stepped into school today..
Kumaran was being moody today.. said he felt lonely and all that.. well, so do everyone.. haha.. :( *sighs* makes one wonder, where is the love anyway? right?

but anyways, he was just pissed off with everyone's cheerfulness once school ended today. He wasn't happy that eric, tim and sophia tagged along. Something to do with last friday.. dunno what happened last friday.. so.. yeah.. *shrugs*


hmm... I've begun to spin this web of tangledness around myself lately. I dunno.. it's just all confusing me too, I admit.. haha.. But blah... I'm just gonna shut up about it...

2004-07-25

il est hors de ma vie...

il est hors de ma vie, mais ce qui si je ne veux pas qu'il aille?

yeah.. I just don't want him to go.. but he's just moving away and away, further and further, and while half the time he keeps me close to him, half the while he shuns me... *sighs*

haha.. jeez... I just make things out to be so dramatic, don't I? Well, it was a trait that he passed on to me.. haha.. haydern's a really special guy.. he really is.. you know, I could go on and on about him and I'll never get tired.. haha.. so I think I'll force myself to stop that right this moment..

Anyways....
I've been slacking sooo much.. haha.. the entire weekend doing nothing. Absolutely nothing.. I've been thinking of haydern over the weekend actually.. haha.. I miss that fella.. well, i cant' help to miss the guy..

okay, I just got a reality check from Terra, my lovely feline companion.. :S she just bit my toe.. yeah.. she LOVES biting toes.. it's a fetish next to playing IN plastic bags. For some strange reason, she doesn't like chasing after wool balls. Well, she's cleaning her face while lying on her side on the cold marble floor. She's just so fuckin' adorable.. I wish she was a human, at least I could bite her like that.. hahaha..

oh gawds... everyone, buy this 4-D number.. 2241... my god... i just felt an earthquake tremor!!!! you NEVER feel tremors in singapore...goodness me... i'm telling you, it's sooooo freaky...

okay, haha.. anyway...mannn..got so much homework to do....
i'm outta here... haha..
byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee......

quizzies...

1. WHAT IS YOUR FULL NAME?: Angeline Tan ('nuff said)

2. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING??: sec 3 camp t-shirt

3. WHAT SONGS ARE U LISTENING RIGHT NOW?: Clay Aiken's "The Way"

4. WHAT IS YOUR hPHONE NUMBER?: 9******* hahahaha!

5. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?: COLD brownies!

6. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD
YOU BE?: Maroon (only coz I lurve that colour)

7. HOW IS THE WEATHER RIGHT NOW?: it's cool and perfect!

8. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?: um.. Allison, that was this morning..

9. FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX?: face features

10. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT YOU THIS?: xuelin.. yeah.. she's a nice girl..

11. Fav dance: fusion dance

12. FAVORITE DRINK?: soya bean milk

13. WHO DO U LIKE?: i like nice people, I love haydern..

14. WHO IS YOUR BEST FRIEND?: Jon, serica, debra, haydern...

15. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SPORT?: golf... i guess..

16. EYE COLOR?: brown

17. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?: sometimes

18. FAVORITE MONTH?: october!

19. FAVORITE FOOD?: dunno leh...

20. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?: spiderman-2..

21. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR?: hmm.. the day I got to know haydern! :)

22. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?: no.. i mean, if it's like lunch with they gang, then i'll ask lor..

31. FAVORITE BOARD GAME(S): monopoly

32. WHAT DID YOU DO LAST NIGHT?: oh, right.. haha.. was having a heart-to-heart, one-to-one sob story chat with peisuan..

33. FAVORITE SMELL(S): smells of bread, fresh and clean laundry, the perfumes I bought from paris..

34. CAN YOU TOUCH YOUR NOSE WITH YOUR TONGUE?: nope

35. BUTTERED, PLAIN OR SALTY POPCORN?: caramelled

36. FAVORITE CAR?: gosh.. i've got sooo many favourites!

37. FAVORITE FLOWER?: lilacs, roses...

38. HOW MANY KEYS ON YOUR KEY RING?: 3.. and counting..

39. CAN YOU JUGGLE?: yeah.. but at only 2 items

40. FAVORITE DAY(S): wednesdays

41. RED OR WHITE WINE?: white

42. WHAT DID YOU DO FOR YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY?: um.. I studied?

43. DO YOU CARRY A DONOR CARD?: no.. but soon I will!

44. LIFETIME GOAl??: be one of the top research scientists..

45. FIRST THING U THINK OF WHEN U WAKE UP IN THE MORNING?: did he message me? no? *big sad sigh*

46. WHAT IS YOUR BIRTH DATE?: 7 Oct

47. CURRENT THOUGHTS? : i wanna watch my TV!!!


QUIZ TWO

1. YOUR HOROSCOPE? Libra

2. SiNGLE OR TAKEN? taken... on technical terms, i'm single, but i like to think other wise.

3. iF TAKEN, BY WHO? haydern!!! :D

4. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN SERiOUSLY HURT BY THE
PERSON YOU LOVE/D?: *sighs* well.... what he said hurt me, deeply, but then again, he wasn't in a right frame of mind..

5. WHAT WOULD BE YOUR REASON iF YOU TURNED
SUiCiDAL? how would i know.. haha..

6. iS SUiCiDE REALLY KiLLiNG YOURSELF?
nope.. suicide is just running away..

7. PREFER COUNTRY OR CLASSiC?
classique..

8. PREFER CUTE/iDiOT OR SMART/UGLY?
smart/ugly you can force the fella to go for plastic surgery after he earns the big bucks..

9. ARE YOU iN A STABLE RELATiONSHiP WiTH YOUR
BF/GF/CRUSH? ugh.. fuck, no!

10. YOU`D EXPECT A TEXT MESSAGE USUALLY FROM: 5 people, debra, allison, kumaran, peisuan and serica.

11. HAVE A BEST FRiEND THAT iS iN THE OPPOSiTE
GENDER? yep! two of them in fact

12. WHAT DO YOU LiKE DOiNG WHEN YOU`RE DEPRESSED
sitting in my room, huddling up in the corner of my bed, listening to sad music

13. CHEERFUL OR BORiNG? eh.. in-between of both..

14. DESCRiBE A PERFECT DATE. anywhere with haydern would be a perfect date.. coz he'll plan some thing really spectacular even if it's impromtu!

15. EVER WONDERED WHY NOBODY KNOWS WHY THE SKY iS BLUE?
yeah, and i reckoned that they're all just dumb..

16. EVER BEEN HURT BY LOVE?
yes..

17. WiLL YOU EVER MAKE THE SAME MiSTAKE AGAiN?
WITH LOVE???
I'll try not too.. it's hard coz you tend to forget stuff..

18. EVER HATED ANYONE LiKE HELL?
hell, yes!

19. DO YOU DO ANYTHiNG WHEN A PERSON BREAKS UP
WiTH YOU AFTER ONE DAY?
um, haha.. well, i'll be still smiling the day after... it WAS just a day afterall..

20. GiVE ONE WORD THAT BEST DESCRiBES WHAT
YOU`RE FEELiNG NOW.
Depressed

21. DO YOU BELiEVE iN YOURSELF?
well, yeah.. i guess.. sometimes not..

22. EVER PHYSiCALLY HURT YOURSELF?
deliberately hurt myself.. yes.. and i make it look like an accident too..

23. EVER VERBALLY HURT YOUSELF?
hmm.... i'm not too sure, i'll get back to you on that..

24. MOTTO iN LiFE.
when life gets tough, stuff a stick up its arse and make life's life more chaos than you can imagine. moral: be insane.

26. HAVE YOU EVER HAD *EXTRA* FEELiNGS ABOUT A
BEST FRiEND FROM(you mean OF *english fail!*)
THE OPPOSiTE GENDER?

crap lah! both of you fail english harh? it's FOR, for fuck's sake... jeeez!
and obviously i HAD extra feelings for haydern! he's my best friend too you know?

27. iF YES, WHAT DiD YOU DO ABOUT iT?
um..i didn't do much about it.. he did everything.. haha. i just responded..

28. iS FAME & MONEY THE MOST iMPORTANT THiNGS iN
YOUR LiFE? NO!!! it's not!

29. DO YOU MAKE ANY MOVEMENTS OR SOUNDS WHEN
YOU`RE SLEEPiNG?
I don't know...

30. ARE YOU DiFFiCULT TO WAKE UP?
YES... very much so..

31. HOW OFTEN DO YOU SLEEP?
as often as i can (which isnt' that often now..)

32. ARE YOU CONVENiENT WiTH THAT?
nope. coz i love to sleep..

33. LAST, HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT YOU WERE PERFECT?
like du'h...i was MADE perfect in MY own way...


