2004-04-30

:)

Let the music take control of your soul...
Listening to: Mandy Moore & Center Stage ~*~ We're Dancin'
Mood: Happy happy happy!!! :D


okay, went out with Rica, debbz and ninah today... we went to east coast park...
it's by the beach!! ^__^ those skin surfers were there today.. hahaha... they should've been there last sunday...
when the waves were HUGE!!!

Anyway, told rica and deb some stuff....
they were like, "WHAAAAT!?!?!?" hahaha... their reactions are always one of a kind... haahah!!

have a rather bumpy bruise on my leg... rather, my bone... hahaha... it hurts... but it was absolutely accidental that it happened.... hit my leg on the metal bar of the seat in the bus while it was turning... damn bus was super packed....

*yawn*
i'm tired...
oh you know, those frigging blades I borrowed from that stupid shop....
they're soooo horrible!!! yucks!!! don't care... i'm gonna save up my money... and then i'm gonna go with rica to get my own pair of blades....
it was too tight... stupid fella... put until so tight...
made my calf muscles cramp up... was so pissed off at that shop... but anyway...
now i know not to go to that shop anymore.. hmph..

oh, and things aren't so complicated anymore... or at least...
it isn't AS complicated as it seems anymore... :) i'm happy about that...
my friends are supportive of my decisions.. and i'm glad...
hahaha... although i know one or two are thinking i'm mad... oh well... ^_~

anyways,
am seriously very tired....
gotta go bathe... hahaha... toodles for today!


Till then, write later..
*~Au Revoir~*

2004-04-29

well well well...

things get abit more complicated...
Listening to: John Mayer ~*~ Your body's a wonderland
Mood: bored... tired..


Chatted for a very long time with haydern over sms last night...
hahaha... he's such a joker...

anyways...
today.. nothing much happened. Heard mom screaming out her lungs at 7am, for edwin to hurry the fuck up..
serves him right, don't wanna move faster..

Then, I woke up at 8am.. checked my phone for any messages.. none waiting to be read..
had a bath, a cup of milo.. and began my daily routine...
of chatting.. again.
chatted with Jenna, aunt teresa.. ken.. luigi, jon, ah mun... and that's about it again...
:)
anyway, went to get my med. report... i'm A-okay!!!
thank goodness...

gonna go get a bath again...
blog later...

Till then, write later..
*~Au Revoir~*

2004-04-28

randomness...

A letter to No one in particular
Listening to: Namie Amuro ~*~ Come
Mood: bored... bored... worrying about something but i can't figure out what..


Dear no one in particular,

It's the first time I'm writing this, but certainly not the last instance. Well, I'm just typing this out just to pass my endless time of these 24 hours that I'm given today, to say the least. Although I use about at least 7/24 of the day sleeping, (sometimes more, sometimes less..) I am still as bored as ever.

I spend my days counting the number of hours till I get to go to school again. Everyday is the same. It is routined. I wake up in the mornings, freshen up like i always do, 5 minutes brushing my teeth, rinsing my mouth twice only, cleaning out my tongue and gums using mouth wash, rinsing off my mouth one more time, then splashing my face with a bit of water, before using a tissue to dry it.
Then next comes breakfast. It used to be a huge breakfast, but lately, I've been eating virtually nothing, technically just swallowing my saliva and perhaps, if I'm up to it, a cup of milo (aka hot chocolate). Then, the computer is on from then on. I chat with the same people I chat to every single day. Luigi the old fart, Ah mun, Joe, Ken, gins, Felix, jaspher, occassionally jezz, that kid from hongkong, my aunt, cousins.. it's always along the same lines when I chat with them. nothing ever changes..

So, all I can do is to read, type, laugh at my online mates' humour and sacarsm.. nothing ever changes. then, lunch comes, it's okay, i guess. everyday it's noodles or porridge.. what else can we eat anyway? food IS food after all.. and I hate meat. so mom cooks vegetables for me all the time. but i hardly touch the vegetables too.. all i'd eat is eggs and rice.

Well, if I'm lucky, I'd get a few messages from Haydern.. "the nice rich guy with two horns and a tail" that's what gins says of him.. I don't get why she'd say that anyway. Perhaps it's because he likes talking about his home alot but never shows me anything of it. Or perhaps it's the many gifts he's bought but never given to me. My mom never says anything about him. Just asks over motherly worry for him coz he gets himself into crazy situations most of the times. He's been in and out of the hospital the most times I've ever known a friend to have. It's amazing how he's still alive now. But I'm glad he's still very much alive.

Anyway, we'd chat through the day if he can afford that, for he has lots to study.

Besides that, everything is about the same.. chatting again, all through the day, till 2am into the morning.
That is why I'm typing you this letter. It's non-sensical but I don't really care. Just so long I have something to do.
Perhaps I should go study too. School will start in two months time. There is not much time left.

Well, this draws the letter to an end.
Don't worry, I shall type again soon.

Best regards,
Angie

Till then, write later..
*~Au Revoir~*

2004-04-27

another quiz

QUIZ!!!! oh..... coooool.... i'm a QUEEN!!!!
Listening to: Utada Hikaru ~*~ Uso mitai na I love you
Mood: tired... contented..






Which Royalty Are You? Find out! By Nishi.





Which Woman of Beauty Are You? Find out! By Nishi.







Which Woman of Legend Are You? Find out! By Nishi.



Har Har...
yeah, I'm da queen... so, not!
hehehe..
anyways, went out with Debbz and Rica today...
watched 50 First Dates... it was soooo sweet!!! *happy sigh*
one of the better heart warming shows i've ever watched!! ^_^
next few movies I soooo have to catch...
Win a date with Tad Hamilton, Ella, Shrek 2....
my gawds... sooo many movies!!!! ^_^ can't wait!!!

