2004-08-31

in NUS...

dammit.. if I said NYP's library was frigging huge.. Wait till you guys see NUS's libraries. (note the plural form)

they're FUCKING FUCKING HUGE!!!!! they're like 3 times BIGGER!!!! they're 3 floors more!! my gawds.. the central library is soooooo huge!!!!

I met up with my senior for the zebrafish project, WeiPing at Clementi MRT today. I got to that frigging place (clementi) an hour earlier. (so much for wakin' up at 7am)
she turned up at 9.10am..

Anyway, we took bus 96 into NUS, and she was rather disappointed in PeiSuan, coz PS was the one who initially asked to go to the Temasek Life Sciences Laboratories.. and she didn't turn up in the end. WeiPing was less than pleased about it.

Well, PS, if you happen to read this, please please please... try to put in a little bit more effort for this programme.. weiping told me that as newly made friends, we don't know her well, she could very well just tell the professors who are the trusted and committed ones and who're not.. and who can get involved in other projects in the future.. that kinda thing.. i do hope you really put some more sincerity and commitment to this project.. :( i really don't want to see you cry at the end of it when in the future, the teachers don't send you on good projects or attachments.. so please... i'm begging you, put in abit more effort, k?

i was so worried weiping would kick ps out.. but lucky for all of us, weiping said she'd give lots of chances... i just hope ps uses this as her last chance and puts in more effort.. coz i can see weiping trying very hard not to lose her cool..

Anyway, as I was saying, NUS is SOOOOOO huge!!!! NO ONE walks about the entire campus. They use the shuttle bus, or they drive, cycle, go on their bikes... it's such a clean and wonderful place!!

but the people inside... sheesh.. so stuck up.. okay, not really stuck up.. there was this really cool looking dude who helped me open up the door from the inside coz i didn't know how to open it, and i was stuck outside.. nice fella.. bless him! :)

hmm... well, when we got back to NYP.. i suddenly found the school friggingly small.. hahas.. anyway, I was really displeased with my progress today.. it was pathetic, 20 in an hour!! nevermind, I shall do 30 tomorrow when I get in at 9.30am.. ;)

hmm.. nothing much going on tomorrow.. so bored... every thing's a fixed routine.. perhaps I should start with that assisi hospice thing next week.. hahas.. okays, will go for an interview soon.. ^__^

okay, I think I'll go out with my parents for a while.. then when i get home.. it's studying thru the night...

2004-08-30

day in school....

today, I wasn't supposed to stay in school the entire day, but I ended studying till 5.30 anyway. lol
half the while, I was just playing jawbreaker on my PDA.. :S

I studied with the guys today, (with tim, juncheng and Rayson aka "somebody else")
:D hahas.. it was.. yea.. boring yah.. coz I couldn't study much today.. tim stole my phys. chem notes coz he didn't bring his. I was left to study for my micro A and IMB...
did like 5 chapters of IMB and 3 on micro A.. quite an achievement, but I'm not sure if anything got into that head-aching brain of mine...

hmm.. in the last hour, I gave up studying and started playing jaw breaker. Rayson got interested in it, and we both started competing with each other in it, not 10 minutes later, juncheng got dragged into the game too.. he beat my high scores!!! I had like 696, he beat me to 704, I beat his to 708, he beat me again to 734!!! >__< haha.. but i won't be so haddup as to go beat that stupid score by playing all night long lor.. please lah.. I will just get my older bro to play it till he gets 998 or 1000 lor..

anyway, tim got interested, but we forced him to finish up his physical chem notes.. I shall start typing out my learning notes for all my modules tonight.. shall start with physical chem too.. hahas..

oh yeah, we went down to McD's for lunch at 1pm.. I had McSpicy double EVM-upsized (i was supposed to be on vegetarian for the day, but I forgot till after I sat down at the table with the chicken burger in front of me) well.. I'm still full.. lol..

hmm... we met sicko Lionel and his SJI friend at the library's lift lobby.. hahas..that sicko keeps teasing me whenever he gets the chance to.. bloody kuku lah that fella. Anyway, he was on his way up to the library to study too.. he headed for the 4th floor while the guys and I went back up to the 5th floor's north wing to do more studying..

I swear, my school's library is frigging huge!! I initially thought that it was small, with just the centre wing as the centre portion, the north wing was the small corner, and the south wing the same as the north.
But when I was told by tim to walk up to a shelf, turn 180 degrees around, and DAAAAMN!! I saw this small passage way, opening to this HUGE room filled with SOOOOO many big study tables to fit 6 people each and rows and rows of HUGE bookshelves..

Curious with my new but extremely slow reaction, I took a peek at the south wing's side while going on my toilet break after lunch to find.. another HUGE room filled with the same number of tables and with rows after rows of bookshelves.

Before that, I walked to the 4th floor's south wing, and it was the same size as the upstairs one..
I suppose it's the same for the 4th floor's North wing..

I have thus concluded: NYP is fucking rich (considering the tables are like $400-$500 a piece, the big cushioned chairs $100-$190 each and those HUGE tomes of books that seem to come in 3s and 4s..some in 6s..), and the library is definitely bigger than Ngee Ann Poly's 'Orchard Road' library.. *grins*

Well, after studying and finishing up the last game of jawbreakers, we went down to McD's again.. hehs.. by then I have no idea where ally or PS are.. heard Ally went to band camp, and PS was back home..

Tomorrow, I'll have to be at Clementi MRT at 8 or 9.. gotta ask PS.. hmm.. which means I have to wake up fucking early at 6.30.. ugh.. :(
And then I'll be doing deyolking for a while after we get back from TLL.. and then after deyolking, I gotta meet Ms SiewHiang at the security place at 1.30 for briefing. muahahahs..

I hope to get my 512MB SD card by tomorrow.. hopefully dad's willing to buy it for me.. hahas.. and my foldable keyboard, a screen cover, a casing.. what else.. shit, should have gotten them all at the comex fair lor. stupid gary. he soooo had to insist on getting it at simlim another day. *grumbles* tim told me that he got a 512MB SD for $145 you know.. original pricing was about $140 more than the said offer. :( what a waste.. haiz..

Anyway, PS and I have to go to TLL on wednesday to get the embryos for weiping.. I do hope to get a good job done..one wrong move done, and a mistake made, weiping would blow her top at the both of us.. she's at the verge of breakdown, can see that..

yuck, a flying ant just flew into my face.. In revenge, I fed it to terra.. muahahahaha... the dumb cat actually ate it. I shall try cockroaches next time.. *evil smirk*

Hmm... my new glasses are like twisted.. due to PS's knock into my face the other day lah... :S I'm so screwed up.. haiz.. mom's gonna kill me when she finds out it's distorted.. oh wait.. hahs.. I just fixed it up.. :) i'm saved afterall! let's just hope I don't get those headaches from wearing it..

well, off i go.. watch Gary play more x-box... just got off the phone with mah darlin' lynz.. hahas.. sleep well yeah, girl? :) i'll be here for ya just like how i'm here for the rest of my friends.. ;)

2004-08-29

head hurts. head hurts.

my head has a beat pounding like the conga drums..
and damn, does it hurt... i thought of sleeping at 8.30... nearly got to sleep but lynz called.. we chatted for about 30 minutes I think..

I was like so ...... by then.. seh already..

Watched abit of LoTR: part 2..
then here I am, trying to deal with this stupid headache once again..
everytime, it's at a different part of the head. what's that supposed to mean?

Anyway, think I won't be going for tomorrow's study group.. i dunno.. can't make up my mind about it.. i'll prolly turn up at 11.30 I guess.. i need to catch up on my sleep. i'm looking dead at the moment..

hmm.. oh yeah, lynz didn't buy that pocket pc in the end.. coz she reasoned out that she'd got COUNTLESS palms, COUNTLESS laptops, and yeah.. it's useless having a pocket pc... (now, does that satisfy you, lynz? ;P)

oh man, i can't take this pain anymore.. i gotta go sleep.. byeee...

Thursday Threesomes:

::Cool, blue mornings::

Onesome: Cool-- Well, summer is almost gone (except for those Down Under who are expecting it soon), and the cooler weather is coming. ...and other than those who live in places like Hawai'i, things are about to change. Which do you prefer, the coolness of Winter where you live or the warmth of your Summer?
it's frigging summer forever where i'm at... -__-|||
but i love winters.. they're good. i like it.

Twosome: Blue-- Today's softball: blue or green? Pick one! ...okay, if it's a tie (high or low), what color do you prefer for decorating or accents?
huh? what's this supposed to mean?

Threesome: Mornings-- Mornings, afternoons, evenings, nights... What's your favorite time of day? ...and what makes it so for you?
weekend afternoons. no one disturbs me and i can sleep in peace.. :P


Friday's Feast:

Appetizer
What is a word that your family uses that would not be considered common?
uhm... i dunno.. mom calling us using vulgarities?

Soup
What theme of calendar do you have on your wall this year?
my walls are blank

Salad
Name 3 people you speak with on a daily basis.
amanda, my mom, myself?

Main Course
If you could put a new tattoo on someone you know - who would it be, what would the tattoo be of, and where would you put it on them?
seriously, i have no idea..

Dessert
What is the last beverage you drank out of a glass bottle?
bailey's?

Unconscious mutterings:

GAME BOY :: super mario
Biopsy :: autopsy
Attack :: of the martians
Convention :: comex 2004
Jewels :: bejeweled
Genetics :: i like that. now you're talking..
Impostor :: bloody fuckers
Doug :: doughnuts
Arbitrary :: er....
Oscillate :: clocks


BORED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :S got a frigging headache.. i think i shall go sleep..

boring day...

I spent my whole day customising that PDA of mine...
*yawns* what a boring day.. tomorrow, I shall study my arse off..
haha.. this is actually how I motivate myself to study.. spend one entire day slacking and doing absolutely nothing, and I mean, NOTHING..
then I'd feel really stupid and then I get the urge to study..

Nah, I don't always feel guilty that I didn't study.. too immune to that.. lolz..

hmm.. lynz still at Comex 2004. dammit. she got a foldable keyboard, and a leather casing. fucking hell. i should've waited till today. *sighs* ah.. oh well.. I'll just have to save up for my accessories if this's the case. no big deal.. i'm already saving up. I saved $20 this week.. tomorrow asking mom for some more spending money and I save up some more.. hehs..

well, not sure about tomorrow's study group, but i'll be headed down to Millenia Walk's BK to get some studying done, then making my way down to SimLim to get those accessories, then perhaps I'll meet up with debra and rica for a while before I head on home.. yeah..