Quiz THREE

nAmE: Angeline
piErCiNgs: on the ear lobes.. 2 on the left, 3 on the right
tAttoos: none.. soon
hEigHt: 166cm
shOe siZe: 7
hAiR cOloUr: dyed copper blonde, black
sibLiNg(s): 2 brothers (one older, one younger)


[lAst..]
sOng yOu liStEnEd tO: Copa Cubana by Barry Manilow
cd/vCd yOu bOugHt: forgot
peRsOn yOu'vE cAllEd: er.. allison. this morning


[dO..]
yOu hAvE a cRuSh oN sOmEoNe: no.but i love haydern.
yOu wisH yOu cOuld livE sOmEwheRe eLsE: yeah, right in the Rodriguez Palace. my gawds.. it's huge, i've heard..i wouldn't mind stan's house too actually..
yOu tHiNk abOut sUicidE: most of the time
yOu beLieVe iN onLiNe dAtiNg: no
otHeRs fiNd yOu attRactiVe: obviously, if not they wouldn't be talking to me..
yOu wAnt mOrE piErCiNgs:yeah
yOu likE cLeAniNg: nope
yOu wRitE iN cUrsiVe oR pRiNt: it's like... minute.. it's ugly


[hAvE yOu..]
evEr cRiEd ovEr a giRl: 2 years back. over janice. she committed suicide, 'nuff said.
eVeR cRiEd oVeR a bOy: YES.. just 3 weeks ago.. haydern made me cry..
evEr liEd tO sOmEonE: yea... HAD to..
eVeR bEeN iN a fiSt figHt: yes, with the brothers
shAmpOo dO yOu usE: St. Ive's, Dove's, L'oreal..
aRe yOu sCaRed oF : lotsa things



[nUmbEr..]
oF timEs I hAvE bEeN iN lOvE: once
oF timEs I hAvE hAd my hEaRt bRokEn: twice
of tiMes my nAmE aPpEaR iN thE nEwSpApEr: none
oF sCaRs i hAvE oN my bOdy: loads
of tHiNgs iN my pAst tHat I rEgRet: too many..



[fAvOuRitE..]
5 lEtteR wOrd: it's not five letters, but it's TWO words.. "fucking hell!"
cErEaL: honey waffles
chEwiNg gUm: wiggly's
cOlOuR(s): anything pastel or bright cheery colours.. haydern knows best.. he always gets the right colours all the time..
dAy oF wEek: tuesday
lEaSt fAvE dAy: thursdays
fLowEr: roses, lilacs
jEweLry: eh.. dunnow
sPeCiaL skillS/taLeNts: go figure?
sUmMeR/wiNtEr: winter


[hAvE yOu eVeR..]
gOnE oUt iN pUbLiC iN yOuR pyjAmAs: yes
cRiEd dUriNg a mOviE: yes
bEeN tO nEw yOrk: nope
bEeN tO cAlifOrniA: nope
chiNa: yea
cAnAdA: no
eUrOpE: yes, it's fab!
hOng koNg: yep
aSiA: duh..

[rAndOm..]
whAt timE iS it nOw: 0235hours
aPpLeS oR bAnAnAs: apples
bLuE oR rEd: red
wHat aRe yOu gOnNa dO aftEr yOu fiNisH tHis: sleep
wAt wAs tHe lAst mEaL yOu atE: after dinner snack of brownies
aRe yOu bOrEd: fucking hell bored
lAst nOisE yOu hEaRd: music
lAst tiMe yOu wEnt oUt of stAtE/pRoviNcE: 3 months ago


[fRiEndsHiP aNd lOvE.. ]
dO yOu beLieVe iN lOvE at fiRst siGht: no.. well, it depends
dO yOu wAnt cHiLdrEn oNe dAy aNd if sO, hOw
mAny?: 3....
mOst impOrtAnt tHiNg tO yOu iN a fRiEndsHip
iS: trust


[otHeR iNfOrmAtiOn..]
tHiNg yOu diSlikE abOut yOuRseLf tHe mOst: my naiveness
wOrSt fEeLiNg iN tHe wOrLd: to be left abandoned, with disappointment and anger
whO yOu lOvE: HAYDERN!!!!
whO yOu miSs: I MISS MY BOYFRIEND, haydern!!!




okay, i'm going delirious..time for my ZZZZzzzz... byeeeeee

2004-07-24

hair cut!!!

well, I went to the hair dresser's on impulse today...
mom dragged me there actually... so might as while cut my hair at the same time, yeah?

my fringe is GONE!!!

I went for Choir today.. it was super fun! hahaha..
Had LOADS of fun making GhimAnn... he's my SE president, and in choir as well..
haha... hmm...let's see...

I went to the NYAA orientation thingy today. Quan Jie was explaining to Kumaran and I about what was going on in the club.. It's really interesting, and I think I can do this one award rather easily.. Just gotta know how to make time for it? yeah..

Hmm.. well, everyone should join NYP coz NYP is sooooooo fun! well, at least MY class is fun.. hehe.. we're like this crazy bunch of wackos.. i'm so lucky to have met them..

Anyway, Quan Jie recommended that I ought to propose on setting up Golf as a CCA.. Hmm.. I'll have to give some thought into that.. coz it's ALOT of time and effort put into it...and i'm not sure if I've got enough drive to do that.. perhaps when everything's all leveled out.. then I'll propose it.. :) hehe.. and i'll get mrs lau to help me out with it.. I'm sure alot of the teachers will join.

oh well.. umm... hahaha.. rica... i can't even understand chemistry myself... I'll have to put more effort into studying already...

oh right...Yeah, it's the Friday's Feast:

Appetizer
Name something you've done that made you feel guilty.

hmm... what have I done...? *sly grin* okay, this was a class effort thing okay... back when I was 13.. we actually poured red dye and mixed it with PVC glue just before our history teacher came into class... she'd always sit down first, so we had to make sure it's not too wet or not too stickly dry, so that when she got up.. her butt would look like she had a menstrual stain... *sheepish grin* wicked? i'll tell you.. it was fuckin' fun!

Soup
If you could get rid of one piece of furniture in your house, what would it be, and what would you put in its place?

my room's stuff.. and i'll renovate my room all over again..


Salad
Imagine you've won a contest to be a featured guest on any television sitcom or drama show. On which one would you want to be a guest star?

I wanna be on Who's line is it, Anyway?... it's wicked fun!!! hahaha...


Main Course
Create a cereal. Tell us what you'd name it and what ingredients would be included.

famous amous mini bit choco-chip and pecan biscuit cereal... it'll takes GREAT with warm milk..i'll call it "Angel's breakfast mix", and it's only fit for angels like me!!! Muahahaa....

Dessert
Describe the most memorable night of your life so far.

my most memorable night... okay, this may sound sick, but it was on the night my grandma died.. hahaha... coz i was up doing my work till like 3am, my parents weren't home and the sound system was blasting and gary was at the desktop gaming.. :P cool? I loved it...



okay, I gotta run now.. haha.. toodle-lee-loo!!!

2004-07-23

Sometimes I really wonder...

You know, I really wonder sometimes.. If this blogger account would somehow crash due to an overload of too many entries being posted.. hmm... *thinks* hahaha... well, just a sudden thought.. no answers needed.

Today's Soek's birthday.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY SOEK!!!
We had this flour fight on the 4th floor roof terrace of block R after our electives.. it was Medusa's, Sophia's and the Legendary Idiot's idea to have the flour fight..
It was fun, but it soon turned sour. Legendary Idiot (LI) was living up to his name by throwing flour into Khim's eyes.. poor lass.. she had contacts on.. and her eyes started tearing, thus mixing with the flour, and clumping up in her eyes.. it was horrid.. we had to drag her to the toilets while she was trying hard not to make her eyes tear up.. Arden was soooooo pissed of at LI.. he was like this raging bull.. nearly whacked up LI.. Arden's really protective over khim and soek you see.. coz the three of them came from the same school.. and I know for a fact that even though they weren't close in secondary school, they became really fast and close friends due to the connections they had in their previous school. He's like a sibling towards khim and soek.. so you can imagine how furious he was at LI..

Anyway, I had flour thrown on me for no reason. I didn't even take part in the fight at all.. But somehow Arden shepherded Allison and I over to the center of the roof terrace where we got bombarded with flour bombs by LI and Sophia..

Oh, for the non-MB0406 readers... LI is this guy called Eric. He certainly has lived up to his name of being a legendary IDIOT for this once. Sophia is actually a guy. His actual name is Jun Cheng, but Josephine started calling him Sophia after he called her "Maria".. he's a self-proclaimed "gay" who just loves saying that word once too often.. he now responds to the name "Sophia" than "Jun Cheng".. heh! and Medusa is none other than Timothy.. the photographer of the class. I call him Medusa for his hair. It's oily, in clumps and they look like medusa's lil' snakes. oh, and he deliberately had it oily. For if not, I'd be calling him a Frizz-fuzzy head on the days he didn't feel like oiling that frizzy head of his.