Anyway, I'm tired...
hahaha... gonna go day -- no, NIGHT dream... heh...
byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees..............


Till then, write later..
*~Au Revoir~*

2004-04-26

tired... bored... mindless...

well... *yAwNnNN* tired....
Listening to: Justin Timberlake ~*~ I'm lovin' it!
Mood: tired.. bored...


well, this is my life... ... ... oh man... let's see if we can find any irony out of it...
blogging twice a day... sitting around doing nothing...
but still, playing with the cat, doing house work, eating my meals and being alive...
oh wow...

*sighs*

you know, there's prolly a hell lot more I can put down in here..
but i'm tired... ugh...
so i'm not gonna bother about it..
night night!!



Till then, write later..
*~Au Revoir~*

*sneezes*

*sneeze* blah....
Listening to: Blaque Ivory ~*~ I'm good
Mood: er... hahah.. happy


well, there goes another day..
gonna meet up with debbz and rica tomorrow.. can't wait to see them again!
haven't seen debra in 2 weeks and rica in a week! hahha... yes, I miss my best friends..

anyways, today.... kinda boring..
today's Jaspher's birthday, so.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JASPHER!!!!
but yeah... other than that..
haha... had girl talk with ah mun again... she's nice to talk to...
told her about my stuff and haydern..
yup...
um.. yeah.. haha.. so bored... blog laters...


Till then, write later..
*~Au Revoir~*

2004-04-25

let's go McD's!

I'm lovin' it! dadadaaa da ta!!!!
Listening to: Grieg ~*~ Air (played by the Detmolder Kammerorchester)
Mood: i'm okay...


just really very pooped out is all..
hahaha... slept at 3.30 last night... left the computer running... woke up at 8.10am today...
that's only four hours and 50 minutes of sleep...
oh well... looking like a zombie and lovin' it!

hahaha...
felix, gins and I went crazy online last night..
can't blame us..
1) we were bored
2) we were sleep deprived
3) it was 2.30am
4) we were super bored
5) repeat lines 1-4 again..

hahahah..
oooookaaay.... lolx!!! >.<

anyway, both of them will be coming over later at about 2pm..
felix wants to d/l some of my songs into his friend's iPod.. so yeah..
then after that, we'll be heading to EC Park..
gonna message rica to see if she wants to come along...

so yeah,
i guess that's about it for now...
will be reformatting my comp...
>.< so sad... all my stuff's gonna go bye bye!


Till then, write later..
*~Au Revoir~*

2004-04-24

singing happiness

la di da....
Listening to: Nightnoise ~*~ Hugh
Mood: surprisingly happy


hahaha... yeah, I've got a secret, but i'm just going to keep it that way....
but anyways, besides being happy with that lil' secret of mine, i'm kinda pissed off with my old secondary school...
why?

Went down this morning to request if I could have my O level Certificate..
but they tell me to use my results slip instead!!
how am I to enrol into NYP if I don't have my O level cert?
it's stated strictly "GCE O level certificate"... ugh...

that aside...
everything seems to be in its place and order...
will have to give NYP a call on monday to tell them I can't send in my med. report on schedule as they sent the package late..
well, when I've got enough time, I'll go back down with gillian and serica to see the other teachers...
bring my album along for ms low to see the nice alps! *big grin*

haha...
I'm beginning to feel that blogging is like my organisor... where I plan all my stuff...
hhaha..
well, guess I should go do more planning for the near future..
blog again tonight!

Going over to grandma's soon..
to get a scolding from uncle ricky.. give him the CDs... and the VATs...
yeah...
so i'll blog later..
toodles!


Till then, write later..
*~Au Revoir~*

2004-04-22

a quote

In life, your only threat and saviour, is your own mind..
Listening to: Colin Towns ~*~ Full Circle
Mood: comtemplative


let's see...
yes, in life, your only threat and saviour, is your own mind.
I mean, I've been thinking alot since last night and today... talking with people, reading random people's blogs, and much really... watching three consecutive documentaries back to back on hypnosis, psychosis and psychology..
to only be able to survive this world that we live in today...

anyway... i learnt something new and rather informative...
it's called Suggestive Hypnosis... Jezz... correct me if I'm wrong in any of this...
Just telling it as I know it.. hehe..so it might be wrong.. having a headache now, so yeah..
anyways, as I was saying, suggestive hypnosis.. it's a suggestion that you allow yourself to believe in, to enable your mind to assume and conclude on things that aren't really there.
for example, there was a case of two girls, they went to see some psychiatrist, who turned them against their father, but using suggestive hypnosis on them... how? by implanting an event that was never there.. (being raped 5 times a week for 2 to 3 years) I mean, that's by far, the most ridiculous thing.. how can a girl ever forget something as inhumane as that? especially when that horrible deed was done by their own father? however so, these events never happened, it was just assumed by the older sister and her mind concluded that she was being raped 5 times a week when she was just a wee toddler.. (honestly, any toddler would have died by then, how on earth did she ever survive it that really happened? silly gal..)
but anyway, how does this suggestion come about her?
well, she was stressed out due to some unknown reason whatsoever, only first reaction for her was to go see a psychiatrist about it.. psychiatrist says it was probably due to a traumatic event(s) when she was a little girl.. and so, psychiatrist quickly deduces that it is indeed due to some traumatic event... when the girl starts hesitating in answering questions like "did you experience any traumatic event that occured in your childhood?" "no... i don't know.. can't remember.." these are potential signs to manipulate the patient's mind.. and implant an event that never in the patients life had ever happened.
It only takes 5 sessions to implant this image and event. and in this girl's case, the image was planted so vividly, coz the image that she assumed had been very explicit and highly intimate. therefore, her mind makes it such that she would fall for this trick. which, she ultimately did, and pulled her younger sister down to it too... and thus, they both cut off complete communication with their poor father, who had no idea whatsoever was going on..