Why millenia walk's BK? coz that's where I got most of my chemistry done and over with while jezzie was still back in sg.. haha.. that place is a fun place to study at.. not only are there good looking guys walking in and out of BK, the tables there are huge. and it's freezing cold there. I liiiike.. hahas..

ummm... guess i'll go do some twicking with the blog layouts... yeah...
i'll blog laters, hopefully...

toodles..

oh man.. what a day!

I reached NYP at 9.30am exact... only to realise that they're having GSS this week.. but it's not my duty.. I walked into block Q's lift lobby...
and ewwwwwwwwww......... I saw William Hung lookalike. (I don't like him, he gives me big creeps) He blushes like some beetroot, and he wanted to know me previously. I'm telling you, I'm staying 30-feet away from him. Never even getting an inch from 30-feet closer to him. ick. he's yucky. If there was a celebrity lookalike contest, he'd win the william hung section. trust me when I say that.

Allison, PS, do shut up about teasing me on that annoying idiot (that lookalike) HE IS YUCCCCK!!!!!! *goosebumps pops up*

Anyway, I went up, did my microbio follow-up experiment for Thursday's experiment.. rather fun.. hmm.. went down to speak to Weiping for a moment with PS..

Then PS and I made our way down to the library, where PS left me there and went to the sports complex for band camp.. I had a study session with weisheng.. on physical chem.. thanks dude.. hahs.. finally understood that damn module..

Amanda called a little later, told me about the Comex 2004.. it's a GREAT lobang, thanks lynz! :) I studied a little more after that..
and then, Dad came to pick me up from school.. and we all headed down to suntec city mall..
it was soooooooooo crowded there..!

Well, I managed to buy my pocket pc.. :D it's amazing.. I'll need to add in a few songs, and some other stuff, and i'm done with the pocket pc...
just need to get my casing for it too. They didn't give me any carrying pouch..

Anyway, went back to school after having a little something at Han's..
met kumaran and ian for dinner.. we walked over to the coffeeshop opposite school.. had a quick dinner.. wasn't feeling really great.. :S my head kept spinning 'bout in circles..

hmm... after dinner, we went back to Block A to meet ally and ps.. to get ian's ticket..

The musical was... well.. um... yeah.. it was, ... yeah. well, it was not as good as i expected it to be.. rather much of a disappointment..

well, after the musical ended, the girls went to give roses to the band peeps.. kumaran and ian went home.. I stayed back, waited for dad to get me home..
ps and ally and i were playing in the auditorium.. :P it was fun! ahahaa.. PS knocked my new glasses off my face by slapping my head.. it was pain.. i was soooo disoriented for a while there.. took me about 30 seconds to realise why my vision blurred and my nose hurt a little.. haha.. it's okay PS, i'm totally A-okay now..

Got back home.. and I played with my new pocket pc for like 3 hours, customising it to my liking, putting in some contacts, adding in all the important days and events..
took me like 4 hours to get only half done, i'll continue the rest tomorrow..

hmmm.... had an upsetting chat with tristen. not gonna talk about it.. i'm so fed up right now.. don't think i'll sleep till 2.30 coz i'm still angry at that stupid chat. she just HAD to bring up that topic tonight again. like whatever.

oh, dan tried talking to me this morning.. I didn't try explaining myself. I mean, he doesn't even tell me anything at all. why should I even tell him any of my problems? i don't think that's how friedship goes about. it's useless that I have to do the input of stuff all the time.

Anyway.. gotta go...
toodles..

2004-08-27

reminising the past...pondering about now...

I was just reading through my older blogger entries at this blog.. (I've got like a xanga, a blog with rica and debra, another blogger, this blog, and 2 ujournals. makes it 6 blogs.)

And I really really miss those limited happy days.. it really is very short-lived..
Gone were the days when I could be happy, smile all day, worry about the little things..

It's true when they say that kids have the most care-free of lives..

I miss him more and more each day, but there's nothing much I can do about it. He wants to be such a jerk, I can't change him, but neither can he.. to want him to know that I still like him and love him, it's impossible now. I just miss those days, I miss him. These words are an understatement to what I really feel.


Many people tell me jokingly, that I'm such a bad influence to them.. am I really?
I don't really seem to think so.. I do drink.. but it's seldom. I pierced my ears, but didn't get my skin tattooed. I don't know.. that's all I went. I didn't even do drugs. I don't drink and drive. hell, I don't even club. sheesh.

anyway, I'm thinking way too much for my own good...

The whole of next week is for revisions.. there's no school... mugging's all i'm gonna do.. dunno if got the mood to go out with the rest.. gotta see how.. haiz..

Life's being such a fucking bore to me now.. I mean, school's fun, no doubt. but like I told michelle earlier on.. now "we can both shake hands and go dotting all the way..." i'm really just so.. .... ..... ...... yeah. just like .... that. :S

So much has happened in the course of 4 months. What was 4 months ago, is certainly not how it's like to be now.. it's two different worlds, with the same person. It's rather disturbing. watching me change from a totally clueless person, to a still clueless but very much busy and depressed soul.

School's getting really busy now.. That zebrafish project.. the hospice.. that one I have to ask Ms Geraldine on how they go about it.. school work's getting tougher.. I've said that yesterday. Now I have doubts as to whether I can cope or not. I know in the end I will cope with it.. I just gotta find my anchor, and then I'll be off from there again..

Hmmm.... well, I have to go sleep now..
having class at 9.30am tomorrow. It's a follow-up microbiology lab practical..

Terra's getting heavier. She still loves abusing dad and i.. damnations..
her fur feels like extra soft thick velvet to my skin. i love cuddling up with her..

There are so many things to say right now, but i can't, so i won't.... it's hard living in my situation. it sucks to be me.. :( ah well...

i'm off to bed.. bonne nuit.

maybe I should take up immunology with heamatology...
ughs... (it's meant for me to know, for you to find out..or maybe never find out.)


I'm so tired today... only coz, yeah, i'm exhausted. it's the end of the week.
But I still have school tomorrow... *yawns*
I should have taken Law School instead. It'd have been so much easier than MB.. coz language and reading and solving problems are my daily life.. but nevermind, I shall perservere in my field, and try my best in it..

Drinking DOM tonic as I'm having my dinner.. muahahas.. what a combination.. it's mee goreng and chicken nuggets tonight.. :)

Oh, can't wait for next tuesday, I'll be going to NTU with Weiping.. nicee... go see how a bunch of horny zebrafish mate.. lol

Lynz, i'm worried about you.. we'll have to confirm those results on monday yah.. when you know the results, do tell me..

Today was a drag.. but I forgot all my problems in French class.. Mr Mallard has been nice.. he likes CLEMENT and TIMOTHY!!! muahahaha.. makes ally and I wonder if he's actually a bi-sexual guy.. hmmmmmm..... lol
anyway, French was fun today, ally and I were hauled out to do role play.. it was.. well.. kinda interesting.. Mr Mallard make LOTS of mistakes in our 'lunch' order. Ally ordered SIX escargots, but he gave TWELVE. I ordered café crémme, he gave me thé.. Ally wanted limonade, he gave her biéré... -___-||
We paid 18.50 euros in the end.. rather cheap for a lunch for two.. :)

After French, ally followed me to Kovan to get my new tinted glasses.. she was soooooo envious of my new specs.. okay, not quite, but still she was rather envious that it's a cross between Eric's and Ian's.. lol.. and it's got my own touch to it too, so my glasses are fuck-unique.. okay, it's simple and ordinary as ever though.. *grumbles*

Shown mom my glasses before she rushed out the front doors to a teacher's day dinner.. she was pleased with them.. ^__^

I wanna eat instant noodles instead of this huge plate of home-made mee goreng.. not that it's not nice.. it's just not hot... and there's no soup.. :(
ahh well.. maybe laters..

hmmm...I haven't told majin about the zebrafish thing.. wait till I tell him.. he'll call me sick. :P but then, he's a annoying gross one, fancy him calling me a murderer.. that'll be new..

hold on, time for me to down the rest of my alcoholic tonic.. yummy stuff... see char, i'm taking my supplements.. forced to take it some more... :S it's so hot and fiery.. yuck.. okay, i like the warmth of it.. but it's burning.. :(

brb.. will post later..
casper's on TV.. :)

2004-08-26

Desktop Confessional...

You get Dashboard Confessionals, here I am, a deskstop confessional...
I confess to this desktop of mine when I view the need to be...

I am OVERLOADED with work for once..

Yes, I have finally reached my maximum limit.. whahas... okay, maybe not maximum..
but anyway, let me just briefly list out the numerous things I have to do. (it may not seem alot to many, but it's like 70% filled in my jobs' list capacity..):

- Studying. (for the common tests in 10 days time.) shit, i'm dead meat.
- Zebrafish programme. (twice a week, an hour or more per session)
- NYP Pals (nothing much atm, but when there's stuff, it's hectic)
- Assisi's Children's Hospice (i have to call Geraldine Tan up soon)
- OBS Sabah (training is needed for this) -->provided i get chosen
- SCL Club (only TENTATIVE. heaven knows if lionel put me in for it)
- Taking care of Gary
- NYAA (assisi, obs and scl club comes under this)
- HOMEWORK!!! (3 reports/week, 5 tutorials/week too)
- gene mutation report.
- being a good friend (by not being a whinner/complainer too much, being there for others)


heh.. so much to do.. so little time given..
i'm so tired.. haiz.. i'm going to sleep now...
oh wait.. got french ta do... ughs... byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees...

heh....

for 5 minutes when I first started today's session of de-yolking...

I found it absolutely gross, utterly fascinating, yet grostequely... inhumane.

Yes, yes, inhumane is the right word..
I had to kill a living thing.. no, not one, but I killed at least...... 20 living things today? :( Not good, but I had to do it in a professional deposition so that I didn't feel too sadden or guilty for killing those growing zebrafish..

Well, of which at least 50% were mutated, so it was alright..
Weiping said I'm really good at this.. I could even deyolk faster than her..

I guess you tend to do more when you're alone in a freezing room full of air and zebrafish and there's no one else to talk to you..
I did like an average of 20 fishes in 30 minutes.. I should be able to do 40 in an hour.. that's as fast as weiping herself.. and I deyolked those eggs perfectly too! :) the art of perfection is on its way.. ;)

Hmm.. today.. oh yeah.. my laptop's down with that stupid Trojan virus. So please, don't ask me to send any thing via online, and vice versa..