Arden is this skinny guy who looks like my cousin, Daryl.. his character resembles daryl so much, I had half the mind of calling him a Daryl-imposter. But obviously I can't, coz arden doesn't know who daryl is.. I think Arden's name is super cool.
Everyone knows who Allison is..she's the parazoa of the class. I think Medusa was really mean of calling her that. But she doesn't really mind it..
oh, then there's Khim. That's just 1/3 of her full name. haha.. her name's KhimGee.. cool name right? it sounds so korean in a way.. she's this slender-sized girl with big eyes and a small sweet face. She ought to go into modelling. she could strike up a deal or something.. And Soek.. that's also 1/3 of her full name. SoekHui's her name, and she's the smallest in class, in terms of physical size. Really petite girl with dyed light brown hair. She's pretty in her own way and just like me, hates wearing tight fitting clothes.. She's also slim and slender too, but keeps saying she's fat. haha.. oh well...

yeah, I guess that should be all for today...


Oh yeah, in French today... it was super fun! for once, French class wasn't such a drag, and the time just passed SO fast without my knowing..
I learnt so much in french today.. :)

And also, for the first time, I felt that Microbiology A lecture was such a slow class, while AK was like speeding like some bullet train. I could absorb everything like I did for Mr Chan's class... it was PERFECT!!! :)

Perhaps fridays aren't that bad after all..
Oh, I still hate physical Chem and Inorganic Chem. someone wanna TRY teaching me about it? I just seem to listen but everything just goes out of my ear once it knocks at the other end..

Well, gotta run..
I gotta try finish my inorganic chemistry report by tonight. That way I won't be so stressed up over the weekend..! :)

I love you guys.. miss you all lots too!! and yeah, there're so many ways of leaving messages here on my blog.. FOUR ways you know.. (okay, maybe that's not alot..) but you have the main TagBoards, the CommentLinks at the end of this entry and any other entry on this page, the GuestMap, and lastly, you can send me E-MAILS... now, how cool is that? :D

I'd like to hear from my readers too.... what? I've got SHY readers ah? tsk tsk... sad sad.. it's okay it's okay.. Don't worry, the big shot here (that's me, obviously) understands. It's perfectly fine if you don't wanna leave a comment.. haha.. Just so long the messages and comments you leave aren't something stupid like "You're an idiot" or "hey, i'm preggers!" or "Hi, i'm the author of this blog" then, i've got no worries over what you post.

okays... time for me to run...
byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees....

2004-07-22

the weekly stuff....

This week on Unconscious Mutterings:

  1. Nostalgia:: times with him
  2. Irreplaceable:: haydern
  3. Odd:: numbers
  4. James Spader:: who?
  5. Flamboyant:: flamango
  6. Intense:: adrenaline, sweatdrops
  7. Simple:: life
  8. Septic:: mind
  9. Ton:: ton-tongue toffees!
  10. Turkey:: thanks giving



And on The Thursday Threesomes:

::If it can go wrong...::

Onesome: If-- Ever hear of that guy Murphy? If you have a story that can add to his legacy, can you share it here?
er.. no, sorry, haven't heard of murphy... heh..


Twosome: it can-- What is it that you can never remember to get correct? Is it which way to turn the wrench to loosen the screw? How about directions to that one restaurant? ...or maybe it's people's names? What is it you call for assistance on?
um.. well, how can you expect me to remember what I always forget? that's rather ridiculous now, isn't it? Oh right, it's that inequality thingh.. how > is smaller that or bigger than, or < is vice versa, i can never tell it apart!


Threesome: go wrong...-- ..and the big finish: what was the last thing you had done so gloriously wrong that all you could do was just stare in awe at the aftermath? I mean, come on, you can tell us...
what have I done so gloriously wrong? um.... lemme see... dissing the meanest teacher in school? yea... guess so.. haha....




i've been busy. yeah. only have time to do all this weekly stuff.. it's the 22nd.. only.. well, only my diary and CERTAIN people know what that date stands for.. hah..
it's top secret.. okay, not quite, but oh, who cares..

anyway, i gotta go sleep now.. toodles...

2004-07-21

blah....

about to DIE here... I seriously haven't got another life outside school man...
let me tell you what happened today in school...
I woke up late at 7.15am... rushed rushed rushed.. but I managed to get out early.. hehe.. (Thank goodness dad wasn't going malaysia for golf today!)

and well, it was raining too.. we had Thermochemistry II for our first lecture.. and then physical chem lab practical.. did some simple simple thingy...
Oh, and I had to take instant photos today.. ugh.. I wasted my money.. didn't know that i had to sit through 4 flashes of light before it's safe to do anything stupid... haha.. it's like so dumb.. I'll try to scan in the pictures when I've got the time, and I'll post intsy sized ones of it up.. haha..

anyway, I've got lots of work to do...
so, gotta run now.. byee...

2004-07-19

headaches...

ugh... mondays are the most boring of days ever in school....
well, besides the sessions with miss eunice, it was a bore..

We had to meet Mr. Jay today, and every one that reads my book (that Genome book), will be interested in it..
Anyways, besides all the running about in school, I had to endure this fucking headache that's been going on since yesterday... ugh....

and i can't sign into that stupid student e-mail thing! This is seriously pissing me off!! >__< :(

ugghh...

whatever.

i'm dying, dying.. disappearing...

This is all so depressing..

I mean, so much homework.. haiz... Tellement tralvail! ma vie est un enfer vivant.. un dieu, aidez moi, s'il vous plait! :( Et j'ai une migraine, il a blessé.. mal.. Ah, comment je souhaite ceci pourrait tout finir maintenant.

haiz... okay, for those who don't speak a word of french, that meant:

So much homework! my life is a living hell.. God, help me, please! :( and I've got a migraine, it hurts.. badly.. Oh, how I wish this could all end now.

yeah...
Anyway, short entry...
still have my mindmap on animalia to do for Eunice again....
haiz... have this fucking headache going on... hurts me so badly.. just wanna cry... haiz..

2004-07-18

grr....

Horoscope for libra, today:
 
You know what's exhausting? Trying to keep up to the minute on a friend's daily dramas. Next time, just smile and nod -- they'll feel like you're listening, and you'll be spared from dealing with the (latest) crisis of the week.

See... even the horoscope's telling me to kick back and not muddle in people's business...
I have loads of homework to do.. I'm not sure what's going on exactly in my life now.. everything's just moving too fast for my own speed.. mom just starting going on and on about how worried she was for my brothers and I and honestly, she was more worried over the older brother than to the younger brother and I. *shrugs* I think, that my parents are spoiling my older brother too much. SERIOUSLY, it's annoying that he gets all the money, and I don't.
 
Anyway, these are some stuff I picked up along at Sosser's blog..
it's the Unconscious Mutterings:
  1. Crippling :: words
  2. Tough :: yeah, just TOUGH...
  3. Slinky :: metal rings
  4. Slogan :: Never say die!
  5. Stuffed :: i'm full..
  6. Instructions :: Do not read instructions, they're misleading.
  7. Expletive :: videos
  8. Cartoon :: network
  9. Toddler :: stanley's lil' brother
  10. Insinuation :: works when you wanna irritate the hell out of the bitch.

This is The Thursday Threesomes:

:: State Fair and Rodeo ::

Onesome -- State:
What state (or Territory) do you live in? Have you lived in any other(s)? Where would you like to live? And as a bonus: Any idea what year your state became a state? *grin*

I live in a STATE COUNTRY...lol.. that's Singapore. nope, never lived in any other state... I'd rather love to live in the state of New South Wales, Australia... it's so much fun there.. and my state country, became what it is today... on 9th August, 1965!! *grins right back*

Twosome -- Fair:
Or amusement parks: Did you enjoy them as a kid? What was your favourite ride? How do you feel about them now? Ready to go wander around one again, sampling funnel cakes and corn dogs and riding rides until you're sick or would you rather just enjoy the entertainment or stay home and avoid the crowds?

I've never been to a full-fledged amusement park. But I went on to a rollercoaster a few times, I loved it! I don't mind going 'bout, wandering around in one again... I wanna ride on an INDOOR-pitch black roller coaster again..

Threesome -- And Rodeo:
Have you ever been to or watched a rodeo on TV? Did you enjoy it or consider it a barbaric spectacle? If you liked it, what was your favourite event? Ever tempted to race barrels or ride a bull yourself?

yeah, I've watched a rodeo on TV... it's rather barbaric, really...but my favourite.. is when the bull throws off the rider... that's so much fun! :D nah... i'm never tempted to race barrels or ride a bull.. that sorta stuff.. i wasnt' made to do those...

And lastly, Friday's Feast:

Appetizer
Make a sentence using the letters of your favorite color. (Example: BLUE - Bob loves using eggs.)
GREEN - Great rains: every evening need. 

Soup
If you were to be stranded on a deserted island and could only have one CD to listen to, which one would you want it to be?
one CD? gods.. um, a mp3-format CD with like over 40 of my most favourite of songs.