Honestly, I think that the psychiatrist ought to be jailed for playing around with his/her patients' minds.. it's a serious offence to even implant an image or an event in somebody's mind to make them believe that the event actually took place in their life through suggestive hypnosis... that, is so inhumane!

Anyway, I do suppose that you have a rough idea of what suggestive hypnosis is now?
what I mean to say, is that... if you let yourself believe something and fall deep into that believe... and that something has been repeated or the subject on it has been constantly brought up to you (say, a session per week).. that is suggestive hypnosis. on general terms.. that is..
why do i say that it's on general terms? coz there're many other ways where suggestive hypnosis works...
in fact, it's found in everyday life...
in the army... the soldiers are being psycho-ed to be professional murderers with brutality and routined warfare plays.. ("kill! kill! kill!" "you men are marching sissies!" ) and what not... this form of suggestive hypnosis is called brainwashing... (yes, go ahead and sweatdrop all you want)
then, there's the bullying that you see in school... so the bully beats the poor kid up and spits in his face and goes "you're nothing but a coward! hahaha!!" and walks off... do that often enough, that poor kid would really end up believing that he's a real coward, and THEN goes on being a coward... see the link there?

anyways...
gary if you're reading, take note...
you tell yourself that you're gonna be depressive all the time, and you'll end up worse than a hooker on crack, who doesn't have her routine of sex and her crack. she's about to be dead...
and you'll be worse than that if you let yourself sink into that misery you specially created for yourself.
mark my words, you will.
why? coz you're using suggestive hypnosis on yourself...
unknowingly, you brainwash yourself.. and that's really very very sad..
use that brainwashing on other stuff.. stuff like positiveness and happiness..
so what if grandma died on your birthday? my best friend died, 7 months and a day before my birthday...
you think it's easy for me to get over that?
besides, you hardly even talk to grandma.. don't act as if she means that dear.. you didn't know her well..
you don't take care of her like i did.. if anyone has the reason to be depressed, it'll be mom. her dad died a day after her b-day, she took great care of grandma.. her close friend irene died.. but did she get as down as you did? yeah, for 3 days, then she's back on her feet.
if there's any one word i can describe you, it's that you're.... sick and absolutely pathetic.

you know what? forget it..
haiz... doubt anything i say you'll even take note...

i'm tired...

Till then, write later..
*~Au Revoir~*

2004-04-21

So another day passes..

So another day passes..
Listening to: Vangelis ~*~ Chariots of Fire
Mood: not sure..


Read Gary's blog...
well, sure, things are gonna happen, and they happen for a reason..
though we come with nothing and leave with nothing..
it's the in-betweens that make it happen.
Not that he'll ever read my blog anyways.. why would he be bothered with his sister's life?
He doesn't care unless he's forced to view things first-hand..

Makes me really wonder, would he really care if I died at all?
hmm.. I highly doubt so. Not that it matters anyway..

Jaspher should be back today, he said wednesday..
he owes me lunch.. muahahah.. and one outing.. i'll fix that to another day, so that it's on his off day, and I can go blading..
I'm getting the hang of it pretty much, being on wheels..
*winks and grins*
Thanks ah, felix!

Anyways, I was over at Gins yesterday..
hate staying home when my brothers are around.. there's nothing much I can do..
like I was saying, I was over at gins.. her bruise has gone down, thank gods..
but she's still suffering quite the bit.. poor girl..
We went over to Kovan's Heartland Mall to get some paper and double sided tape for her photos..
she's doing it the artistic way.. lolx.. mine's the expensive, quick way..
I was doing up my album as well.. so yeah...
made a huge mess while there.. lucky I managed to clear the clutter up! phew! :)
I overshot my curfew for yesterday, called back home to tell mom I'd be late, she said okay, and she'll leave some dinner for me, although it'll be little..
I went back about 8-plus. There was this mad guy on the same bus that I was in... he smells really bad..
and he's really insane..
I'm just sane-insane, get what I mean?
I just go crazy to let out my boredom and whatever that's built up inside..

Anyway, last night -- or rather, yesterday -- was pretty uneventful..
besides talking to ah mun je je..

And today, would be an uneventful day as well...
I just bathed Terra, powdered her... she smells really good now..
and she's stopped mewing.. haha! I think she was trying to tell me "I am in NEED of a bath!!!"
although she hates the water, she loves being warm and feeling fuzzy..
hehe.. such an adorable kitten.. ^__^
I really thank god for letting her into my life.. she's a joy to be with..

Mom wants me to clear my room today..
honestly, if you went into my room, you'll know how much of a workaholic and a shopper I am..
My whole room is full of bookshelves, and books... papers.. bags... files EVERYWHERE...
So yeah, once I'm done with my general cleaniness of my room, then i'll move to my wardrobe..
it's another one in a big mess.... (-_-;;)

well, this means I gotta get going...


Till then, write later..
*~Au Revoir~*

2004-04-20

heh heh

poems.. it's just entirely random..
Listening to:Chillout Channel from DI.fm...
Mood: bored.. it's warm, I'm hating the weather..

how to go about life.. meaninglessly..