I'm sleepy.. I think I shall go take my shower and go sleep later... This happened last thursday.. lol..what a routine..
let's see...

okay! to keep me awake.. (I have to do research later, I just remembered)
I shall describe, in DETAILS, how I de-yolked those poor little zebra fishies.. and well, if you were disgusted by it, I'm really sorry.. some people like reading the details, so I shall describe. (I know most don't.. but :P i love my minority in this case)

Anyway, here goes:
While seated at that HUGE microscope, I took out those cute little eggs, and dropped them into the ringer solution.. I prepared the magnifications and all that, took out the syringes, and look into the oculars... (the eye piece)

I thought those little things wouldn't move you know, since I couldn't even make out their little miniscule hearts, but to my fascination, they DID!! they had this jerky wriggly movement.. like how those hairy worms you feed to big fishes would move about..

When I was about to pierce the chorion (cell membrane for the egg), the little growing fish seemed to know, it started squirming away.. it was wrong.. I knew it was wrong, but I had to do it.. So, I pierced the chorion.. the fish feteus broke free from the chorion, and it wriggled free and then I had to pierce into the feteus's yolk, scrap all the sticky yolk out..

and then the fish just stops moving...


it's yucky...

but when the fish is dead.. I get to heave a sigh of relief..
not only can I now scrap out the yolk in a more precise and accurate way, the fish no longer has to suffer anymore pain..

Why do I still de-yolk when I can't bear to watch them suffer and struggle for their lives? it's only coz whenever I break a chorion, it's a must to kill the fish already, as the ringer solution would kill them even more slowly later..

hmm.. talking to Jezzie kor kor now.. whahahs.. i miss him so much.. haha.. :P

we're talking about those fuck-annoying AJC students.. NEVER ever go there, if you so much get registered there and you walk over to nyp for a meal, that's it, you're on my hate-list.

I HATE CURRENT ANDERSON JC STUDENTS!!!

sorry Jezz.. had to say that.. I don't hate you, coz you're a former student.. hahs..

anyway... i'm sooo tired... Weiping made me wash the fish tanks today... fun, but disgusting... so much dirt... eww... :S

well, i'll be off then... :)
toodles for now..

2004-08-25

lalalalalala....

Today, I talked to lots and lots of people... :)

okay, not that much, but it was all good talk.. informative, and some... eh.. not quite so..

Hahas.. well, Physical Chem lab session today was such a bore.. it was TITRATIONS again today!! can sleeeeeep at those you know... I'll be sooooo glad when this semester is done.. ughs...

IMB lecture was super fun! :) we read about the Viagra Story.. hahahaa.... :D Ms Yap is such a goooood story teller! :) i love her lectures!!! *grins some more*

hmm.. then I saw WeiPing.. she had to cut off 4 people from our Zebrafish project.. :S i hope the rest don't feel so bad about it.. hopefully we can call back Clement and one other person.. I know how much clement wanted to be in this programme too... :S maybe PS and I should talk to WeiPing about it.. convince her to take clement back yeah? hmm.. tomorrow's break session will be for me and PS to go de-yolking again...

I'll tell about more about the de-yolking! :D it's sooo fun!
okay, well, we had Comm. skills.. I'm nearly done with that module.. I can pass it with ease, it's just a matter of getting my distinction.. I shall work hard on getting all 70%...

Hmm.. before Comm skills.. Mrs Lau, the comm skills teacher wanted to have a moment with me.. I thought it had something to do with the module stuff.. but she started talking about the Assisi hospice thing.. phew! thought what..
hmm.. well, she told me that we now had to go through an interview first, and she has no doubt that I could get through the interview coz I reassured her that it was a long term thing that I was doing.. I mean, it's definitely over a year that I'll be doing this.. with or without NYAA too.. she was pleased with my eagerness to participate in this volunteering job, but she warned that it would be rather depressing. Well, so long as it's not as depressing as those elderly people in the old folks' home, then I'm perfectly fine. I just pray that I don't stare too much at those kids.. it's rude to stare..

After comm skills, PS and I went to the zebrafish project room to have our first session with weiping.. :) it was fun, to say in the least. No wait, fun is a HUGE under-statement!

It was a dream come true!!! :D hahaha.. it's what I've always dreamt of doing.. sitting in front of the HUGE expensive microscope, and fine-tuning the microscope, finding cells and viewing cells at such HUGE magnifications.. WOW!!! hahaha.. i was just simply so marvelled and fascinated by that one zebrafish embryo.. it was really very interesting...

I have to use two needled syringes.. and then hold the egg inbetween them, pierce the tip of one syringe into the chorion, then with the other syringe, destroy the chorion by tearing it off like you're tearing off your present wrappers in a hurry.. :P hehe..
then, after that, the yolk and fish cells would pop out, it's still fused together, so I'll have to de-yolk it.. now, here's the hard part, for i have to de-yolk that fused part without destroying too many fish cells...

This is where my art of perfection shall be empowered on ('empowered'.. just learnt in comm. skills class this afternoon!) and well, i'm nearly close to perfection... :) wei ping said many find it rather difficult to do.. but I found it such a breeze, like I was made to do stuff like this! :) I know I sound really cocky and over-confident.. but I really found it so simple and easy to do all this de-yolking..

Hmmm...
well, I rushed out at 3.25pm for my SCL Club interview..
Initially, I thought and felt that the current SCL Club president, Lionel was rather fierce and damn stuck-up.. Turns out, he's from St. Pat's.. bloody bugger... the moment he closed the door, he asked "you from IJ school one right?" with this know-it-all grin on his face.. the moment I gave that one lifted eyebrow and this "so what?" look, he went "ahhh... another typical IJ trait.. definitely IJ" I was like "yeah... so..? got a problem with me being IJ?" don't mind me, but I do have a prideful IJ spirit instilled in me.. hahas.. and I told him I used to go to St. Joseph's Convent. He went "Ahhhhh...." hahah.. stupid sicko..

I told him he looked like some fierce whacko guy.. he started laughing like some maniac... hahahah.. was what I said THAT funny? :P nevermind, in any case, it gave me a upperhand at that interview coz he relaxed so much more immediately after that "you.. look... sooooo fierce..." Oi, took guts to say that in his face you know.. he's got the power to out me in that interview..

Anyway, I told him I sucked at pep rallies.. I never talk much during those kinda events. I think actions DO speak much louder than words, but often times, black and white still over rules those actions. didn't tell him that though..

Well, through out the interview, we crapped more than we were supposed to, did less interviewing than we were meant to do, he was pleased at my personality.. which gives me a upper hand.. :) haha.. damn that eric, told me he'd go today.. he didn't turn up in the end... :( PS wanted soooo badly to join SCL Club too...
hopefully I'm in with the committee... hahaha.. it'll be fun.. everyone in SCL must vote for me!!!! Because... hmmm... well, can't think of a good reason.. hahaah... nvm.. just vote for me anyway.. hahaha.... :)

Hmm... well, let's see...
Oh yes, mah dearest ALLISON!!!! where are yoooou? hahha.. today didn't get to talk much to you ah.. :( haiz.. sad sad.. nvm, we shall talk more tomorrow!! haha.. then we can start on our crapping exercise once more yeah? :)

My two dearest best friends.. you haven't BLOGGED in our blog for AGES!!! >__< rica, where has your exsistance gone to? you're hardly online anymore leh..

Oh yeah, heard that MSN's gonna charge for peeps using Messenger.. ughs.. hope that doesn't even happen man.. :S I love MSN.. it's so frigging unfair if I have to pay...

Anyway..
yeah.. hehs... time to get some revisions done!!! :) see y'all tomorrows!!!
Love y'all...remember to vote for meeeee!! ^__^

Toodles! :D

2004-08-24

i shall perfect the art of de-yolking....

de-yolking those embryos... muahahahs...
I'm feeling evil again... this is my time to live, breathe, and be free...

I shan't let annoying anonymous people's words get to me.. such people, I can't waste my precious time on. If he wants to be such a piss off in his pants, he can go be one..

Anyway, tomorrow is de-yolking-embryo-training day!! hahahs... I can't wait to kill some zebrafish.. it'll be so fun..

I shall perfect the art of de-yolking those embryos...
And I shall do that for the next 3 years till I'm sooooo sick and tired of it..

Haha.. Clement will be my partner-in-crime..
We shall have our session with weiping tomorrow.. I guess it's stuff like these that perks up our dull course.

Most people think that we're all about looking down microscopes (they're frigging expensive, mind you.. $50,000 a piece kinda thing) all day and just looking at non-motile living micro-organisms and doing lab reports. (which is what we do in year one)

But it's the research stuff that we do that perks things up..
Do you know how interesting it is to see a mutated life form that's like 5 times smaller than an ant under that microscope?

It's dead interesting.

:) I can't wait for that session tomorrow..

hmm... well.. SCL club interview tomorrow!! whahahs... and I thought my position was GONE... thank goodness... :P
I've got luck in NYP... Love decided to take away my current love.. blah.. no problem with me.. I can cope with that.. hahs...
At least I don't try to cry at night now..

Linkin' Park ~*~ Nobody's Listening

Yo, peep the style and the kids checking for it
The number one question is "how could you ignore it?"
And drop right back in the cut
Over basement tracks and rap stack got you backing us up
Like rewind that!
We're just rollin' with the rhythm,
Rise from the ashes of stylist division
With these non-stop lyrics are life living,
Not to be forgotten, but still unforgiven
But in the meantime, there are those
Who wanna talk this and that, so I suppose
That it gets to a point where feelings got to get hurt,
And get dirty with the people spreading the dirt
It goes...

Tried to give you warning, but everyone ignores me
Told you everything loud and clear
But nobody's listening
Called to you so clearly, but you don't want to hear me
Told you everything loud and clear
But nobody's listening

I got a heart full of pain, head full of stress
Hand full of anger, held in my chest
And everything left's a waste of time,
I hate my rhymes, but hate everyone else's more
I'm riding on the back of this pressure,
Guessing that it's better, I can't keep myself together
Because all of this stress gave me something to write on,
But pain gave me something I could set my sights on
Never forget the blood, sweat and tears,
The uphill struggle over years, the fear and
Trash talking and the people it was to,
And the people that started it, just like you

Tried to give you warning, but everyone ignores me
Told you everything loud and clear
But nobody's listening
Called to you so clearly, but you don't want to hear me
Told you everything loud and clear
But nobody's listening

I got a heart full of pain, head full of stress
Hand full of anger, held in my chest
Uphill struggle, blood, sweat and tears
Nothing to gain, everything to fear
Heart full of pain, head full of stress
Hand full of anger, held in my chest
Uphill struggle, blood, sweat and tears
Nothing to gain, everything to fear
Heart full of pain
Heart full of pain
Heart full of pain...