Salad
How many people have you kissed in your lifetime?
um... my mom and dad, on their cheeks.

Main Course
Someone offers to give you $2 million, but says you can only have it if you will give half of it to charity. Which good cause would you donate the $1 million to?
um... the society of special needs. they need more facilities.. 

Dessert
What would you like to name your next pet?
my next pet.. Trouble. or Sweets. yep.. sweets...

 

Oh yeah, mom bought me a new watch.. it's only 9$ so what the heck. It's this nice green colour.. and yeah, it looks pretty much like the green I just displayed. I shall wear it to school on monday... :D hahhaa.. just to show mom how much I like it!
Anyway, I was saying earlier, I have no clue to what's going on around me nowadays.. I have to admit, I'm rather oblivious to what goes about.. it's bad, I know.. but all I'm concerned about nowadays would be my studies, my after-school activities, Terra and haydern.. I mean, I see debra and rica practically everyday in my life... so naturally, I think I knew what was going on. But apparently not so... I dunno.. I feel that soon, I'm gonna drift away from them, coz rica and debra would be going to church together often, spending more time together without me, coz I'm non-christian. Seriously, I dont' like the idea of going to church and all that.. it's just not it, you know? I mean, tell me; give me a SOLID reason and arguement: How can going to church even allow you to gain knowledge of something that most people don't even spend any time of understanding it, by ONLY leaving ONE day of the week to understand it, when you can always use your bible as a bed-time story book and read it whenever you want during the weekdays?

Seriously, I don't see how you can understand that, debra, rica... it's totally non-sensical to do that. I dont know.. it's just non-sensical to me. You're both probably glaring, rolling your eyes at me and doing that annoyed sigh. I don't know.. maybe it's just my bad luck with OTHER christians.. they've betrayed me too much by preaching me too much on christianity... so whatever it is, i'm sensitive over this subject on your religion.. don't try to even CONVERT me, alright? i'm putting that line really clear to you two.. don't even TRY converting me... it'll be useless. I'd rather be religion-free.. and really, I dunno.. you're going "whenever did we want to convert you?"  you have, you've been indirectly doing so, and I don't like it, okay?

ugh... end of discussion.

i'm getting depressed and pissed off over this matter. I know you'd be pissed off at me to what i'm about to say, but to HELL with religions, there's no such thing as ONE religion or THE religion, or THE god. so there.

 

i'm off to do my reports.





par-tay, par-tay!!!

it's Rica's pre-birthday celebrations today!!!! honestly, and REALLY frankly, I'd rather stay home to catch up on my sleep.. but it's RICA's birthday, I HAVE to go... I CANNOT miss out on my BEST FRIEND'S 18th birthday!!!
it's outrageous if I did that! (miss her birthday, that is)
 
Anyway, I haven't been blogging much..
Let me re-cap abit of stuff to keep everyone else updated.... hahaha.... (I'm a popular girl, so have to let my 'fans' know about what goes on, right? *winkz*)
 
muahaha.. okay okay...
anyway, Wednesday evening, I went back to school for viola.. I met up with soek, arden, ian, ghim hock, allison, peisuan, ee ren and khim... back at Food Junction's... to get my rackets back.. I have this feeling that those two badminton rackets are gonna have a permanent place in peisuan's locker.. hahaha.. well, I don't mind getting a locker for myself.. but it's a little expensive, I'm not sure if mom would allow it... trust me, whenever I use a locker, no one else's stuff gets to get in... :S It's a proven fact on that... I make VERY good use of lockers ALL the time. ;-)
 
Okay, well, viola on wednesday evening was... boring.. really. I was learning how to play those supporting notes of "Baa baa black sheep" and "Twinkle twinkle little stars". Lame, I know. Quit laughing! I HAD to start from SOME where, right?  I seriously need more practice...
 
When I got to school on Thursday.. Early, in fact.. To become the week's lab assistant, I was told that I needn't take stock of the stuff we were to use for the day's microbiology A practicals.. dammit.. make me wake up early.. haiz.. nvm nvm.. hahaha.. I had fun in microbio A pracs anyway.. During lunch or something, Eric was telling me that I was such a "pang seh"  (let down) hahah.. only coz I ran off home to SLEEP while the others were at the sports hall... hahaha.. I told him I was exhausted and if it means to go home to sleep for a while, I'd do that just to be rejuvenated.. He grinned and shook his head, plopped into a seat and listened to his radio..
 
Thursday, is rubbish day.. but Physical Chemistry was such an anti-climax in ending school day... that mr bakar is so boring..... really.. I wish I could put some life into him...he is SOOOOOO dull.. what a slacker in that way... ugh.
 
Friday, (which was yesterday) was like... okay, it was boring too... it was like so dull.. it was so... I don't know..
Routined? yeah.. it was routined.. wake up, freshen up, go to class.. oh, I was SUPER early today.. so I messaged Kumaran.. he asked for me to go down to the atrium to meet up  with him. I said okay, coz I was stuck upstairs in block Q and no one was around ( I reached NYP at like frigging 8.20am)...
I met Tim and Allison at the atrium.. haha.. tim likes calling allison "Empty Vessel" hhehehe... goodness... :-P
It's funny watching allison fume and tim go laughing his retarded laugh.. I call Tim the flower destroyer/spastic monkey. coz HE destroyed this really nice balloon flower that Eunice gave me for having done a good mindmap on plants and I wanted to post it over to australia to haydern.. that IDIOT tim just HAD to destroy it... AND he looks like a spastic monkey when he laughs... heh..
well, the thing to spice up the day would be the last lesson of the week, I2MB lecture.. Eunice was telling us about the PARAZOA and it's unique characteristics.. When Timothy heard what the charateristics were, he started laughing his spastic laugh again! hahaa.. the Parazoa is this one-cell thick round ball called a blastospore.. and inside this blastospore, it's totally hollow..
 
hollow = empty.
Empty = allison.
And to Tim, Allison = empty vessel.
therefore,  Allison =  Parazoa.
 
hehehe.. that's why tim started laughing at allison.. luckily eunice didn't hear tim's laugh...
 
Oh, and during microbio A lecture, allison thought that this picture of a swollen penis was actually BREAD.. I mean, we couldn't see that it was a penis (with boils and pus), coz it was a photocopied set of lecture notes, and well, it was soooo hilarious when Arden shouted out "Allison thinks it's BREAD!!" to AK when AK told us that it was actually a picture of a human's penis..
 
and earlier on, still during microbio A lecture.. Shakeila was exclaiming that penicillium in the petri dish holding the penicillium bacteria and agar "looks like Bao!!" hahaha... AK was like "0406 ah... you guys think only of food is it?" well, he didnt' say that out loud, but I can guess that's the exact thing running through his head.. hurhurhur... He told the whole lecture theatre that it was the first time he heard someone say that penicillium actually looked like a pastry.. hahaha.. well, it DID look like one... hahaha....
 
Well, today is Saturday.
I'm going out to meet Serica and Debra at 2pm.. Mom's trying to fix the light in the kitchen.. she's good at stuff like that.. i thought Dads are the ones doing the electrical stuff.. but in my family, it ends up mom knows how to do those kinda stuff... and Dad knows the more complex stuff like looking at the stock markets and reading complex financial reports that i have no idea to what they're trying to put across with all those figures running all over the place..
 
Anyway, we're gonna celebrate rica's birthday.. like I've said.. I haven't bought her anything.. not that I need to buy her anything, coz she owes me cash.. i'll just get her this cute lil' handphone keychain thingy along the way.. she's going into christianity.. not that I don't approve of it, it's her decision to make.. but I just don't like the constipated look when they do Praise and Worship sessions. It's a common thing around the world for that to happen, you know? While I was in Lausanne, Switzerland, I so happened to switch over to this Christian channel. I switched the language to English, so that I could listen to everything in English. it's freaky. I mean, no offence... I know when a person is in church, any kind of church, temple, whatever.. the first most important common respect to do is to pay all attention to "God" and what not.. but being MADE a HUMAN with curious instincts, let me tell you, as a non-christian in a christian church (or non-catholic in a catholic church and vice versa), some people (very much like me) have this tendency to stop, look around and OBSERVE my surroundings. And I so happen have to see constipated looks.. And it's like the most hideous of sights that I've ever seen on such a HUGE crowd of people...
 
I still think.. that it doesn't matter that you don't go to church often like the others, you don't have to have an alter to say your prayers, so long as you're alive and on this Earth, this place would be God's sanctuary for you to live and love on. Nevermind, I'm not being very clear on this paragraph. Perhaps when I get home tonight, I will then tell you more of what I think a TRUE disciple of God should be.. (not that I'm qualified, but it's just MY opinion..)
 
Till then, I really have to run now....
i'm like SUPER late!!!! *sheepish grin*
 
will update you all laters...
byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....