It all happens from the start,
the ending, never fading,
the beginning, never waking.
How would you know, when your life really starts, when it ends?
When the chapter really begins,
or the closing in of its ends?

You'll never know for sure,
You'll be in constant doubt.
That's how it's always been.
You don't have to question 'how?'

It's already written out.
You'll just have to follow and work it out.


In the minds of the sibling of a crazy violatile

Bash, shout, hit, yell.
Curse, shove, get violent..
these I've seen and I'm still alive to tell.

Late nights, stressed life,
you look like you're dying.
It's all in your mind.

Your actions, your ways,
I find them ridiculous, I find them laughable in every way.
It's all in your mind, that's all I'm gonna say.

Glares, anger,
tears, sullen times,
you bear your emotions un-knowingly,
you know your other self, not willingly.
your mind is working against you,
you've polluted it.
you deserve it,
and you know it.


Till then, write later..
*~Au Revoir~*

contemplations

and I ponder.. and think.. and I have deep thoughts..
Listening to: Afterlife ~*~ Sunrise
Mood: deep in thought

well, it isn't much thought actually...
Just pretty much thinking alot... hmm... well, I need the pics from Chateau de Versailles..
Gwen, if you're reading this, can you get the CD for me? the one with this great magnificant view of rooms and gardens... beds, and huge vast grounds..

Anyways, someone talked to me about something today...
and it got me thinking about some stupid thing... but I just can't recall it now.. ugh...
so frustrating.. >.<
I think it was Luigi, that old fart. yes, you old fart, you're on my thoughts now..
hmm... it's not much what he said... wait.. it was pretty much what he said..
but it just triggered off this thought that's entirely irrevelant to what we were talking about..
think it was along the lines of: how friendship can mean alot and nothing and so much more at the same time..
OH!! now i remember...
it was Ah Mun je je that I talked to that triggered it...
:) Ah Mun's 12 years my senior... I like her, she's a very interesting person to talk to...
although she'll be thirty this year, I find that she's very much a very polite and pleasant person to talk to...
Too wise for her age, but since she's been through so much in life, I'd take my hat off to her..
anyways, we had a girl talk.. so i'm not gonna bother about adding that chat in here...that means those thoughts don't get typed out too.. hahaha.. they get written out in my other personal diary..
This is just the outer-shell me.. there are some stuff i don't tell people...
some stuff I don't even wish to think of... some stuff i don't even tell to a single soul..
and of course..
some stuff that i tell the whole world about... literally.
have no idea who reads this... don't really care who reads it..

but it'll be nice to know who reads it... :)

haiz.... I can't think now..
so I can't type anything out now...
all I know is that I'm so bored... I still have my photo album to do...
so... yeah... will be working on that...

toodles for now..

Au Revoir...

2004-04-18

argh

ARGH!!!
Listening to: Chingy ~*~ One call away
Mood: *frowns*

it's fucking coming 3am in the morning, and I'm still fucking awake.. O_O
like eyes wide, so bloody unshut! >.<

what the fuck is going on with me!!?
*sighs*

anyway, I am soooooo insane!!!!
who, in their right mind would just suddenly go "testing, testicle, testing.. test test testicles" (-_-||)
well, my uncle ricky, who else.. he's full of nonsense, i'd agree.. but i love him to bits! hahaha..
tho i think he's abit pissed off at me at the mo...

went to aunt alice's house earlier in the evening..
ah mun was there.. the nice lady friend of mine... have like 342 new photos up in my comp now... thanks to her...
i'm going to have to delete loads off... not before i copy one entire disk of it...

i'm currently super lame now...
what was it that i drank? water? cold water at aunt alice's house? man.....
i'm mad...
anyway, going to bed... toodles...

Au Revoir...

2004-04-17

*yawn* so boring...

*yawn* so boring...
Listening to: Namie Amuro ~*~ come
Mood: bored..


No matter.. Gin's coming over in about an hour's time...
i better go get a bath.. hahaha...
anyways, what was that I wanted to say actually..?

oh right..
hahah.. the reason why I blog...
1) to vent and release my annoyance
2) just to speak my mind
3) pure ramblings
4) let go of my insanity...

just to make sure I'm sane enough to face this world out there.. honestly, I'm still denying this world, and well... i'm still denying it... well... to people, it may seem like i'm denying this world...
truth is: I know the gravity of this world.. it's tough.. and rough.. and it's honestly no fun..
but the people I meet... teach me one thing.. to let loose and have fun and grab on to the seat of wild fire as the world goes on..
Just like the sayings "When the tough gets going.... " my sentence completion would be: "grab onto them, learn from them, and get going too.."
and then the other one "When life gives you lemonades..." my completion: "don't just make lemonades, sell them at 150% more and then drink up the nice cool lemonade and watch them suffer after that.."
*evil smirk*
BTW.. i'm like 81% evil.. don't ask me how my mind works... (actually it's 76%, but I cheated abit to make myself look good. heh heh...)

gotta run.. will blog again tonight when i get home from aunt alice's...
toodles..

Au Revoir...