Tried to give you warning, but everyone ignores me
Told you everything loud and clear
But nobody's listening
Called to you so clearly, but you don't want to hear me
Told you everything loud and clear
But nobody's listening

I got a heart full of pain, head full of stress
Nobody's listening
Hand full of anger, held in my chest
Nobody's listening
Uphill struggle, blood, sweat and tears
Nobody's listening
Nothing to gain, everything to fear
Nobody's listening


hmmm... school rocks.. love it.. at least I don't have to rot and think too much..
okay, I've spent the entire night doing NOTHING except chatting with the peeps... haha.. i've made sooo many new friends in school already..

Oh, you know what.. i just remembered.. Ying Shya called out to me in school today! We (sinister trio) were at the Prisons, Civil Defence, Police Force career exhibition after school.. we bumped into Zhong Xi (I swear those two -allison and zhong xi- are sooo compatible!!! they both wore white tops and blue jeans today!) there and then ying shya too!!! hahaa.. ying shya was like "ANGELINE!!" hahaha... :P
Maybe she doesn't hate me afterall!! *big grin*

Guess things aren't THAT bad afterall..

Moral out of all this mess: Always look on the bright side of life, and never let matters get to your skin.
(sorry PS, that i'm stealing your trademark, just this once)

it really really works when you look on the brighter side of life..

well, time for me to get some shut eye...
toodles for the night....

Siglap Killiney Kopitiam

that place is worth going..
In case you can't see the title, I actually put in this coffee shop dad brought me to after school today.. :)

Killiney Kopitiam in Siglap..

it's this nice cozy little.. coffee shop..
nice place.. the toasted bread and kaya with butter is goooooood... yummy shit... :)
the coffee there could rival mom's side granny's... it's solid, good.. but not hot.. yucky... shouldn't have let it cooled..

The only reason why I'd go over to granny's now is for coffee..
her brew is gooooood.. and solid.. i liiiike... hahaha..

I'm a girl blessed with good, yummy, quality, everyday, singaporean-flavoured delicacies.. :) *nods*


Anyway, school today was FUN, FUN, FUN!!!
Hahahs.. let me bring you through my day in school with you... :P

I woke up at 9.20am this morning, with only like 40 minutes till French started.. I was sure Christophe Mallard would be teaching us today, but then again, last friday's lesson was still with Mr Tse... Tse was good.. well, we THOUGHT he was good..

but Christophe Mallard is better.. cute fella that teacher.. haha.. he cracks all sorts of jokes in class! albeit sacarstic, but he's good.. sorry ah gimmy, gotta disagree with yah on mr mallard.. haha.. :P

Inorg Chem lab session today was fun, to say the least..
was dealing with some corrosive acids.. hahs.. well, not really corrosive, but anyways.. yeah... had lots of fun doing the filtering! :D

hmm... was supposed to go for the zebrafish-project training today.. but they scheduled it for tomorrow.. hopefully the comm. skills teacher allows us to skip class.

Oh some anonymous person just tagged again..
such a rude fella.
Let me tell you 'anonymous', if you're supposedly haydern this time.
Whether or not I care about you is also none of your business if this is the case.
Bear in mind, I have a full mind on making sure I'll make you suffer too should I happen to be in Sydney.

You seriously make me digusted with your attitude.
someone, hack into this IP address and track this location down for me...
166.121.37
it's the same IP address as that supposed nyp person. I highly doubt this person is from nyp anyway..
where's majin when I need him to do the tracking for me.. hmm.... will ask him tonight when he's online.

So much for having a nice day. Some bloody ass just has to ruin my mood. :( ugh... nevermind, I shall keep that in mind and bear with it.

anyway, I'm outta here.. there's nothing much to blog about now..
I'm just refraining from screaming out any swear words.

two-seventy-one..

two-seventy-one... thirty more and I'll hit the big three-double-O.

I had lots to say tonight, but I just don't feel like talking much anymore.
Maybe it's the fact that I am, too.. getting depressed... :( it's a bad case..
I'm not into my own world.. but I just feel depressed is all. PMS, most may call it..
I don't think it is. It's more like "I really just feel depressed"

it's hard to describe it. I feel sad for some reasons that I just don't feel like talking about it..
Maybe I will talk about it, but not right this second.

Anyway, I still find Haydern's case very puzzling. Makes me just frown soooo much, just soo much.. I'm worried for him now..(I'm slow sometimes, you really can't blame me) haiz... I just don't get it.. Jezz, question to ask.. Is there such a thing as a rare condition in b-Thal Major? that it shows at a later age? it's impossible, isn't it not? it's either you have b-Thal Major or you don't. if you DO have it, you die at 10.. not 26... or 32.. or 45...
that's not how b-Thal Major works.. i'm just soooo confused and puzzled now.

Nevermind, that aside..
I'm most prolly in for OBS Sabah.. people at the Student Affairs Office(SAO) ask weird questions.. I do hope melvin doesn't get into OBS Sabah... i'm telling you, my life will be a living hell if he DOES get into it.. :S

I'm also in for a rough ride with the people at SAO..seriously, what do they think of us SCL students?!?! piling me up for event after event, commitment after commitment. They're a bunch of crazy lunatics, those at the SAO...

I'm also in with the Zebrafish project. That one, I will FORCE myself to sit through it for the next three years. It will be worth it. I will have something of prestige to my name for once. And it's something to do with studies, not the non-curricular section.. And I get to kill zebrafish...



I'm heading down this bottomless pit of darkness.. who's here to save me?
I'm so loaded with everyone's problems.. maybe I seem the type who can give a listening ear, that's why many have been coming to me and pouring and venting all their anger and woes onto me.. It's not everyone's that doing that, but then again, it's not that no one's not doing it either, if you get what I mean..

haha.. I don't know, blogging is my way of venting.. When I find that I've complained too much to others, I just vent it out here.. it helps most of the time, but other times, I just keep complaining till my friends tell me to shut up..

haiz.. dunno lah..

Normal days, I'd be jumping about in joy with having a chance to go OBS Sabah, being one of the 16 out of 70 applicants chosen to be part of the zebrafish project.. being viewed as a super student who is all-rounded in everything.. it's nice to know that TECHNICALLY, everything is flowing smoothly. Like what I've told myself time and over again, "Can I cope with this, eventually?"

I really hope that all will be fine for me.. This is my time of my life.. I can't let everything get in my way, screw me out fuck-senseless, just to leave me in shambles and a wreck after this course.

I hope my sense of direction and my judgement will be good. I just really do hope and pray that Haydern will find himself a suitable donar soon. :( I find his case a really really heart-breaking one, whether I know him personally or not..



ALLLLL THIS SHIT ASIDE...
ugh.. so much sadness.. i'm soooo frustrated by it all now..
anyway...
I've been having a headache that's been going on for like 5 days already..
Granted, I haven't had my supplements in like a month or so.. I HATE DOM.. as in that tonic liquor.. it's horrid stuff...
But anyway.. I slept for 12 hours the other day.. well, I think i shall go sleep now too.. i feel tired. and my head hurts loads.. haiz....


well, good night..
toodles..

2004-08-23

Guys and their prides...

This is a record breaking entry.. I took.. 10 hours typing this out... will explain later. first, read this:


QUESTION!!!!


What's up with guys and their never-ending PRIDE?


I just realised haydern's got lots of it.. he tried being noble, now he's playing the mean one in last attempt to get me away. Successfully too, I might add.. Still, I really hate watching him rot away like this..

You may not love me anymore, fabio.. and although I may say so many times that I hate you so much for what you've done to me.. I still bring myself to forgive you.. You're the only guy, only PERSON in fact whom I've forgiven for too many times.. (remember the Sharon incident? compare her's to yours..) haiz.. the things we do for the ones we care are simply overwhelming sometimes. haydern's lucky he's not female.. (thank gods for that!) i'm no lesbian, so I tend to be harsher towards the girls sometimes.. especially those who think they can over rule me.. like that sharon.. okay, straying off topic now.. anyway..

My point is.. I don't know if what you said is for real or not.. coz with everything that's happened and been happening.. I don't know who to trust now.. I'm equally as lost on this rocky path of mine as you are on yours.. it's both equally rocky if you want to compare our lives now..

I know it'll come to the day when he steps off that road with a final good bye and bows off the stage the way he always does.. The day when I said I wouldn't cry but deep down I know I would.. Hopefully that day doesn't arrive too soon.. I don't know if I'm well prepared for it or not.. maybe i'll be too numbed by then, who knows?

Char's right this time, yes, I still do care for him.. painful, harsh reality of it yeah?

hmmm... i won't say much of it, just that I still pray for him everyday that he gets better as the days goes by and he'll get a donar soon...

Oh man, speaking of donating blood.. Can't donate blood no more!!! :( There's GSS on 5th Sept too... ughs.. sorz WeiSheng, can't go liao..

And speaking of WeiSheng.. he's one great person. haha.. no doubt way older than me.. that makes him more mature.. he gives great advice too you know? hahaha.. gives out wake up calls to me.. thought-provoking things to think about... thanks yah..

I know I type out alot the past few weeks, do bear with me.. :) poor jezz.. if you need a summary of what's happening, just ask me.. kk? I can't wait for jezzie to come back in december!! :D my movie kaki's coming home soon.. muahaha... then he can teach me more stuff that he's learnt in school too.. oh man, this will be so cool.. but hopefully jezzie doesn't go back to Adelaide too soon.. I miss you leh, jezzie kor.. no one to whine to... :(

well... Oh yea.. I'm being short-listed to join the zebrafish project in school.. :)
but I wasn't told to go for an interview for SCL School Club.. :( OI!!! This sucks okay.. how come Nad gets to join school club with out even being picked in the first place? :S no fair.. but I guess it's only for the better...
:D who knows, I get to be OGL.. awright.. that'll rawk my world man.. get to sabotage nad like that.. muahahah...

Besides, it's true that I'm not in my right frame of mind to joing SCL School Club.. too many commitments in school is a bad thing..

shit talking about school.. i have that stupid report STILL incomplete!! *groans* this is becoming a chore..

MOM.. DAD.. I NEED A PDA, okay? :) please please please buy me a PDA... a good one with colour.. hahah.. and it can plan and store all the shit that I have and need to complete with looooooots of memory space.. and it's got a nice big calender system... okie? :D oh and god, if you're listening, please please please convince my mom and dad to get that PDA for me.. muahaha..

okay, fat hope, in my dreams that god ever reads anything off the net.. hahahahahaha.. it's like talking to a blank wall with so much hopes filled in me..