2004-07-17

larh deee darh..... haiz....

okays, I got this from peisuan's blog... i think her blog's cooool.. but the colours are kinda bright.. hurt my eyes quite the bit... but all just to understand my friend better, I will tolerate the bright colours and read on... anyway, these are MY answers.. yeah.. lol..
 
--LAST PERSON WHOx.
Slept in your bed other than you: no one.. my bed's only for me, myself and I..
Saw you cry: the computer
Made you cry: haydern
Spent the night with: ninah, bra and rica
You shared a drink with: hmm.. ninah's and bra's..
You went to the movies with: with gary
You went to the mall with: by myself
Sent you an email: Charmaine, my 'mei mei'... :D
You kissed: my cat, Terra.
Called you: mom
IMed you: debra
Stepped on your foot: debra
Bullied u: DEBRA again!!
Bullied by u: muahaha... i got my revenge!! I bullied ALL three... debra, ninah and serica!! ^-^
 
--HAVE YOU EVER...x.
Said "I Love You" and meant it?:  YES.. AND I STILL LOVE YOU HAYDERN!
Gotten in a fight with your pet: ugh..so many times! MOM, I DON BULLY TERRA!! SHE ABUSES ME!!! >__<
Danced naked: nope
Dreamed something really crazy and then it happened the next day: uhh.. yeah.. dreamt that my best friend would die the day after and she really did...
Wish you were the opposite sex: yes...
Had an imaginary friend:  yes..
Things you like in a girl/guy:  oh yeah.. i want haydern. only him.. muahha.. so sad lah.. haiz...
Do you have a crush on someone: no crush, i love him
What book are you reading now: er... "Genome" by Matt Ridley. (Jezz, you must be so proud)
Worst feeling in the world: of disappointment, sadness, heartbreak. it leads to lonliness
What is the first thing you think when you wake up: 'can i go back to sleep?'
What's under your bed: books, notes, stuff
Favorite sport to watch: snowboarding
Current Age: 17 yrs 9 months
Siblings:  two brothers (one older, one younger)
Location: singapore?
College plans: i'm done with college.. i'm aiming university..
Boyfriend/Girlfriend: haiz.. skipping this, coz even i'm confused on this matter
 
--EXTRA STUFFx.
Do you do drugs:  no
Do you drink: yes. loads.
What are you most scared of: i'm scared of what happens in life
What clothes do you sleep in: t-shirt, shorts
Where do you want to get married: in mauritus
Who do you really hate:  my aunts! FUCK YOU BITCHES!!! I HATE YOU FOR BEING YOU!!!!
What type automobile do you drive: i don't drive, people drive me about!
Do you have a job: yeah, i'm a student, and that's my job.
Do you like being around people: yeah, guess so...
 
--STUFFx.
Have you ever loved someone you had no chance to tell them: haiz... yes... he doesn't wanna listen.. he doesnt' want to know..
Have you ever cried over something someone of the opposite sex did: yes.. so many times..
Do you have a "type" of person you always go after: 'type'? only the Haydern type..
Want someone you don't have right now: yea.. badly too..
Are you lonely right now: right now.. yes.. very..
Ever afraid you'll never get married: yeah.. actually, no him, no marraige? dunno... that sounded immature.. but that's just me..
Do you want to get married:  YES... i most definitely wanna get married.. haha..
Do you want kids: yes! they're soooo adorable!
 
--FAVOURITEx.
Room in house: my room
Type(s) of music: stuff from Lamb... those new songs on the radio... stuff like that.. i hate techno...
Color: pastel colours..bold, cheerful colours...
Perfume or cologne:  Giorgio Armani's "night -- for women"
Month:  october, my birthday..
Stone: diamonds
Animal: dogs
 
--IN THE LAST 48 HOURS, HAVE YOU...
Cried: nope
Bought something: yes. food...
Gotten sick: yes..
Sang: yeah
Said "I Love You":  nope
Met someone new:  no
Moved on: no
Talked to someone: yeah, to mom, over the phone, before she picked me up from rica's
Missed someone:  YES...i miss him.. *sobs* ninah brought up the subject of him.. and i was thinking of him ever since and i miss him so much... him = haydern, like d'uh.. hahahaha...
Hugged someone: yeah.. ninah, debra and rica
Kissed someone: my cat
Fought with your parents:nope
 
 
 
anyway... today was okay... i was tired out sooo fast.... debra was still laughing away loudly.. i think she was drunk or sumfink... can't be really bothered....
you know, if I were to classify and label each and every of my classmates, you'd call me an evil, nasty and extremely rude child.. but *shrugs* i'm not about to do that.. so I won't be evil, nasty and extremely rude...
 
i'm tired... *yawns*
well... good night....
bon nuit....

2004-07-14

*yawns*

This workload of mine is certainly NEVER ending, I must stress on that.. (not that i'm not stressed up enough)
I look horrid. I've got REALLY dark eyebags, coffee don't keep me away, it just makes me sleep and gives me stomach problems later. and no, I've not tried supplements. (simply coz i can't find them, and i'm too busy to go searching for it)

While classes are indeed interesting, everyday I learn at least 25 new things, but it's the homework that keeps piling in.. I'm glad I did a DETAILED mindmap on Intro to Molecular Biotech (I2MB) for eunice tan.... hahaha.. she gave me this really nice balloon flower. but that spastic moron Timothy had to go deflate it for me... blardy kuku.... you'll pay for that, you moron!! *grumbles mumbles* and he laughs at the balloon whenever he sees it.. or sees me for that fact.

Well, the class is stuck at the sports facility/faculty hall playing badminton again.. I told them if I weren't going home, then I'll be doing my Physical Chemistry Tutorial one homework.. I better get doing those 7 long questions.. tomorrow have to pass up.. ah fuck. I have my microbio A homework to do as well.. i'm dead.. today's SE Practice will be a short one hour one.. heh.. haiz.. i hate it when i have undone homework. okay, tomorrow i'll do my inorg chem and physical chem one after the microbio A pracs..

uggghhh... can die lah... so busy...
haiz... *shrugs* guess like what peisuan says, "just gotta get used to it and down it all...."

In comm skills and tech. writing today, we had to form groups of 3 or 4... mrs lau, our teacher, allowed me to have a group of 5.. it'll be me, allison, peisuan, kumaran and ee ren. I don't know what topic we've gotta do, but I hope we can do something like Genetic Diseases, or Birth Defects (Causes and suggested productions to cure it)...
yeah, sounds interesting? ahhh... yeah... otherwise the other one we could do be like Gene Mutations.. it's really fun.. hahah.. but most gene mutations are being kept top secret.. so yeah, i'm not sure either..

okay, I gotta go now.. will blog some other day..
too-deh-lay-doos... hahaha....

byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...

2004-07-13

more crappy days to go...

heh.. alright man... today was like... so hilarious!
I don't know how to describe it.. monday night I came home exhausted from SE Practice, had my 6 hours of sleep and then I woke up at 8am..

Well, while I was stepping out of my house, Clement called to ask where I was.. he thought French started at 8am!!! hahah!!! poor fella!!! clement, clement, french classes on TUESDAYS start at TEN.. poor guy.. hahah.. wake up for nothing..

Anyway, I became Lab Assistant today.. had to take stock of all the glass wear and all that.. and that VS guy, Jun Cheng.. blardy bugger destroyed a measuring cylinder! haha.. j/k, j/k... it was purely accidental, I know.. ;) but poor guy, have to pay for something he didn't do directly. but since it was alloted at his work bench, he had to pay for it.. Inorg. chem practice was really fun today. we did titration tests.. well, this means I'll have more lab reports to do.. (it's a weekly thing, 3 reports to hand in per week.) it's a nightmare, but I have to get used to it.. haha...

hmm.. oh right.. ian and tim got busted today.. I don't know what's gonna happen to them.. they tried sneaking into the sports facaulty hall with one pass instead of two.. I hope it's nothing harsh. Tim forgot his lanyard and metriculation card PLUS ez-link today.. I think he's using cash to get around by transport today..and like I said, we were having class bonding this afternoon. Playing badminton. We'll have to do more of those soon.. perhaps I'll do that with kumaran on monday afternoons when I've got like 6 hours to spare.. :S

Reminds me, I have a mindmap (summary) on Plants for intro to mole. biotech to hand in tomorrow to eunice tan (lecturer)... plus my physical chem lab report too.. I still have one last question to do... Not that I hate school now.. haha.. i don't think i'll hate it.. why make myself hate school when I can look at it in other directions and enjoy it. Sure, I meet some odd people, some nasty ones.. but yeah.. they're likable someway or another, yeah? I guess I'm not all that sane too. No one in MB is, really. We're a bunch of "I like the nerd look" people who can be really stupid sometimes.

Oh yeah, I went off topic.. (as usual)

As I was saying, tim and ian got busted.. we're gonna see what's gonna happen to the two of them and what can be done to stop anything from getting any worse.. it's only second week of school and we're causing havoc.. woooooow.. nice on the records.. hahha.. I seem to realise I always go to the bravest of classes. We dare to fulfil the term of "Rules are meant to be broken"... don't we? I know, it's not exactly good, but it's only in this way do we dare to dream of doing big things. Alright! keep it up guys.. we have lots of rules in the world of science to break through to find the ULTIMATE genome and whatnot! :D (okay, i KNOW i'm talking rubbish here..)