Afterlife's:

sun riiiiiise.......
Listening to: Afterlife ~*~ Sunrise
Mood: :) for once, I'm feeling okay...


yay!!! sunday's drawing closer!!! *big grin*
but... that jaspher... not going liao... coz he's got a last minute fill-in flight to shanghai.. leaving tomorrow..
won't be back till wednesday... haiz... always liddat one.. oh well.. guess that's his job anyways..

anyways...
went out for lunch with gins, felix and their friend, Benedict..
so, made a new friend lah... hahaha.... i'm practically meeting at least 3 new faces and making friends with them every two to three weeks... not that i'm complaining...
but that's how it's been ever since I met Haydern actually..
haha... weird how this world goes about...
but ANYWAY..
we had lunch over at hougang mall... then, we went to TP to submit in gins and ben's forms..
then, headed down town to Far East Plaza to "look" at some shoes that ben wanted to "see". then, we... ah..
where did we go after that... oh right! we went to HMV, walked some, talked alot, laughed alot.. walked somemore..
met some people along the way.. then commented alot..
then gins and I bought these matching hp necklace thingys... @ $1.50.. at the top floor... annex there..
After that, we walked back up to Far East Plaza and had dinner at the Indonesian Restaurant.
food there is great.. :) thanks ah, gins, for that reccomendation! ^_^
took bus 132 home.. the guys followed me home, gins went back to get her guitar to get it tuned by ben..
those two used my toilets.. ("angeline, I need to peeeee....." heh heh..)
so, brought my guitar down.. not before I greeted Terra, my lil' baby.. hahah.. she's soooo adorable!
anyways, yeah.. we jammed... downstairs, at the corner of my void deck..
had loads of fun.. then gins came by... jammed somemore...
laughed ALOT more.. hehe... it was super fun, to say the least..
but by 11... we all over there.. all tired out liao... can see their face all so tired.. haha.. (don't deny it, k..)
I know I was tired, mom called, scolded me some... and i ran back up..
thank god it was at my void deck..

so, i'm here now... typing this.. hehe!!
oi Jaspher... remember ah, you owe me a meal.. you promise me one... hahah... which means another date with ya... oh man... you better make sure I laugh until jaw drop this time... *wink*

anyway, hope YOU had a fun day too.. (Daaaamn, so CLICHED!!)
i'm tired.. bon nuit!

Au Revoir...

2004-04-15

no title

it's soooooo humid... argh... the life of living in a tropical sunny island such as Singapore...
Listening to: Holly Valance ~*~ Help me Help you
Mood: weird

I think holly valance has a great figure. heh.. really...
anyways,
that squirt I call my younger brother.. is sick!!! it's a good and bad thing...
let's see... good thing is, I get to see him be a sissified ass... whinning away..
bad thing is... he's being too much of a sissy to me....

ugh...
a perfect yet annoying combination... *rolls eyes*
my stupid enrolment package isn't here yet... when on this frigging earth are they gonna send it to me??
*sighs*

anyways, here's a song... I listen to this most of the time... mostly coz of the beat and the tune.. i'm not one to go for lyrics... don't know why...but i love this song's lyrics as well...

Joanna Pacitti ~*~ Watch me shine
Ooh.. I'm not
You average type Of girl
I'm gonna show the world the strength in me
That sometimes they can't see
I'm about to switch my style
And soon things may get wild
But I will prove I can conquer anything
So from my head to toe I'm taking full control
I'll make it on my own
This time
(Better watch me shine)

CHORUS:
Better watch out
Going for the knockout
And I won't stop
Till I'm on top now
Not gonna give up
Until I get what's mine
Better check that I'm about to upset
And I'm glad now
So you better step back
I'm taking over
So watch me shine
So Get ready
Here I come
Until the job is done
No time to waste
There's nothing stopping me
Oh
But you don't hear me though
So now it's time to show
I'll prove I'm gonna be the best I can be
So from my head to toe
My mind body and soul
I'm taking full control
This time

CHORUS:
Better watch out
Going for the knockout
And I won't stop
Till I'm on top now
Not gonna give up
Until I get what's mine
Better check that I'm about to upset
And I'm glad now
So you better step back
I'm taking over
So watch me shine

BRIDGE:
Bet you don't think I can take it
But my mind and body are strong
Bet you don't think I can make it
It won't take long
Bet you don't think I can take it
But my mind and body are strong
Bet you don't think I can make it
It won't take long
Now watch me shine...

CHORUS X2

hahah...it's more like an ego-boost for me.. hee hee... ^_^ check!
gotta go... cya in a bit!


Au Revoir...

2004-04-14

why does it have to be so damn tough?

Why does it have to be so damn tough?
Listening to: Don Li ~*~ (title unknown)
Mood: frustrated


It's the STUPID weather!!!!
it's sooooo frigging hot!!! >.< urgh.... can't stand this weather...
and no, i won't sit, squat, lie, whatever shit there is... ugh....

anyway...
rica came over... we talked some... played with terra some...
then decided to go out to CP for a while...
and i've been home since...

it's fucking hot here!!!
ugh!!!
switching the comp off for the day....
toodles...



Au Revoir...

2004-04-13

terra...

wha... that cat ah!!!
Listening to: Micheal Buble ~*~ Fever
Mood: *frowns* agitated somewhat?

"Terra, you horrible cat!!! urine all over the house!!! NAUGHTY CAT!!!"
haha.. that's the first words that left my mouth the moment she sat quietly in front of me, trying to act innocent...
My god... she is one terror.. one cute lil' terror anyways... hahah!

hmm...
i'm hoping to learn all the basics and all that in blading by start of june...
so that I can blade to school when school starts..
okay, maybe not to school...but coming back home perhaps....

anyways, going out again...
to buy milk for terra... it's running out..
toodles..

Au Revoir...