Amanda said she'd spare me a PDA if I wanted it.. but I don't want to seem like i'm greedy, so i'm not taking it, k Amanda? haha.. I just hate taking people's things just coz i think i need one and there's one available for me... maybe if i don't get a PDA by end of september, you can give that unused one to me for my birthday.. saves you so much money.. and i'll buy you that hot pink pig for your 18th birthday.. hahaha.. actually I was thinking of buying it for ya anyway.. :P that's if it's still on sale, yah?

hmmm since we're on the topic of gifts.... *sly grin* I might as well type out my wish list...

you'll find a replica on the side bar yeah? :D

- webcam
- digicam (i'm saving up on this one)
- that PDA
- gummy bears (gimmy.. you know what to do)
- money (heh.. donations, anyone?)
- CD player (j/k)
- soft toys!!! (IT'S A MUST!)
- BAGS (that's to my best friends rica n debra)
- a new up-to-date handphone j/k)
- CDs (that's to gary)
- companions to the blood centre! (let's go donate blood!!)
- a dinner treat
- a biiiiiiig cake!! :D (i get a small one every year)
- or maybe 3 small cakes with 3 celebrations?
- more soft toys!!

Speaking of soft toys.. i shall steal debra's cam for a night one of these days and show you how my toy monkey looks like.. i call him 'dumbass' only coz he's gary's b-day present.. as in his friends gave it to him for his b-day 2 years ago.. so yea.. ahah.. dumbass is a very good monkey.. he takes my awful dreams away and comforts me all the time.. :) i love my 'dumbass'..

hmmm.... so, you all... should know what to get for me ah.. ;)

99% of the time, I know I won't get them gifts, but no harm telling you what I want right? ;)

BUT!!!!!
Junie, you owe me my presents from last year till now... i want that Clay Aiken CD.. and then the soft toy.. and then.. hmm.. buy me an extra soft toy for this year's b-day? :) hehe.. thank yoooou!!!


Anyway, it's like 11.45pm now.. I was trying to get my reports done.. i'm only half done with them...
none the less.. something WeiSheng just passed to me.. hah.. hmm.. it's supposedly a chain letter, I've sent to over DOZENS of people.. but i think this is worth reading.. maybe not, but it's rather interesting anway...

Here are 25 reasons why guys like girls:

1.
They will always smell good even if its just shampoo.

2.
The way their heads always find the right spot on our shoulder.

3.
How cute they look when they sleep.

4.
The ease in which they fit into our arms.

5.
The way they kiss you and all of a sudden everything is right in the world.

6.
How cute they are when they eat.

7.
The way they take hours to get dressed but in the end it makes it all worth while.

8.
Because they are always warm even when its minus 30 outside.

9.
The way they look good no matter what they wear.

10.
The way they fish for compliments even though you both know that you think she's the most beautiful thing on this earth.

11.
How cute they are when they argue.

12.
The way her hand always finds yours.

13.
The way they smile.

14.
The way you feel when you see their name on the call ID after you just had a big fight..

15.
The way she says "lets not fight anymore" even though you know that an hour later....

16.
The way they kiss when you do something nice for them.

17.
The way they kiss you when you say "I love you"...

18.
Actually ...
just the way they kiss you...

19.
The way they fall into your arms when they cry..

20.
Then the way they apologize for crying over something that silly.

21.
The way they hit you and expect it to hurt..

22.
Then the way they apologize when it does hurt.
(even though we don't admit it)!

23.
The way they say "I miss you"..

24.
The way you miss them.

25.
The way their tears make you want to change the world so that it doesn't hurt her anymore.....

Yet regardless if you love them, hate them, wish they would die or know that you would die without them ... it matters not.
Because once in your life, whatever they were to the world.. they become everything to you.
When you look them in the eyes, traveling to the depths of their souls and you say a million things without trace of a sound..
you know that your own life is inevitable consumed within the rhythmic beatings of her very heart.

We love them for a million reasons, No paper would do it justice.
It is a thing not of the mind but of the heart.
A feeling.
Only felt.


hmm.. yeah, guess that's true...
ahhh yes... we were talking about my dear dear jonathon!! ^__^ he's online now! :D how blessed I am.. I miss that guy soooo much.. ahhaha.. I can't wait to get to sydney to see him when I grad out of NYP.. hee...

hmmm i just realised.. haydern's name on my wrist is fading away! Yes!! hahaha.. i agree with mom, the whole thing looks hideous... hmm..

well, I gotta get going.. need to complete that e-prac for the bench by tomorrow.. i mean in a few minutes.. hahs...
byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...
toodles! :) [it's like 0045hrs now.. so yeah..]

2004-08-22

how... how... ughs..

How do I tell my parents?
How do I tell my mom... that i'm no longer with him? hmmm... that's a hurdle to jump...

I shall tell it to her on tuesday, maybe...

How do I tell my mom... that I'm not feeling well?
it's so hard to describe to her the pain that's going on in my head..
I'm not even sure if it's caused by that ulcer in my gum...
All I know that it hurts and hurts and hurts, I can cry my heart out on it like someone close just died, but I can't coz if I did cry, it'll hurt even more up in my head..

I can only point out to her that my head fucking hurts like hell.. but I can't describe it to her... it's neither piercing or what.. it's like overwhelming..

Everyone's starting their revisions, but with this pain, I can't even do anything except lie in bed and rot rot and rot some more...

Mom knows there's more to it than just me being in pain with that head of mine... hmmm... well, it's time to get over him.. and although he still has a place in my heart, I guess I have to start building up that wall that I did a year ago.. guys really suck.. especially those who love stalking me for no reason.. *shudders*

I had such a scare this morning.. for no rhyme or reason, this old penpal of mine sms-ed me. Gins told me earlier on last year that this same fella called me a weirdo. Of obvious reasons that I was a full nerd and I loved to annoy people back then. I was pissed, so I deleted him off. It's only natural to do that. I think I shall do the same this time round. He freaks me out.

Mom just commented that I looked really pale.. should I even begin to worry?
I don't know, like I told Jezz.. maybe I just don't care.. tell me the worst things a person can ever have, and I'd still smile my day away, that's if I have the correct dosage of crazy people around me to cheer me up..

Either way, feeling really yucky now.. feel like puking due to the panadol mom just gave me about close to an hour ago.. I have yet to finish my homework.. now, this is worrying..

I can't wait to get my glasses this coming saturday.. :)
blah, sorz mich, I can't stop all this vulgarity thing.. hah.. trying hard, hopefully my hard work pays off.. mild ones like "shit" still turn up in my speech, but I'm sure that can be forgiven. 'shit' isn't an offensive word in singapore anyway. it's just an exclaimatory term.

I want my PDA and a couple of CDs.. the Maroon 5 CD.. that Avril Lavigne one.. yep yep.. I still don't like the chinese ones.. I just don't understand the language.. (I don't understand french either, but i'm getting there)

This week's Unconscious Mutterings:

Olympics :: Chariots of Fire
Wicked :: thoughts
Intoxicating :: smile
Radical :: surf dudes
Misinformed :: judgement
Triplets :: tom, dick and harry
Coronation :: huh?
Asimov :: what the hell is that?
Contemporary :: dance
1 :: the champion of champions!

i'm logging out for a while.. work awaits!!

2004-08-21

to the optician i went.. from there, I got home...

just got home from the optician's... hah...
my degree got LOWER!!!!!

hahhaha...
the lady serving me said my degree was at 125degrees..
but it went back up to about 150!! but still, it's lower than my usual 175degrees!!! muahahah...
i have successfully lowered that myopic vision of mine...
sucks having to wear glasses.. mom bought me a box of soft lenses though.. ^__^

i'm a happy girl tonight! :)

hmm... in other cases...
I don't think I would be getting my PDA that soon then...
but I will save up for it...
Dad doesn't really approve of my getting a PDA, but I think it would prove useful.. I'm running out of space to jot down notes in my handphone and i'm too lazy to get out my paper and pen..

hmmm..
in this week's Thursday Threesomes:

::Desperate times lead to disparate measures::

Onesome:Desperate times-- Hmmm... The ever present time crunch. Do you have a story of a time when you needed to be somewhere and it just didn't look like it was going to work out? Did you make it? No??? What happened?

oh man... i can't begin my story.. hahas.. i'm usually late when i can't wake up...
so yeah... once or twice I don't make it in time... i just get all the attention to myself is all... the stares and such..

Twosome: lead to-- What leads you to write at your place? What strikes your fancy and leads you to your keyboard to share it with the blogosphere?

what leads me to type at this blog? for the fact that I can't find my paper diary, this comes in super handy.. I can blog while in school, and everyone would know what I'm talking about most of the time when I mention up something on my mind that i've blogged out before.. it's to my own convenience really..

Threesome: disparate measures-- Hey, what is it you do that's really different from your friends or family or acquaintances that drives them to distraction? Is it something as simple as the way you put the toilet paper roll on? ...or maybe your habit of eating all your vegetables first? Come on, you know there's a little something it's safe to share with the gang!

Sub-conscious stuff like that, i don't really take note of... hmm.. I tend to say the most evil of things at the worst of times.. it's just in the moment and I HAVE to say it.. like when a person really sucks and the rest doesn't say it out of courtesy, I would just skip the niceness and just tell the person he/she sucks and he/she should go piss off.. yep.. that's me alright.. it drives everyone nuts when i do that...



that done, moving on to Friday's Feast:

Appetizer
What does the color pink make you think of?

Cindy. she's always pink from head to toe...

Soup
Name something you have lost but later found.

hmm.. lotsa stuff.. most significant one was my keys, i used to misplace them all over the place..

Salad
In 3 words, describe this past week.

Living, fucking, HELL.


Main Course
What are you obsessed with?

i'm obsessed with.. lots of things... i'm obsessed with my glasses, with my shoes, my cat, my books, my pens.. used to be obsessed with my boyfriend, but now he's one of them in the "ex-boyfriends" list. so yeah, i'm obsessed with wanting to murder him now.

Dessert
What kind of perfume or cologne do you like to wear?

ooh.. easy question..
I went to france, came back with my Giorgio Armarni "Night" and two other perfumes which I didn't bother memorising their names, but they're good stuff.. so yeah..


Let's see now...
oh yeah.. the optician... tinted frameless glasses.. they look somewhat like ian's glasses.. no screws...
I wanted to get those SwissFlex.. but they're soooo expensive.. not worth buying them... but it was dead cute. Fell in love with them the moment I had them on....