Anyway, I walked out of the hall at 3.30pm when Bra called me to ask where I was.. seriously, I took like 15 minutes to walk from the hall to block A. and I'll tell you why...

I had a leg cramp.

SERIOUS!! Stop giving me that sinister, maniac grin! don't you dare laugh Bra, you spastic dotted cow! TB-infected colon spotted zebra.. constipated giraffe... (-__-'')

Well, bra and I finally got to see rica!!! FINALLY!!! AFTER TWO WEEKS!! yes, I DID miss rica.. hahaha.. she's finally ENJOYING school life... honestly, rica, that amanda girl, she's just plain selfish. I've read her blog.. seriously, she sounds depressed. acts as if the whole world owes her a living... she ought to shut up, wake up and a good look about...

anyway, rica, bra and i crapped like crazy just now.. :D it was super fun! clearly, I've been cheered up a whole lot.. doing up all my homework just to meet up with BOTH my best friends certainly IS worth it!! hahahaha.. spending time with the class first and then with my best friends, that's the best thing ever, really. and it includes both classmates, AND best friends being happy! haha.. really, no one person can be sad while with me.. haha.. they end up laughing somehow! :)

well, i have my microbio A lab report to finish up, and that summary mindmap thing.. oi, bra, rica, sorry i can't blog over at Crappers'.. i'll do that like friday night, okay? hahhaa.. byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee for nowwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!

WHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!

*does a quick victory dance*

woo hoo!!! one report down, and another major one to go!!! :S *grimaces* Homework is a never-ending storybook in any person's schooling life.. :) but it's the only thing that keeps me busy and thinking of people.. although haydern just CREEEEEPS into my head allll the time for some weird reason.. hahaha.. he's hard not to think of..

anyway, I got home at 9pm today.. heh heh heh.. I had String Ensemble practice today.. well, it's more like "Beginners class".. I was ordered to play open strings for 2 hours solid, to pull the bow at certain angles at the same time, while keeping in mind of the way I hold the bow, and my body and neck positions, also the tune of the sound being produced. It had to be a "Clear, continuous flow of the same note. no screeches, no pauses, no travelling of the bow from left to right, only up and down." Let me tell you, after ONE hour, I got tired of listening of the same monotenous 4 notes being repeated in the same sequence, so I started playing it like 1st, 3rd, 2nd, 4th.. or 4th, 2nd, 1st, 3rd... different renditions and all that.. I got tired after 15 minutes, and decided to try out the frets.. hahaha..

Gim Ann (string ensemble president) was teaching me and my other viola partner, wendy (from School of health sciences) the proper techniques. Later on, Joshua came by for his practice session, and he took over from there for about 15 minutes.. (Joshua's SE's QuarterMaster and the ONLY guy playing the viola) he reminds me of Eugene.. hahaha.. there's another guy in yr 2 in SCL who reminds me of eugene as well.. dunno... i happen to see so many eugene lookalikes recently.. haha! :P

anyway, they said I was getting really good at pulling that damn bow.. (who wouldn't after 2 hours) but anyways, hahha.. by 8pm, I finally crashed and gave up pulling that bow up and down, I was tired of sticking my eyes only at 4 metal strings and a moving bow at the left side of my shoulder!! hahahah... I packed up and put back the violas (with wendy's too) back to the proper place, grabbed my bag, said goodbye to my ensemble mates and yumei (my classmate) and told gim ann that i was outta there.. haha...

when I got home, well... homework homework homework!! I finally got a hang at what a report was supposed to look like (I took PeiSuan's one as a rough guide) and personalised my own lab report for physical chemistry. Oh, Jezzie kor ah.. I need help with inorg chem badly!!! *sobs* i can't understand stoichiometry!!!!(spelling not right, i'm guessing)

Junie, wanna give me a hand at it? Someone save me already! teach me some inorg. chem!! the damn cheena "google" fella CAN'T TEACH!!! sob sob sob.....
anyway, he was showing us the video clips on doing titrations.. I have no idea what the videos were mumbling about.. I have inorg. chem. practicals later at 12-2pm.. so, yeah, I think I'm gonna really die if ee ren doesn't help me or if we have to do individual stuff.. ugh.. eeks! so scary! what if i blow it up? damn.. uhhhhhh.... hahhaha....


well, tomorrow will certainly be busy.
I will have to go book the badminton courts, and then, the class will be having this badminton fiesta straight away after school, from 2-4... but I will only stay from 2-3.20pm... coz I gotta run off to meet up with debbie and rica at Esplanade to have a get-together. I MISS RICA!!!! hahaha.. yes, i really do.. haven't seen the girl in TWO weeks!! can you BELIEVE THAT??? previously, we'd meet like twice a week! now it's once in a fortnight! this is baaaaad... haiz...

anyway, we'll be at the Esplanade library.. till about 7pm.. i hope uncle philip can give us a ride home.. or i'll be really pooped when I get back home. And there's still physical chem worksheet to do. Plus all the CMS (Course management system).. jialat jialat... hahah... okay, well, time to say bon nuit! i gotta go sleep now.. au revoir!!!

byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.... i 'll update whenever i'm not too tired and if i've got the time...

2004-07-11

Lyrics!!!

Let's go insane with lyrics for this moment... ;)

Atomic Kitten ~*~ Someone like Me

Don't let your head rule your heart
Don't let your world be torn apart
Don't keep it all to yourself
Just let all your emotions run free
With someone like me
Thats the way it should be
Someone like me

I know it's hard
When your feelin' down
To lift your feet up off the ground
We make mistakes
But doesn't everybody
You don't always have
To agree with someone like me
Thats the way it should be
someone like me

We know the story so far
(What you want and who you are)
What you want and who you are(free)
Let all your emotions run free
You don't always have to agree
With someone like me
That's the way it should be
Someone like me
Someone like me


Avril Lavigne ~*~ Take me Away

I cannot find a way to describe it
It's there inside
All I do is hide
I wish that it would just go away
What would you do
You do if you knew
What would you do

Chorus
All the pain
I thought I knew
All the thoughts lead back to you
Back to what
Was never said
Back and forward
Inside my head
I can't handle this confusion
I'm unable
come and take me away


I feel like I'm all alone
All by myself I need to get around this
My words are cold
I don't want them to hurt you
If I show you
I don't think you'd understand
'Cause no one understands

Chorus

I'm going nowhere on and on and
I'm getting nowhere on and on and on
I'm going nowhere on and on and off and on and off and on

Chorus

Take me away
Break me away
Take me away



Oh gawds you know what? NYPSO has got to be the best thing ever that's happened since I called Shakeila... hahaha.. I got to play the viola! the instrument I've been wanting to play for so long! I love the sound of the violin, mind you, and I'd love to play in Violin II, but so many people are in Violin II already, so common.. so I thought I'd play the viola instead.. so cool.. it's got this lower pitch compared to the violin, but higher than the cello.. :D it's sweet!
but it's such a pity.. I won't be with allison, pei suan, ian and ee ren... they're all in the BAND section... haiz... *slumped shoulders*

Anyway, when I get good enough, I'll be in the performing orchestra's group and I will be playing with allison and the rest.. (yay!!! :D) hehehe... but i'll be like in the third row or sumfink like that.. coz as the viola, we're not really needed you see...
This year's intake for the strings is relatively huge though.. that's what Gim Ann, the strings ensemble president told me.. haha.. I do hope I can become the string ensemble someday.. it'll be cool.. and i'll make them learn how to play "Clair de Lune".. it's a piece composed by Debussy. I think it's really classy.. ;)

Yeah, well.. orientations ended at like 11.30am earlier on saturday, but I stayed on till about 1.30pm... with wendy, my other viola partner. she's 19 this year. she's in SHS doing Diagnostic Theraphy.. she used to go to SRJC..

Well, terra had another "scratch-and-gnaw-the-mistress" fest with me again just now.. :S *shrugs* Gary made her wild. that ass is always making people getting angry at him for some sick wacko reason that even HE doesn't know of..

ugh.. i have so much Math and science to do... and those two lab reports are no where near done... *depressed sigh* okay, tomorrow, I'm going to FORCE myself to do my homework..

OOOH!!!! and S.E. practice starts monday! this is soooo cool... my Section Leader's this guy called Joseph.. he's the only guy playing the viola. So, he calls all of us girls, his 'wives'... hahaha.. funny fella.. he's from SIT as well. in 3rd this year..


okays, I gotta go now.. need to do some math.. then head to bed... or else my mom will skin me alive again... haiz... somebody, save me...