2004-04-12

blah

blah
Listening to: Nelly Futardo ~*~ Try
Mood: beyond pissed


okay, maybe not so much now...
anyways, well, sunday will be spent at East Coast's again, trying my luck at blading...
that's what I did last night.. blading my ass off.. hahaha...

met up with Felix this afternoon at HM.. he went to get his med. report..
face never change, attitude never change, only hairstyle and skin tone changed... hahah!
that fella's still as crappy and a damn joker as usual..
Gins, sunday, we're gonna beat his goofy laughter back out... yeah?
oh yeah, Jaspher might be joining us on Sunday afterall...
we'll go early this time, yah? hopefully, about 3 or 4... before the weather decides to be tough on us again.
told you we should've gone today.. didn't even rain!! not a single drop...

oh and Majin, if you're reading this, piss off...
i know you love hacking into people's computers... so just piss off... keep off my computer.

okay, i'm fucking bored..
fucking frustrated... going to sleep....

Au Revoir...

2004-04-11

bored bored bored..

bored bored bored...
Listening to: Maroon 5 ~*~ This Love
Mood: Off-handedness

let's see...
a bitch-wannabe @ Gin's blog.. ahahah... that person is such a coward. Honestly!

Anyways, bored stiff...
I still think Hannibal was grosser than Passion of Christ...

umm yeah...
going to east coast with Gins....
talk later...


Au Revoir...

Muahahaha!!! i'm such a party-go-er...

Muahahaha!!! i'm such a party-go-er...
Listening to: Hilary Duff ~*~ Inner Strength
Mood: Happy!! ^.^

well, let's see...
Thursday, April 08, went out with Jaspher to watch movie...
Friday, April 09, went out with my family to watch the same movie I did with Jaspher the day before..
Saturday, April 10, AGAIN!! I went out to watch a movie!!! but this time, I went with Debbz to watch Passion of Christ....

whahaha... Such a movie freak...
my god... that show is fucking sadistic!! I mean, violent is one thing.. but to torture one for your own pleasure?
that is pure sickness... and with this conscience.. of my knowing how sick that can be, I know I'm sorta "saved" or so others will put it..
And again, I went for another of Debbz's church's "Praise and Worship" sessions..
reminded me of that Christian Channel which I so unknowingly flipped to while in Geneva the other day..
luckily for me.. I did not get to witness an actual "slain", as debra puts it. It's when a person, a believer in christianity, goes into some sort of trance.. (I'm just saying it as how I am seeing it.)
Well, I've seen it many times.. but those are just mild, compared to the ones I saw on TV.. it's like.. the one on tv.. was horrible?
what I saw.. was that the people were practically laughing, talking or just communicating with their past, present and future.. they were just lying on the ground, in their own minds.. their own worlds..
To an outsider (aka me..) I find that a really utterly frightening experience. This sort of behaviour, when non-believers of christianity experiences it, they tend to become violent, and they say all sorts of negative things towards these people...
If only they'd take things about 5 notches down, I'm sure they'll have EVERYONE believing in their religion..
Unfortunately for them.. it doesn't happen that way..

There is still much for me to know.. and I have yet to find them out.
But if given a choice, I'd pick to be a Catholic. Like wise, they worship Jesus, but they worship Mary as well, and Joseph.
Well, I know how they think. I mean, if you worship one, you might as well worship all.. and be fair..


anyways... met up with Jaspher, WaiMun, Alice and Jean at 7pm to have dinner date with them...
we were at Bugis, 7th Storey.. I know I can trust these people and know that they WILL be by my side for a long while.. especially wai mun...

we had a lot of fun and laughter just now...
laughing over our photos.. hahaha.. ;) really enjoyed myself...

yeah.. haha.. just stopped by a quick entry.
will update in a few days... byeeeeeeees!!!

Au Revoir...
Bon Nuit!!

2004-04-09

yeah... oh yea...

yeah, well.. let's see...
Listening to: Joanna Pacitti ~*~ Watch me shine
Mood: i'm.. frowning.. and thinking..


well, let's see...
I was reading Michelle's blog.. she sets me thinking..haha..
really reminded me of last year, when I was the exact replica of her.. all angst-ed up and stressed..
"low" self-esteem.. and pretty much feeling pretty out of it.. just bored out of everything.. you get depressed.. and just feel like you just don't like pretty much everything except the things that keep you going..
you become cold to those you don't really know after a while. and you don't know how to communicate with them, unless you find something really linking between you and the other person. It happens.
Every single person goes through that at least once in a life time..

well, mich, i'm gonna quote out from your blog.. hee.. hope ya don't mind about that..
"take time to pray, prayer changes things.. NOOO.. prayer changes people. PEOPLE changes things.."
uh hmm.. see... most people don't pray.. i for one, love saying that i don't pray. well, not to ANY god in particular... I just pray to myself. Don't know why I do that.. I just feel that, well.. why should I have to pray to another, when I can believe in myself and make myself my own god in my own world? It's my mind, my thoughts, no one can rule my thoughts 100% right? I'd be a puppet if that happens..

but inevitably, I guess, by praying, you put faith in something.. or someone.. and you just believe in yourself indirectly. and that's how people change. But for better or worse, that's up to how your mind works and proccesses..