I wanted to get hard lenses..but after some consideration, I figured I don't need them.. coz my degree's so light compared to other peoples... So we (mom and i) decided I should get that frameless ones.. she was asking "If I said NO to the hard lenses... what will you do?" hah.. I told her "I'd demand stubbornly for a pair of frameless tinted glasses that are super durable." ahhas.. mom was like "okay, you're on it. i'm not getting you those hard lenses."

ughs... having a crazy migraine now.. it's killing me.. but yeah.. gotta bear with it.. still have so much work to do... 7 months ago, I thought being in poly, it'll be such a slacky thing.. I can slack all day, play, have fun.... no work.. but when I got to NYP, it's the entire opposite.. I have too much work to do, I haven't played an outdoor sport in ages, there IS fun, but it's humour fun, not the fun fun i was looking for... everyday in NYP is work.. it's tiring..

I'm heading for a major burn out soon.. hopefully this december's YEP thing will let me get some mental rest.. dealing with ex-cons would be a new experience.. But I do hope those guys will give me a good break by then.. I really don't wanna deal with some attitude problem punk again..

I've dealt with more than enough, when I thought one was enough, I had to deal with two.. lucky the second one decided to call it quits.. hope that makes things easier for me to handle.. ugh.. who knows.. i might have to face more in school? :S
hopefully that shan't happen if I'm happy and smiling in school.

School proves to be fun so far...
I like it here in MB0406.. we proved to be a fun crazy bunch of people, who seriously yell too much and play too much in class.. (we end up annoying the teachers all the time)
Allison and peisuan never fail to cheer me up, thanks yah girls.. ;) your help is greatly appreciated by the oh-so-evil one.. mauahhs...

seriously, without them, i'd have become like gary already, ready to give up hope and just die off like that...
Stress at home sometimes is simply too hard to cope with. With haydern's behaviour, he's not making things any easier for me. In short term, his plan works well.. but in a long run, who am i to turn to? haiz...

Relying once again on my diary (I bought a new one the other day in Popular) I shan't blog much here unless I haven't got the time..

I seriously need that PDA.. to plan all my shit out...
this is dumb.
life is stupid.

Well, at least i'm making it out to be stupid.
It's laughable if you come to think about it.

damn, I hungry.. snacks...
toodles for tonight!

suddenly feeling fucking pissed off.. and frustrated..
dont' know why but that's how i'm feeling now.

Just hate it when it happens, when i get all frustrated over nothing..

it's stupid.

i seriously hate my life now.

Wouldn't it be nice...

yeah, amanda ah... your that song ("wouldn't it be nice blah blah blah blah blah...") is getting to my head.. shit..

hahahs.. don't miss me ah darhling amanda.. :P
oh man.. haha. you just came online.. haha..

anyway...

yeah.. gary had a weird dream last night.. won't bother explaining into the details of it coz it's super ridiculous.. it's a no wonder that he looks like he hates me now and he's not talking to me anytime soon coz of the dream.

Mom had a weird dream too.. everyone's having weird dreams except me.. coz my nightmares do turn true.. and if I do get weird dreams, 70% of the time, they're for real in the end...

Like what happened with me and haydern, I dreamt of it before.. it was a horrible nightmare, that turned real. so terribly real.. no wonder I didn't feel anything much when he told me last night that it's all over. I guess I was kinda prepared for all this shit to happen..

So much for the henna kumaran used on me, yeah?

*shrugs* Oh well, once the anger subsides, it's back to seriousness for me.. hmm... I should vent all this anger in my studies.. that's right.. hahas.. guys are sick creatures.. well, they're jerks.. no offence, but sometimes you fellas say the dumbest, most annoying things ever. It's not like you boys can help it, but anyway.. yeah, guys who do become my boyfriends, and when you do break up with me, if you are gonna break up with me, at least give me some face, and CALL me up rather than to send me a fucking message.

I seriously hate guys at this moment, especially the one being such an asshole. he KNOWS who he is. everyone knows who he is.

Oh, I had a quick chat with Bertram the other night..
I had to tell him like I was ANGELINE.. we took neoprints before..
and he was like "ooooh... yeah, how's it going?"

haha.. that guy is seriously so blur sometimes.
Majin's back online! that guy.. I think he was thrown into jail coz of some drug thing.. anyways, maj's from Canada.. cool guy.. he earns money just by gaming..
he's really nice.. although he smokes and drinks and does drugs like it's nothing..

hmmm...
I think I shall go for that YEP thing.. mom seems okay with it.. go thailand.. and then perhaps I can have some time out for myself..
I'm getting sick of all this drama..
Dunno what haydern is trying to play at. He needs a serious reality check for himself.

haiz...
Sometimes, I can just really scream and hate this entire world.. then again, what's the use of it...
I really blame myself for being such a naive person to believe everything everyone tells me. Maybe I shouldn't trust people anymore.. It's doing me fucking no good.

ugh.. gotta stop with the vulgarities.. i hate to use it.. stupid... clement ah.. you and your foul mouth.. it's getting to me too! hahahs..

ugh... i have 5 tutorials to do... of which it's all math...
and um... I need a PalmTop.. i'll get mom and dad to go to Courts to get a good cheap one for me.. :) hahas.. make gary drool..
but I need one anyway.. I can never keep track of the things that I have to do..

let's see...
I have 1 inorg chem, 2 physical chem, 1 microA lab reports to complete by sunday night.. then that gene mutation thing.. ugh.. and then.. um... 3 microA tutorials, 2 inorg chem tutorials, 1 physical chem tutorial... ugh.. so much homework.. I didn't feel like doing my work the past 2 weeks.. :S gotta slug now..

anyway, off to do my mugging...

Once again, guys are freakos...
maybe I should be lesbian...

I've got my amanda darling anyway.. hahas.. this is sick.

toodles!

2004-08-20

RECORDDDD!!!!!

I slept a solid TWELVE hours yesterday!!!!
from 7.30pm all the way till this morning 8.30am!!!

My head was like pounding and it felt soooo heavy so the moment I got home, I blogged, showered and hit the bed...
I skipped dinner, mom woke me up once last night to ask if I wanted to eat..
I was like "noo... go away.. i wanna sleep.."

Even if it was my favourite Campbell's cream of chicken/mushroom with a dropped egg in it.. (it's super yummy!) I still wouldn't wake up to eat it... coz i was simply too tired...

Can you imagine, even after all that 12 hours of non-stop sleeping, I still wanted to stay in bed and have more sleep?
All through today, I wasn't listening in class...was too restless and dead.. ahahs..

Hmm.. I forced myself to eat some stuff in the later part of the afternoon.. as in about 2.30pm, I went to the canteen and bought some stuff to eat... force feeding yet again.. I wasn't even hungry.. in fact I felt very very full...

well, I called dad up to pick me up..

OHHHH!!!! I got short listed for the zebrafish project!!! :D
This is sooooo cool! I have to be in Q.605 on Monday at 2pm...
*gets all excited* clement's gonna be in it too!!! oh man... this is gonna be such a blast!! I can't wait to take care of all those cute 'ickle fishies.. hahaha... maybe I shall take some back and put them in charmaine's shark infested aquarium, yah char? I'll make those zebrafish glow in the dark.. it'll be sooo cool.. hahhaha...

well, i don't know if I ought to go for the 18th September's choir thing at the home of the handicapped elderly..
There's so much to study... I think I won't go for this one time.. i need to pass this CT...

anyway.. yeah.. shan't blog much today...
I wanna go sleep again...
still feeling tired...

byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....

2004-08-19

uuggghhh......

Today's microA lab session was frigging fun!! :)
But while doing our work wrongly, our bench had one set of innoculated
growths only.. while the rest had 2... hahah..

But it was fucken fun setting the table on fire with ethanol and flame...
Tim's idea actually... he had this smiley face drawn on the table with
the ethanol using the spread plate triangle thingy... (I forgot the
actual term and i'm not bothering to open my lab book)
Then.. he proceeded on to set the triangle thing on fire coz it's been
doused in ethanol for lord knows how long...
and lit the table on fire... it was fascinating, to say in the least... :D

Oh, dad wasn't happy that I wanted to go for that 18-day YEP thing..
it's a Youth Expedition Programme that happens in December...
This coming december in fact.. it's December 1st to December 18th.. it'll be worth the experience...
It'll be clocked into my NYAA stuff..

*sighs*
You should have seen my dad's face when he told me he wasn't happy.. he
was frowning and then had this annoyed look and his face was really
black... and he said really bluntly, "Stop getting involved in all
this church things. you're not CHRISTIAN.. so stop mixing around with
that sort of people."


Haha.. like i want to get converted... I may not be an entirely
devoted buddhist, but that doesn't mean that I'll be running towards
christianity..
it just so happens that 80% of my friends are general christians..
They have fun stuff to do, so I just be a parasite and tagalong.. I
just merely be a tolerant person when they pray, as any muslim would
be tolerant to a chinese's praying tradition and vice versa....

Oh mich.. it's email blogging.. means i blog from my email.. not from my phone...
hahas... it's pretty cool doing it...

anyway, i'm feeling sick...
dunno if i wanna go school tomorrow.. ughs.. but there's french.. >__< i don't wanna miss french...
uggghhsss.....
haiz....

I hate school all of a sudden.. I don't know..

oh man.. get me out of this hell hole..

I think I inhaled in too much of all that disgusting agar disk thing.. they STINK badly... yuck.. have been feeling sick and queasy ever since.. i shouldn't have eaten anything during lunch just now..

I'm gonna go shower then go sleep..

callin' it quits for tonight.. byee..

2004-08-18

Sickos....are melvin that BARNEY..

hahas..
okay, i'm home, bored, with lots of homework to do... a frigging crazy dizzy headache.. and i'm sick...

Today, I went to school for TWO lessons only.
one in the morning 8am, and then the last lesson for the day at 1pm..
I wasted soooo much time today..
what with like this quick meeting at LT-M1.. for the GSS.. not Great Singapore Sale.. but the Great Singapore SURF.

OOOHHH!!! the html's DO work after all!!! hahahahs...

Anyway, went for that stupid OBS Sabah thingy.. waited for like an unfair THREE hours, sitting there.. absolutely bored out of my mind, feeling queasy coz i was sick and didn't have any medicine i could eat (only coz i didn't have lunch.. i forgot lunch in the first place) and i was being bullied by that stupid melvin.

Stupid ku ku... keep tickling me.. and annoying me.. he's my OGL during orientation, remember? anyway, he was being such a piss off in his pants today.. annoying fool.. i ended up whacking the shit out of him.. stupid ass...

Bully sick girl like me.. sicko melvin...
he looks like daryl.. acts like daryl too.. sicko... sicko melvin... bully me.. he shall have to PAY for the consequences.. hmmm.. actually he paid for it already.. eternal humiliation for being MB0406's "Barney, the purple dino" muahaahhas...