2004-07-09

one thing off my back, c'est la vie!!!

awright!!! What I thought would end up to be a bad nasty week in first week of school... ended up pretty well! :D this isn't all that as horrid as I thought it would actually be...

hahhaa... yeah, i had this bad misunderstanding with a class mate, Shakeila... but we made up so we're all cool now.. hahaha.. that's really great.. maybe now I can concentrate on doing my lab reports.... they're so so tough! And you know what? I'm trying to psych myself to do this "I love maths! math is FUN!!!" heh.. gods.. i'm going mad here.... hahahhaa

alright alright...
I gotta go do my homework.. 2 lab reports, and math, and physical chem and inorg chem and dunno what microbio A and intro to molecular biotech stuff to do... haiz... jia latz...

kkkk... byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...

2004-07-08

another quick entry...

hahhahaa...
allison said nice things on the first day of school.. Ian reminded me of that while I was reading his blog just now...

"Friends are the chocolate chips in our cookie lives.." hahah.. now, there's a good one, allison! oh, allison's adopted french name was this really cute one... it's Aurelie.. but she didn't know how to pronounce it, (i recommended Claire, but she wanted a "A" name..) so she told Mr Tse, "I want that name before the 'orh-hor' one.." hahahah! :D my goodness.. the entire class was laughing away!

oh, yeah, allison, I'd agree... SO much homework! Third day of school and they're killing me.. I wonder how Aisha and Melvin coped with all that shit man... haiz.. I guess we'll have to start pedalling real hard if we wanna catch up..! 0405 are ahead in inorg. chem... that stoopid 'gooooogle' guy.. sheesh!

Haha.. actually, I'm not supposed to be blogging this, but I couldn't help it! I HAVE to type in something that screams "ANGELINE'S THOUGHTS ONLY!!!" so yeah.. hahas! *grins*

Oh man, I desperately want the CCAs to start so that I can kick off into the full poly mode! this is gonna be so much like secondary school without the uniforms...
Really, in secondary school, we had to do 30% self studies, and 70% teacher teach.. the teachers would be like "okay, read your books from page this to page that. we're gonna have Q&A after that" then after that whatever thing we don't know, we ask and they'll answer.. very much like poly, right?

some more, I had the home rule system.. and well... i think NYP canteen food's so expensive. Today's (Thursday) two hour break.. it's just snacks for me.. gotta slim down lah.. hurhurhur...

Anyway, okay, today.. haiz...it's 4 classes.
oh shit, I just remembered that physical chemistry tutorial's just up later.. and I haven't finished that last question... ugh... dunno when he meant "next week" in his tutorial, was it THIS week, or really NEXT week.. teachers are so decieving sometimes..

Oh, I think Mr Jay's really cool.. hahah.. he's so cheerful and all that! :D cool right?

hahaha... oh, I gotta run now..
go finish up my phys. chemistry then gotta go seh-leeep...
I haven't been feeling well the whole of yesterday.. was having giddy spells ever since I woke up.. like when I'm sooo drunk everything's spinning, kinda thing.... hahaha.. well, toodles for now..... byeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.....

2004-07-07

gotta make this a quickie

coz I have LOTS of homework to do today..
the teacher just loaded us with stuff I don't even understand at all...
except for physical chemistry that is.. even then.. I have no idea what part C. of today's experiment was talking about..

oh, today, Comm. skills & Technical writing, was the most relaxing and wonderful class! the lecturer (who's our tutor too) was really great.. she's fantastic..
and then we could go off at like an hour earlier.. that kinda thing.. cool right? :D

we went to club crawl again, and I got to see the NYPSO perform!! It was TERRIFIC!!!! :D
I'm glad I joined the orchestra... hahaha... they've got a 'welcome party' this saturday @ 9am...
I bought my French textbook... cost me $27!!! sho expensive... haiz.... -_-||
oh... there're six of us in class who're in NYPSO... haha.. me, allison, ian, ee ren, pei suan and yumei... this will be sooo cool! :D and if dominic and clement joins, it'll be EIGHT of us! ;) awright...

hahah...
okay, well, I gotta go do my homework now..
I've got E-learning homework (all modules) and stuff to hand in from there.. and then a lab report to write and hand in.. gotta try to finish it early, so that I can gain extra favour and marks from Ms Yong.. kewl! :D

byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

2004-07-06

tomorrow, lesson's would only end at 3pm... what a drag..
it'll be at 5 on thursdays, and 6 on fridays...

oh and i joined NYAA, NYP Pals, NYPSO and SCL(LS) club...
NYPSO is the NYP Symphonic Orchestra.. they're having this 'Welcome to NYPSO' Party at 9am on this saturday... and their practices are like on tuesday and thursday NIGHTS... whahahs... :P cool huh?

As for NYP pals, do you know that the majority of the SCL students joined that club? hahahha.. hope i get in.. it's like the coolest club EVER! :D

NYAA, is simply National Youth Achievement Award.. it's this 18 month duration award where I have to complete FIVE categories during which or maybe more till I reach 25... my class joined..I persuaded like 5 of them to join NYP Pals and NYAA... hur hur hur hur hur.... oh and the last club...

SCL(LS) Club. It's the school's committee club.. like the student council club... it's cool... hahaha... coz the school's coolest people are within this group.. it's a pity it's only two people per class... haiz... nevermind.. hahahah....

I'm gonna make my poly life MY time.. and I'm gonna make sure they remember my name.. hahaha.. At least Das-ty from SJC remembers me.. hahaha... oh.. I actually signed up for Tennis and fusion dance...! dunno what spurred me to take those...

anyway, class today was to say the least, interesting... french was boring, but in a way captivating... so was the practical for inorganic chem.... hahaha... *shrugs*

yup yup... well, I gotta get going now... hahahas....
byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees

good morning to one and all....

yeah, today is one of those RARE days where I get to post in the mornings... really, the other times would be over the weekends... coz class doesn't start till 10 o'clock for me on tuesdays this semester.. hur hur hur hur hur.... *smirks*

well other than that... you'd never hear from me till I get back home in the afternoons or evenings... when I'm all exhausted and all I can go "huh?" and blog something really stupid and irrevalent..

anyway, Club Crawl starts today. while i'm still in class!!! uggghhh... I just hope NYP Pals would have some space left when I get there... I'm taking either kayaking or fusion dance.. I don't know what purpose kayaking would offer me, just that I'd get super dark, which is something that I wouldn't want! >__< (I lurve muh fair skin)

Buuuuuut anyway, yeah, we'll see what sports activity I can get into, yeah? I do hope to get a good club! wish me luck, all of you, alright?

okays, I gotta go now..
if not i'll be late for school.. heh heh heh.... byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees...... i'll update tonight!

2004-07-05

tired...

yeah.... school was okay.. I went to school, saw my new classmates and I was instantly charged up for my lectures...

hahah.. oh! i'm in my school's club!! This is really great! Gary told me to look out for this position.. so yeah, I took it the moment kaelash asked about who was interested. this is superb...

anyway, not much being taught today.
just that whole thing about inorganic chem... that fella (lecturer) he was like "blah blah blah blah blah blah blah, so therefore, blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.... then, blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah... and so you get blah blah blah blah blah... okay? can understand? blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.... okay, class is over, you can go off now.."

so so soooo boring!
but nonetheless, enriching? hahaha...

well, I met my lecturer and tutor for Molecular Biotechnology.. her name's Eunice. really cool and nice teacher! :D strict, but yeah... hahaha....

oh yeah, tomorrow's club crawl.. i'm gonna join NYP pals.. and fusion dance... hahaha... dunno about photography.. haven't got the money... *shrugs* it'll just be an EXTRA extra activity for me.. hahha...

okay, I gotta run now... can't think of anything to type out now...
i'm so tired... i need some sleep.....

Insomnia...

(rant session) whahahas..
while all my friends are in bed sleeping, or getting ready for bed.. well, i AM ready to get into bed, but I can't sleep as of yet..

Insomnia, has strike, yet again.
Anyway, Tim's joining biking, photography and kendo... whahahas...
then, soek.. dunno what she's gonna join, maybe the fusion dance company..
kumaran's gonna be in La Hex'agone.. i think that's how it's spelled. it's the french club anyways.
ian ah ian.. dunno leh.. hahahha.. i forgot what he said he wanted to join..

As for me..i've got lots.. NYP Pals, that's for sure.. and um.. i'm thinking photography too.. and maybe a sports group.. kayaking perhaps.. hehe.. or watersports group.. fusion dance group too... at the same time do NYAA lah.. might as well.. hahahs...

believe it or not, I just gave myself a hug.. hahahhaa... >__< well, I'm bored lah.. and I needed a hug, so SELF HUG!!!! muahaha.. okay, i'm insane.
awww... crap! terra was using my hand as her teeth-sharpening thingy again! :S later go school sure kena asked about it again.. hahahs... it's pretty morbid looking you know..
one of the scratches are bleeding a little..