Anyways, like I said, I was reading Mich's blog (yet again), but only for abit..
can't help but notice that she mentioned haydern being one of her motivators.. hahah.. that fella's at it again.. ;)
he was my motivator last year.. when I couldn't take it no more, he'd somehow appear there..
but sadly, well... he just didn't remember all that he's done for me.. if he knew, he'd know how much he's a saviour to me.. hahah.. honest.

right.. hmm.. what else... oh on the topic of depression.. haha..
even now, I'm feeling somewhat depressed talking about it.. nevermind, nevermind.. i'll just sit through this one and talk it out.. what's a blog for anyways? ;) to speak, of course..

how does depression go about?
well, you have to happy first before you get depressed.. it's like that...
you're happy, you feel like everything's perfect... and you lie in bed at night, thanking god for everything..
but then, the next morning.. when you wake up.. everything goes hay-wire..
well, it did for me.. let's see what happened for me..
mom screamed at me to wake up.. and then, I felt like the day just drags on...
It's like... you feel like everything that any one does for you.. it's just a facade.. to pacify you..
just to shut you up..
and that's when you feel like everyone's out to get you... and you just dettach away from everyone..
and that's when all the negative thoughts come in.. and blah blah blah.. you get the picture?

if you didn't.. tell me.. i'll try explaining again..
ANYWAYS.. going out soon.. I think I'll be sleeping in the movie theatre later..
Coz i've watched HellBoy already.. Gary wants me to go watch it again.. with our family.. mom, dad, and squirt..
Terra's home alone.. Hope she'll be fine... *is rather worried*

blah.. dad's home... gotta run soon...
did i mention how much i hate mosquitoes?

Au Revoir...

it's a... a..... um...

it's a ... blank mind for me... ha...
Listening to: Cafe Del Mar ~*~ Latin Salsa
Mood: er.. i don't know?


hahaha.. gwen.. you better tell me your blog site.. then i'll add ya in..
er.. let's see.. went out with jaspher for a movie yesterday.. we watched.. HellBoy...
it's like some kind of comic book show.. hahaha... so action hero... but it's a nice show...

anyways, here's something really interesting that I picked up in Friendster's bulletin boards..
It's called the Italian Horoscope..

Your birth date describes you!
Below, is an Italian horoscope and
you can find a lot about youself just by
searching your own identity in the Italian way.

What you have to do is to find your group with
the help of your date of birth.

Date of Birth Group

01,06,11,16,21,26,31 A1
02,07,12,17,22,27 B2
03,08,13,18,23,28 C3
04,09,14,19,24,29 D4
05,10,15,20,25,30 E5


Group A1 You consider love as the most beautiful
thing and you love to fall in love, but a number
of your group members think that the person they
love is not sincere with them. You love to be
with your friends and you are always found to be
a dutiful friend. You can hardly control your
patients, which is a very big drawback of your
nature.
The Person who is ruling your mind & heart these
days is perfect for you.


Group B2 Your dreams and ambitions are much
important for you and you can do everything to
fulfill your dreams. Love is much valuable in
your life but you always search for someone
perfect. You hardly trust someone. Your friends
are really important for you but normally you
hide a lot from them. You are a deep thinker you
always study the negative view as well as
positive.
You can lead a happy life with a person for whom
you care a lot these days.



Group C3 You always prefer mantel decisions more
then emotional ones due to this you don't have a
limited number of friends. You consider life a
very beautiful gift and you love to enjoy its
colors. There are a number of peoples who are
your ideals and you loved to spend a big part of
your time with them. You are found to be a very
sincere lover. You have a perfect control on your
emotions but sometimes your decisions really
effect your beloveds.
The person who has just appeared in your mind and
you has decided to forward this mail especially
to him/her is your real and special friend.


Group D4 Your always have goals to achieve and
you can do everything to fulfill the dreams of
those who loves you. You have a sketch of an
ideal in your mind and you always search for that
personality. Your friends means a lot to you and
you can do everything for the sake of your
friend, you a normally found to be an emotional
personality. You have a very less control on your
patients and due to this sometimes you over
react.
The one who sent you this mail & the one to whom
you will send this mail first are your real
friends.


Group E5 You are found to be a person who loves
to love. You prefer emotional decision more then
mantel decisions. You consider life just to
enjoy; you are t! he one w ho is perfect to call
FLURTIES. You love to increase the list of your
friends and beloved???s.
You have a number of dreams but you never work
hard to make your dreams come true which is the
biggest drawback in your nature you take
everything much lightly.


I come under B2 obviously.... anyway... this is soooooooo true!!!
anyways...
gotta start writing in my appointments again.... argh... so many meet-ups to go to..
oh yah, got project to do for edwin... well, gotta run then!!!


Au Revoir!! (^_~)

2004-04-07

Let me whine...

I must be a pest to everyone, coz I seem to have everyone avoiding me like some fucking plague..
Listening to: Christian Wunderlich ~*~ So in Love (AND) Caviar ~*~ Tangerine Speedo
Mood: tired, de-stressed, and a headache to bear..


went to the beach with Gins today.. East Coast beach btw.. haha..
gods.. having this horrid headache now.. it was sooooo frigging warm at the beach... thought that with those convectional currents and all that.. it'll be somewhat cooler.. stupid sun wasn't even peeking his butt out or anything...

But anyways, it was windy there.. gins and I were at the rocks.. watching some surfer dudes show off... we had like Mini Oreos, hei bai pei, and water.. hahaha.. and lunch in Mac D's.. i just luuuuuurve Mac D's... it's a wonderful palce!! the Mac D's in Dijon (France) is wonderful!! It felt more like some ancient eatery than a modern fast food...Old meets new kinda thing..

anyway.. feeling sorta depressed.. dunno.. must've been the weather.. *frowns deeply*
coz I feel like no one wants to talk to me whatsoever.. I have to start conversations all the time. and 100% of the time, I do the talking. What is it with people not being able to talk to me? I mean, I know I can't force them to talk to me.. but..
ahhh... forget it.. it's just fucking annoying that this sort of thing should even occur.. I mean, it's probably just some thing in life that I have to go through over a billion times and just deal with it like that.