Then, after we were told to mail ying shya for the interview thing.. (ughs..) i talked to Miss Yvette.. she's the school's councellor.. told her about gary.. she had this "oooh..." look on her face.. hehs.. what's that supposed to mean anyway?

hmmm... in 2 weeks' time, I have to do the presentations for that project on Gene Mutation.. Can't wait to do some presentations! :)
uhm.... what else....

Oh yes, yes... haha.. how can i ever forget...
i'm going down to Gwen gwen's school on this week's saturday.. :) seminar for prospectus schools held there for the girls' there.. yummy deal..
I'll get to see gwen gwen.. :) after like.. what.. 4 months!! hahas...

Then... hmmm...
most likely on the 26th, i'll be going back down to SJC for about 3-4 hours.. ahhas.. going down with Jasmine.. heee... she's my senior.. she used to be the choir president before me.. clare is also in NYP!! muahahahas...she's in SHS.. doing physiotherapy or radiography, not too sure... ahhas..

hmm... well, i'm going down to market my school's course to the girls, make my school look good.. haha.. you know what? Jasmine is still as BLUR as ever!! she's still takes like 4 minutes on average to get something right... (yes, i do count the minutes)

man.... i miss soooooo many people.....
hahah.. i know i won't miss manda.. she calls me every night.. and icq's me most of the time.. muahahs..
my classmates i see them EVERYDAY.. for the past 2 weeks!!! >__<

I miss rica... 2 weeks never see her liao...
I miss char... haven't SEEN her for like 6 months, and not talked to her in 3 days..
I miss mich... haven't SEEN her in like 2 months.. and i just talked to her only an hour ago.. she said she'd come online.. but she's not online... *grumbles* must be the brother..
I miss haydern... haven't finished my little chat with him. HAYDERN, YOU OWE ME A TALK SESSION.. ah, you don't think you can run away hor... i ain't done with having that chat.. we merely ended it early coz you had treatment to go to and i had a meeting..

anyway, yeah... haydern darling, get your line back, okay? Plleeeeeaaaassseee........ haha.. then we can continue on our chat.. i have lots to talk to you about.

um.. haiz..
okay, i gotta run... have homework to do... my mom's screaming at me to stop blogging.. ahaha.. bye everyone...! :)

In school... in block Q... at X19....

muahahha.. yet another day being stuck in school doing absolutely
nothing but THIS.

Just ended physical Chemistry lecture.. man, it sucks.. only coz I
know nuts and bolts about what that fella is rambling about into the
microphone. "Kc is relative to so many equations, like Kf and Kr and
...... blah blah blah..." oh man... *dies out of boredom and
confusion*


I'm not sure if html codes are writtable on emails, but what the heck anyway..

I'm sooo bored.. hmm... 4 hours of free time.. i'm sooo going to the
library to study later... okay, maybe not study.. hmm revision
perhaps? i dunno... uggghs...

Oh, just last night, I was being disturbed from my sleep by that
terror pet, Terra... she jumped up on to my bed (which is like 3 feet
off the floor) and started stomping her little paws all over my body..
annoying cat.. she even dared to stomp on my face! I think I picked
her up and pushed her to the side of the bed, but she kept sniffing at
my face.. It's soooooo apparent that she wanted me to wake up and play
with her, coz she was struggling to get out of my grasp when I was
forcing her to lay down beside me.. hahah....
I threw her off the bed in the last attempt to get some more sleep..
she mewed her little heart out for a while before she scampered off
into the kitchen 40 seconds later...
hahaha.. she's such a dear.. little... adorable... TERROR.

dad likes calling her "my princess ti-air-ra" haha.. mom started
calling her that soon after too.. :P lol..
I call her my "little ACT CUTE terror" and she actually responds to that name..
it's fun playing with her, but she was such a trouble this morning..
didn't want to let me get ready for school.. and in the end, when mom
came home, she decided to be the 'angel with devil's horns' and played
a good little kitten..
She decided to bid me good-bye for the day by waving to me at the
front door's gate.. haha.. how cute is she? hahaha...

Hmm... i gotta run now..
This computer needs to be used in like 15 minutes..
will blog more when i get home tonight..
I have to teach the ah pehs and the ah sohs how to use computers
later... "this is the mouse.. no, don't hit it.. it's just a term to
that... thing you're hitting now... this is your screen, click on the
big "E" you see on your screen using your mouse.. voila.. you're
done!"

........

sheesh!


hahahs..
well, off for now...
toodles! :)

Testing...

just testing the email blogging out.. muahahas.. hopefully it works..
this way, I can blog so much easily from school. Oh and peeps, I'd appreciate it if you guys could use the comment box more instead of the tagboards coz I can't view the tags in school..... :(


Receive MSN Hotmail alerts over SMS!

2004-08-17

frigging tired...

i'm so so so so sooooooo exhausted...
STUUUUPID...
that stooooopid nan quan ma ma along with linda NOT COMING TO NYP ANYMORE!!! *frowns* all my hardwork gone down the drain like that...
stupppppid.... ughs...

having a freaking headache now...
oh, Evvone Hsu is such a pain in the butt... she was being such a baby this afternoon... what's up with them singers and their stupid PMS-es...
stupid.

stupid, stupid, STUUUUPID!!!
my first event planning and it's got so fucking array... *grumbles*

Tomorrow.
I have OBS Sabah Interview to go to.. it starts 2.30pm.. and then still have to go TEACH ah peh and ah soh how to use the computers... during the Great Singapore Surf.. that starts at like 2pm.. oh man.. I just hope mr Jay and dr. Joel won't scream at me for running off to SAO to get my interview done....

hahahs...
You know what? I think I'm rather well known in school... haha.. okay, maybe not.. but alot of people know me as "Jasmine's junior"

oh and i FINALLY found out Leon's lab partner's name.. mauahahahhas... his name is Sham.. hahas.. and he's... :P Jasmine's boyfriend!!!! hahaha :) no wonder he's always so nice to me... what a nice kor kor... hahaha...
He owes me notes.. muahahahas.. ;)

hmmmm....
Oh right.... hahs... I might be going back on the 26th August to CHIJ SJC!!! *grins* but on school business... going there to promote SCL (MB) mauhahas.... loving my school life...


You know, there's probably like 50% more of what I don't even blog online.. so to "Annonymous", the admirer/school guy/whatever.. don't just assume that you know everything that goes on in my life, coz you don't.. Haydern may sound super harsh and unfeeling to you (and prolly the rest of you) but he isn't like that.. i know he still cares for me and all.. and he still does.
So unless you're gonna show your true identity, i suggest that you just give it up. You might as well give it up anyway, coz in the end, I won't want any other guy 'cept for Haydern.. I don't have to explain as to why I choose only haydern and no other guy coz i've been explaining myself for far too many times.

ugh..
annoying fool.

stupid.
this is annoying.
this headache is killing me..
i'm going to bed soon. shit, have to wait till lynz's friend comes on... stupid, that friend better come online soon, or lynz and MEEEEE (it's supposed to be 'i' but i want EMPHASIS) WILL slaughter her...
okay, violence on the loose.

anyway.. ughs.. so tired...
dahling manda was telling me to go sleep early just now.. i agree.. i should go sleep early. i look horrible. i think i'm having a fever...

DEBRAAAAAA!!!!!!!! YOU PASSED ME YOUR GERMS!!! :(

but not really your fault lah.. hah.. you didnt know you were gonna fall sick anyway..

Well, i'm off... to my la la land.. my head really hurts and the screen lights are killing my eyes once again...

MUAHAHAHAH!!!!

I CAN BLOGGGG!!!!!!!
*mega huge grin*
sitting next to me is allison and kumaran..
hahas.. we're just whiling our day away...
"I want my cinderellaaaa...." hahaa.. that's allison whinning away..
now she wants snow white...

Hmmm...
today was rather boring...
was dealing with like sodium and water today.. muahahs.. was really tempted to like make something break and explode.. haha.. allison acheived that.. haha.. they broke like 2 test tubes today.. arden and clement broke 2 too.. hahahs...

ugh.. gotta go...
stupid librarian chasing me out.. hahas...
kk.. byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....

2004-08-16

I will Carry YOU...

Okay, I cannot handle it..have to get some thing off my system that I've been wanting soooo badly to scream out loud to everyone!!! >__<

I'm proclaiming my 'love' to some, and love to only one.. hahahs...

I 'love' my dahling friends (aka) illegal 'lovers': manda, rica and debbie.. (ninah, go away, you smacked your hand into my face and positively screwed out my frameless glasses LITERALLY. don't talk to me... bleahx! hmph!)

I miss my sisters!!! CHARMAINE, and MICHELLE!!!! char, mich... i really am sooooo excited about december!!! :D hahahs.. can't wait to go over to char's place to visit her parents, her BIG house and that gravity ride thing.. and that stimulator rider in her home.. eh, char, you sure I won't bang into a tree branch while on that gravity thrill ride? hahahhahas... :P YAY!! I GET RASPBERRY LOLLIPOPS!!! :D

And then, to my ONE and ONLY lover, HAYDERN.. ahha.. yes char, call me stubborn all you want.. yeah, you too haydern.. but i still love that stubborn jackass all the same.. haha.. i was thinking and thinking and thinking last night, about how this ONE fella can irritate the hell out of me soooo much by just being stubborn..

But he's so cute when he's stubborn.. muahahahs... mmm.. i love him soooo much.. it is said that you know you love a person truly and deeply when it tears you apart to watch them get hurt but be able to do nothing much but be there for them, it hurts your heart so much that way, but it'll make you a stronger and better person when fill you with desire and well, love for the other when the problems are over.

And the greatest irony of it all is that we tend to hold on when we need to let go, and let go when we need to hold on.. I know I can't let go now, even though I'm a quarter way there.. ahha.. but with love, it inspires and gives me joy and strength.. :)

so, to haydern, this next part is just allll for you and only you.. I do hope you will know what I mean, and not shun away from me anymore.. :

Clay Aiken ~*~ I Will Carry You

Yeah I know it hurts
Yeah I know you're scared
Walking down the road that leads to who knows where
Don't you hang your head
Don't you give up yet
When courage starts to disappear I will be right here.