Today, will be the day school FINALLY starts!!! hahaha.. I've been waiting for this day for SEVEN months!!! LONGEST vacation EVER!!! sweet! heh heh.. oh, I do hope to get that scholarship thingy... if i do, it's a free $3000 going into my bank and I'm keeping it there forever! Well, till I go to university that is.. muahaha...

Anyway, a quickie poem thingy..
haha.. here goes.. (it's really spur of the moment thing)

Insomnia, ever a close friend..
you're the only one who understands me,
who knows my troubles, and gives me the will to understand..
that not everything goes along as planned,
but it also means that to see everything through,
that's the secret of it all..

Insomnia, so close to my skin..
you live within my mind,
stretching minutes into hours,
the walk along my life a thousand times longer..
But you taught me,
with patience, I will get what I want,
what I need,
what I wish,
what I truly desire.

By the time you leave me for another vacation,
insomnia, i will finally see the light of life..
and then i will get what I want,
what I need,
wish,
and truly desire..

Sleep.


whahaha... what? you expected something like "the love of my life" and all that crap? NO WAY.. hahhaa... it'll spoil the whole poem! i want sleep.. i need sleep.. i wish for sleep... i desire for sleep........! why?
coz when I can get my sleep... I can forget everything! hahaha... I can put EVERYTHING aside and get some rest.

A good rest when I am truly exhausted.. now, that's when I can sleep and not be bothered
with people nagging at me, scolding me.. it's like some up down left right centre thing.. Did I say earlier?
well, on the left, i have junie calling me silly for even thinking of letting go.. but in a nice way of course. on the right, i have debra screaming at me to "DONT THINK SO MUCH CAN!?!?!?!" up and down, my parents and other adults nagging at me over so many other things.. "stop spending money" "stop going out with your friends" "stop using the computer so much" "stop squinting your eyes" "stop playing with the cat" stop this, stop that. hello!?? my friends took my money from me, i can't help that! well, I HAVE to go out with my friends, I need to talk to them! the computer's the only other form of communication that's cheap... and you're gonna make me blind soon if i don't squint.. the cat's got no one to play with, so she found me, that's why I'm playing with her! uggghh...

then it's no better with my boyfriend telling me i'm stupid and dumb and silly and i'm doing myself a fucking HUGE disfavor to myself coz I wanna hold on to him. Can't he like fucking see he's not a fucking burden to me? and can't he like fucking understand that I am in NO FUCKING WAY gonna just up and outta here? uuuuggggghhhh.... MEN ARE STUPID FUCKING DUMB RETARDS WHO NEED PEOPLE LIKE MEEEEEEE TO WAKE THEIR FUCKING DUMB MINDS UP!!!!!! okay, maybe not. but maybe just the pissed off me, yah, HE needs that, doesn't he? You know, I prolly should bitch about this to him, but I haven't got the energy to do that right now. SOOOOOOO FUCKING ANNOYED..... oooooOOOOoooOOOOhhhh..... ugh. *whacks head on wall* you...this frigging fabio haydern rodriguez.. you ass.... driving me NUTS really INSANE over you... grrr...

UGH!! so sickening! You know, I really love him.. but he's getting on my nerves being such an ASS over all this shit.. I know it's a bloody terminal illness that MIGHT kill virtually EVERYONE.. but god dammit! ugh... he's annoying when he keeps pushing me away like that!


ugggggghhhhhh...... when I get to school... i WILL enjoy my day... it WILL be good, everyone would be smiling and being cheerful. I WILL smile and be cheerful. UGGGGHHH.... I have to PSYCHO myself for school. like hell. ugh...

I'm cursing way too much. ugh................ this is soooo bad. Nasty me is coming back. hehs.... sacarsm, hellooooo sacarsm.

night fools.
sleep came early tonight. let the bugs bite the fuck out of y'all...

2004-07-04

My funeral will.

Funeral will's later on... hurhurhur... haiz...
Am I losing heart? I don't know.. ah well..
Don't know if I've shared this song with ya.. but I've had it with me for quite a while, kudos to mich that i've got it yah... hahha.. (can see ya smiling there, chelle!)


Chris Rice :: Smile

How far are you, how close am I
I know your words are true and I don't feel them inside
Still I believe you'll never leave
So where are you now ?

you're all I have, you're all I know
your breath is breathing in my soul
Still I am gasping, aching, asking
Where are you now ?

Cause I just wanna be with you
I just want this waiting to be over
I just wanna be with you
And it helps to know the day is getting closer

Every minute takes an hour
Every inch feels like a mile
Till I won't have to imagine
And I finally get to see you smile

My journey's here, but my heart is There
So I dream and wait, and keep the faith, while you prepare
Our destiny, till you come back for me
Oh, please make it soon!

Cause I just wanna be with you
I just want this waiting to be over
I just wanna be with you
And it helps to know the Day is getting closer

Every minute takes an hour
Every inch feels like a mile
Till I won't have to imagine
And I finally get to see you smile

I just wanna be with you
I just want this waiting to be over
I just wanna be with you
And it helps to know the Day is getting closer

I just wanna be with you
I just want this waiting to be over
I just wanna be with you
And it helps to know the Day is getting closer

Every minute takes an hour
Every inch feel like a mile
Til I won't have to imagine
And I finally get to see you

Every minute takes an hour
Every inch feel like a mile
Til I won't have to imagine
And I finally get to see you.. smile..


yeah.. dunno.. ahhaha... really kudos to chelle there for asking me to download that song for her a month ago. heh..

ANYWAY... while I try to dry my keyboard (edwin sprinkled water on to my laptop, that lil' twirp) uuuggghhh.... suuuufffffeeeeerrrrriiiiinnnngggg here.. heh heh heh... stomach upset. it's definitely something I ate yesterday.. what did I eat..... oh right... that hotdog thingy from Orange Julius at Raffles City Mall.. ugggghhh... i'm never going there to eat EVER again!

OOoooohhh!!! hahhaa.. today was "Let's spew our love life's troubles" Day with the girls! we were exchanging stories 'bout each others ex-es and all that.. when it came to my turn.. oh thanks debra.. haha.. for saving my ass like that.. i don't know what I'd do if I had to spew my current problem.. i'd prolly end up being even MORE depressed..
haha.. and that was a really good description of how I was feeling, that you gave! "huilin, don't think this girl here looks so strong man... outside she act like she's so damn cool and nothing can ever get the better of her, but ah, actually ah.. inside, her heart ah.. damn fragile one. worse than glass.. now all shattered into little bits and pieces, she's trying to fix back first. then ah.. after fixing back, she must glue back.. after glue back she must make sure it looks perfect and pretty again, then after that need to polish it, paint it a new coat of paint and then give her 'new' heart a new coat of laquer (extra hard finishing to withstand more heartbreaks) and then ah, she can tell you of her problems.. so now ah.. don't ask her any questions.."


whahaha... bravo man.. never thought you could come up with such a cute description.. oh wait, can't praise you too much, later you go all ego on me again, then i'm gonna get this humungous headache! tsk tsk tsk tsk tsk tsk...

OI! go eat mossy burger again.. (muahahha) never invite me go arh! *makes a face* hmph... haiz.. nvm nvm.... you still owe me how much ah? today $1.50 yah.. yesterday about $10 for your MRT fare, $15 for the shirt (you paid $10 liao)... henna you pay liao.. then bookmarks.. $5 yah... and then what else... rica, you too yah.. you paid for the shirt liao, left with henna --$5 yah, plus that time.. the drinks.. that one i treat you lah, that milkshake at starbucks.. haha.. dunno what else you two owe me siah.. haiz... all of you better save up your money... not good like that wor.... tsk tsk tsk tsk tsk tsk tsk tsk tsk tsk.. hahah... so debra, you owe me a grand total of $21.50.. whahahs.. is that correct? rica.. $5 is all i think.. dunno.. muahah

i've become a loan shark!

Anyways, take your time to pay up... it's alright.. it's not like I'm gonna die tonight or whatever.. (actually, i don't mind that! hahaa) hmm.... let's see... AT MY FUNERAL, you can laugh, but not at me, you can cry, but not for me, you can have fun, but not make fun of me, you can wear cheerful colors too, coz I hate it when it's all black and white. so dull! >__< you MUST play pop music, not funeral songs... you mustn't go "she's dead!" you HAVE to go "OMFG!!!! SHE'S LIVING IN THE DEAD!!!" hahahaha...

okay, i'm insane. hhahahaha...... ;) that's just me. anyway, KEN, you're in-charge of telling them that when I'm eventually dead. (that'll prolly be a few years down the road, who knows i might just drop dead one day?)


alright alright, enough about all this death shit. hahaha... you'll never come across a person who would be so happy about death, mind you. i'm just an exception.. *yawns* i'm tired... sleep time coming soon! yep yep... hahhaa..

Ken, you're a sick horny perverted guy..... and yeah, you're STILL a sick, horny, perverted guy...tsk tsk tsk....

muahahahahah!