The only people who ever seem to even respond to my words.. are my family, and Jezzie kor..
The people whom I thought I could talk to once.. I can't even talk to them now coz it's just so frigging awkward...
It's either I'd blurt something unpleasant to them, or they just plainly hate my guts and they just do a mildly great job by covering it up... *sighs* what the fuck.. I don't care... I probably shouldn't even talk about this anyway.. let everyone thing that 'well, she's always so happy-go-lucky and full of rubbish'... truth is.. I convince everyone so well, I even fool myself nowadays..

I seriously need a life..
I hate this present boring yet interesting one... just sooo hate it... by tomorrow, everything's new, the Old will be the new and the new, even newer..
yeah yeah... save your "good for you"s.. and whatever fucking congratulatories that you can come up with.. i hate those.

Fabio if you're ever reading this, now you know, I'm just a fucked up soul in an easy-going person.. you don't get many people like that.. then again, I don't meet many great persons like ya.. haha..

blah, whatever.



Au Revoir...

2004-04-05

Please give me a Towel, Mr Tangerine Speeeedoooo...

Please give me a Towel, Mr Tangerine Speeeedoooo....
Listening to: (obviously..) Caviar ~*~ Tangerine Speedo
Mood: I feel like singing!!


hahaha... today is a good day to have an in-house party!!! And my family members are just the perfect candidates!!! hahaha.... *winks*
well... how are they the perfect ones? for one, they don't care what I do... two, they will drink any drink that I wanna drink... three, they enjoy chocs with the accompainant of the TV and my music... four, they are the people that I LOVE the most!!!

I wouldn't mind Gins over.. but she'd rather chill out at her own home with her Poohpooh too...
Poohpooh's her lil' pug...

anyways.. dinner.. byeeeeeeeeees!!!



As of nows,

LatTaZ...

2004-04-04

Why....??? Doshitte???? Wei shen merh?!?

Why....??? Doshitte???? Wei shen merh?!?

Listening to: Mandy Moore ~*~ Watch Me shine

Mood: okay..


well... let's see...
I brought Terra to the Vet's today... John came along.. no, not best friend Jonathan..
that fella's all the way in Australia.. so nice of him to do that to me.. hmph!
but anyways.. it's John.. gin's neighbour.. yeah.. haha.. he volunteered to accompany me along to the vet's coz he wanted to see cute lil Terra...
who turned out to be a.... (gasp on 3.. 3!)*gAsPs!* girl!!! Terra's a girl!!!! awww.....

Anyways.. John, thanks again for coming along... it's nice to have a friend along.. :) hahah... Terra sure had sharp claws right?
Oh, Vet said Terra's suffering from a mild fungal attack..said that Terra was lucky not to get anything worse than that...
*grins* thank gods she didnt' get any worser than that right, John?
Oh and john ah.. thanks for the directions ah.. hahhaa.. 11 days not in singapore and i'm so frigging blur liao... >.<

Well, spent the entire afternoon taking care of Terra.. she kept running about... and climbing out of the box..
in the end, I got rather fed-up, scolded her abit, and then dropped her into a bowl of nice warm water... she loved it.. surprisingly! and then i gave her the shampoo.. and i washed her off... did she love it... hahaha.. but she felt like bathing a baby with LOTS of hair to me... after that.. i dried her off.. and went on to powder her up... with the anti-biotical powder the vet gave me..

After dinner.. can you believe it? Terra follows me about now..!! :D finally she knows who I am.. i hope.. hahah..

before that... i was having a heart-to-heart, girls-only, sisterly talk with Ah Mun je je.. she was like teaching me everything she knew in life.. hahaha... she's so cute leh... "you must make sure you know how to finance your money ah, angie.. then mustn't forget things like me ah... me, old woman.. always forget things one.. ho ho ho..." hahaha... she's so humourous!!

Then, I was also talking to Jaspher.. that fella... going out with him on Tuesday.. coz that's his off-day.. so, we might be watching a movie.. or having a drink... throwing peanuts and ice at each other.. haha.. that joker... say if i miss the snow.. he'll bring me to Snow City.. i was like "don't bring me there.. the 'snow' there is ICE ah..you throw that at me or vice versa, you see me in the hospital!!" and then his reply was "ok lor.. then we sleep side by side in the hospital then wake up liao throw tablets at each other lah! haha!" hahahahahah!!! hai yoh.. that guy ah... you'd actually wonder if he's REALLY 28 years old anot.. ("27 ah!!") right, 27 then!

anyways.. i'm hungry... gonna find something to eat...

As of nows,


Au Revior!!

2004-04-03

sleepless nights... sleep in mornings...

sleepless nights... sleep in mornings..

Listening to: Alicia Keys ~*~ Falling in love with you

Mood: it's like any other day... :P


okay, so... i'm home!! From Switzerland.. *grins*
I've made alot of new friends.. there's Jean, Jaspher, Wai Mun, Alice.. the wong's.. the lim's.. dr. henry and aunt lydia.. mr pang and his wife.. ah teng.. mdm's koh and soh, the chew's..

and I've come to dislike several people too... those four STUPID flowers!! grr... they're just sooooo annoying!!!

Anyways.. Switzerland is soooooooo full of FUN!!!!! everyone SHOULD go there!! oh and Yaggi, if you're reading this, I FINALLY know what snow is!!! you were right, snow IS fun.. but so was Effiel Tower.. *smirks* i was over 200 feet up in the air.... how about that? doubt you can survive that.. and well.. i went up to Mont Blanc's Charmonix, Mt. Titlis and sooo many other places... it snowed every day... till we were in geneva... it rained quite the bit in lucerne... and here and there... but anyways... i know i enjoyed myself tremendously...

Well, it'll only be about.. 2141hours now in paris....
i'll blog more tomorrow.. sweet dreams!!

Au Revior!!


As of nows,

LatTaZ...