Chorus:
When your world breaks down
And the voices tell you "turn around."
When your dreams give up,
I will carry you

Carry You
when the stars go blind
and the darkness starts to flood your eyes
when you're falling behind
I will carry you

Everybody cries
Everybody bleeds
No one ever said that life's an easy thing

That’s the beauty of it
when you loose your way, close your eyes and go to sleep
and wake up to another day


(Chorus)

You should know now that your not alone
take my heart and we will find
you will find
your way home

When your dreams give up
I will carry you
carry you
when the stars go blind
and the darkness starts to flood your eyes
when you're falling behind

I will carry you
carry you

I will carry you
carry you
I will carry you
Carry you
I will carry you

Please stop thinking that you are a burden to me.. coz after gary, I think your condition is rather much easier to deal with than with gary's... and nope, you're no extra burden whatsoever.. coz I know you can take care of yourself and when you need help, you will turn to stanley and char and me too... :) [remember, I had to help take care of my grandma ever since I was 10.. haha.. i think i can become a fully qualified nurse for the elderly..]

yeah, that's what I wanna tell haydern.. don't give up hope yet, there's more hope in the future to come..

twice done, this the third one.

weird title? nahs.....
I rewrote this particular entry TWICE already. Coz it got too long, and I have been writing too long an entry for the whole of last week. *guilty look*
You see, old habits die hard.

Anyway, today, I was being such a PMS freak in school.. hahaha.. sorry ah, PS and allison, for my annoyingness today.. haahha.. :P
I made a royal fuss out of everything...

OOooooh.... i saw JOSHUA in the South Canteen today after school. hehs... He reminds me of.. EUGENE.. oh man.. I miss Eugene and YiHan.. my tuition kakis.. :( :( how are you guys doing, dudes? your je je here misses you two siah.. must come say hi to me once in a while ah.. send me pictures of yourselves too..

hm... PICTURES!!! :D reminds me....
muahahahs....
here are some CRAZY pictures we took yesterday.. beware, don't freak.. ahahs...

amanda n me, next, amanda and allison..


BEST FRIENDS!!! *screams* Brothers!!! Ian and Justin..


Juncheng n amanda


Amanda and debra


okay, let me type abit more while the stupid things get uploaded into that photobucket thing.. hahaha...

Hmm.. I didn't really realise that the LINKS in this blog page was PINK. goodness me... hahas.. not that I hate pink thoroughly.. I just don't have a strong liking to it.. I looooove blue-green alot.. the colour of the sea.. muahahs.. it's so soothing to my eyes...

okays... more pictures of amanda and I (since it's amanda's camera anyway..haha)
don't blame me if I looked SPASTIC.. I was half drunk. it was alcohol on an empty stomach.. cost me my dinner money.. :P



I LOOOVE this pic here.. haha..


(but i hate my eyebags.. they're horrendous)




okay, more waiting...
hahas..
hmm..oh you know what.. I was being such an evil meanie sister just now at the dinner table...
Edwin told me he was gonna go for this spelling bee competition.. I know I should be supporting him all the way in it.. but the thing is, he SUCKS in spelling. Up till today, he still asks me how to spell the word 'Chair' and 'Actually' and 'Aeroplane'... those words were taught to him like 3 years ago!!! >__<

Gary and I were teasing him endlessly about it.. and when I thought of quitting it (the teasing), Edwin went spelling 'WHAT' as 'WHIT'!!!! >____< I couldn't help it...
my goodness... I started chiding him about it over the dinner table in a joking manner, yet he got too sensitive and took it the wrong way.. and he started sulking, then throwing his stupid tantrum and then he started crying as usual.. ughs. he's still such a baby.

here's the last of the pics i have with amanda..
hahaha.. seriously, we're such camera hoggers... :P

SPASTICISM!!!! ^-^V


Allison...

the monkey...

Debra and me next!!!

Lastly.... get prepared... it's not much lah.. won't really cause a heart attack to many... but....
"LESBIANS" GALORE!!!!! MUAHAHAHAHH!!!! :P


okay, debra and I were seriously frigging bored... we had nothing else better to do.. so yah...
hahahs...

hmm... okay, i underestimated myself again.. this entry is frigging long.. and it didn't say much about today's events.. *sighs*

hahaha... gotta go now... HOMEWORK!!! *freaks out*

2004-08-15

TEN MINUTES!!!!

ten minutes of fireworks!!! how cool is that...
today was more than just breath-taking...
tonight's fireworks was spectacular, a blast, a mind-blowing effect..
it was grand, it was... wow.

just soooo wow! haha.. yea, for once i've ran out of vocabs to describe what I saw in the dark night sky... it was... wow...

wait, wait.. let me do the Unconscious Mutterings for this week.. hehe.. :P

Server :: Starhub net server..
Charlotte :: good charlotte, charlotte church!
Jackson :: my net buddy from San Fransisco!! how's you be doing, dude?
Resentment :: disappointment..
Controlling :: control freaks
Intense :: anger
November :: november 7th.. a day i can't forget
Donkey :: stubborn ass=haydern.. ahahs.. haydern is a donkey.. j/k.. :P
Weave :: weaving through the crowd like fishes in the sea
Satisfies :: fireworks.

hahaha.. yes, watching fireworks really satisfies my rocky life.. hahaha...
Haiz.. it's a real pity haydern and char and mich and stand and devon couldn't be here to watch it... it was like TEN minutes!!! Sooooooo nice!!! :D

oh man...
i gotta make tonight's entry short.. it's like 2.17am now.. char just went off to sleep... poor girl, rushing through her F&N project...
haha.. oh man, reminds me of MY projects.. :S

okok, gotta go do my homework..
i shall blog tomorrow...

255 posts.... and counting..

know what..

actually, I don't know.. haha.. okay, lame..

okay, here's the lame deal...
I've got a 'lover'.. an ILLEGAL 'lover' and HER name is AMANDA..
well, actually, she proclaimed that i'm her illegal 'lover'.. heh.. now people are gonna start thinking i'm some.. lesbian..

Which I can very well assure you, I am NOT a lesbian..

hahhahahha...
hmm.. charmaine said something really hilarious last night.. if only I can remember what she said.. :S I've been forgetting lots of things as of late.. jialatz..
oi, I slept EIGHT hours last night, okay..

maybe i bumped my head on something again and didn't realise it.. hmmm...
yah, it's junius.. yesterday keep bullying me... *grumbles* that stupid.. piggish.. THING. ugh.. i WILL get my revenge... you will die under my hands, you pig!!! i still hate yoooooou...... no, i don't love you.. i hate yooooou..... you pig.. what sort of brother are you siah... hmph..!

uughh... that yucky pig thing.. bleah.. *grumbles some more*
hmm.... oh yes.. charmaine was screaming to me about haydern doing something to his mobile phone.. ahha.. and I was like "haiyoh.. that guy ah" and she went laughing away.. called him a rascal.. ahha.. haydern dear, what did you do to your phone again? charmaine was positively ranting away last night.. poor girl.. hahas..

ha.. okay, i'm going mad.. i do hope y'all don't go "ewwww" at the affectionate name calling i say to haydern.. hah.. it's just through habit.. hmm.. i just do hope he gets a suitable donar soon.. perhaps i should try yah.. but it takes up like 3 months.. i don't know if that's enough time.. :S haiz.. so many things, so little time..

When I reach 18 in october, I'm sooo going to that blood centre to donate a pint of blood of mine.. hahas.. They'll find good use of my blood.. they need more of my type anyway.. ahhas.. there's a blood drive this september 5th at ponggol CC.. i'm going for it.. ahha.. i'll drag mom along to sign the forms for me..

hmm.. I'll need to get a bus concession stamp soon.. all this travelling about to and fro school is making me spend so much on it..

I'm meeting amanda later.. not sure if i'll have to fend for myself and go down to her place, or meet up with her in town.. her parents confiscated her lappy... poor girl..

why's her parents doing this to her? why are they showing such huge a mistrust in her? why are they trying to make her life such a living hell?

only because they think what they do is best for her.
Which I think sucks.

How's she gonna do her homework at this rate?
how's she gonna go about contacting her friends, or even call home?

She didn't do anything wrong except to talk to her best friends.. is that so hard to accept?


I don't know why they're doing all this, but we'll all try to be there for you, k, manda? :) keep that lovely chin of yours up, girl.. things aren't that bad.. you just gotta look on the brighter side and not let them break you down like it nearly did for me.

haha... you know, as much as I can become such a devilish person, I'm always trying to be there for everyone.. hard task you know, since everyone's problems are so hugely staked on their lives..

my brother.. yeah, he staked a huge part of his life into depression, i just hope i can be strong enough to be there for him..

haydern, his life.. is definitely at stake.. and to be there for him, is the only thing I HAVE to do.. i just can't watch a person wither away and not spend his days happy.. everyone needs to be happy! it's a MUST to be happy at all times.. haha..

amanda.. well, she's just breaking down slowly.. her parents playing such a heartless and cruel game on her and her younger brother.. to be there for her as a friend, is what I have to do as well.. she needs someone whom she can talk to.. i hope i have enough energy to carry out the listening.. haha...

my two best friends, debra and serica, whom i've been too busy to talk to... it's a good thing they understand, and it's a good thing i've become a good listener.. they still whine and complain just as much, but it's so nice to hear them do that.. i end up laughing at how they turn their sorrows into such happy situations.. :) they're my source of energy actually.. haha.. i'm so greatful and glad to have them in my life.. :) and for whatever reasons you need to call me at night to rant and ramble ah.. you HAVE to call me FIRST. okay? hahas..

haha.. my goodness, what a testimonial.. i still have a little bit more to go till i'm done..

my friends in school.. the classmates, the seniors, the various people around in school.. well, actually, I wanna tell my sinister trio.. you two ROCK man.. without you two, i'd be long gone dead, buried in my coffin, six feet under with the books and notes piled on top of me.. hahaa.. the guys in class have been nice to me.. only coz i'm rather nice to them.. but then again, I haven't been interacting much in class besides the sinister trio and the two gays.. the rest, it's only sometimes that I add in some sacarstic comment to their lame jokes.. ahhah.. makes others laugh but they go "kaoz.. you idiot.. so evil one.." hahaha....

and Jezzie kor.. my information source when I need help with homework.. whahhs.. my live dictionary.. he's always there to explain difficult terms and make them super super easy for me to understand.. *muacks* you're the best, kor! :)

and then lastly but not in the bit least...
charmaine and michelle.. although you two aren't always there.. you two always put a big smile on my face whenever I chat with you two.. ahha.. char.. remember to put those raspberry lollipops into that vending machine when mich and i are gonna visit you yah.. :P and i want a GRAAAAND tour of your house too!! :) oh man.. this is gonna be so much fun!! hahaha..

ughh... shit i'm running late..
i'll blog tomorrow...
byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....
and haydern dear, remember to do something about that phone... and eat your meals too.. and get more rest and yeah.. the usual ah, you know that usual speech i give you all the time right? :) byeee... miss ya lots..